Donna Noble Kidnapped! Out of this World written by Jacqueline Rayner and directed by Barnaby Edwards

What’s it about: Donna’s home, but she’s not quite herself. Sylvia has some ideas to bring her out of herself – involving an old friend, and speed-dating... As schoolgirl BFFs Donna and Natalie get reacquainted, a mysterious stranger dogs their steps. Is the Doctor keeping tabs on her, or is the truth far more sinister?

Tempestuous Temp: Coming home and picking up life might have become a trope during the Moffat era but it was quite the novelty at this stage of the game and the creators of this set have chosen the perfect moment in Donna’s run for her to want to come home a heal before heading out and travelling with the Doctor again. Her experiences in Library were traumatic in the extreme (being handed a domestic life and having it cruelly and sadistically snatched away) and a little time with her Gramps (less so her mother) and some retail therapy and friends is just the ticket. But with Sylvia giving her the usual gob and setting her up for speed dating, things aren’t going to be quiet. Donna’s outrageous lies in the speed dating sequence will have you howling. She’s a card, that one. Donna is quick to react when she thinks that somebody is following her, thinking the Doctor has sent one of his UNIT pals to keep tabs on her. She’s been having nightmares, talking in her sleep after her recent upset. Since the Library, Donna has found herself questioning the nature of reality. To her friends questioning the nature of reality makes her sounds like a total nut (especially when she keeps going on about her ‘Doctor’) but to those in the know this is intriguing fallout to her personal crisis in VR. It’s the sort of cracks between stories development we often miss with the new series because we need to get on with the next adventure and I’m really pleased to see it explored here. Donna’s glorious scene with the Doctor at the end of Forest of the Dead is still one of the best ever Doctor/companion scenes (‘Is alright special Time Lord code for not being alright at all?’ ‘Why?’ ‘Because I’m alight too’) and Kidnapped! shows what happened next. With Donna and Nat kidnapped it delivers the advantageous format of having Donna as the experienced time traveller with Nat as her green companion. It makes Donna the shining star we always knew she was. Give me more.

Sidechick: Such a smart idea bringing in Wardley from Tate’s comedy show to play Donna’s ‘companion’ for this set. They already have an established chemistry which is obvious from the outset and Wardley has experience with audio drama and sounds perfectly at home with this style of acting. Donna has always been honest with her friends, and so even if she is saying crazy things Nat knows that what she is saying has merit. I love the fact that their first scene together made me frightened that this was going to wind up being a four hour long Catherine Tate sketch (I happen to love the show but I wouldn’t want one sketch to be elongated to 240 minutes and by the end of the story they had become a thoroughly engaging investigative duo (albeit with acidic one liners and pop culture references galore). It bodes extremely well for the set ahead.

Mother from Hell: Sylvia loathes the Doctor because all he brings to their door is death and disaster. Frankly hers is the most natural response to him tumbling into your life and turning it upside down. Whilst there are some laughs along the way, Sylvia is right, he does tend to leave people shaken and not in a positive way. Had Donna listened to her mother she might have been spared the heartache of having her life with the Doctor stolen away. But then she would also have been denied the trip of a lifetime (for her and us) and that simply would not do. Nobody says no to Sylvia, she’s scary. And she proves it when she thinks Donna’s life is in danger and attacks a man with a golf club!

Mockney Dude: The Doctor doesn’t ring the doorbell. He isn’t a ring the doorbell sort of person. He’s more likely to blow it off its hinges and make an entrance.

Standout Performance: Catherine Tate sounds a little unsure in the first scene but is at her absolute best by the end of the story. She’s a hugely adaptative actress. Her and Wardley together is magic.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘He’s clearly about a 2 and I’m a strong 9 and he didn’t tick me!’

Great Ideas: Sometimes you know something is going to be good just because of the people who are involved with its creation. Here you have some Big Finish’s most accomplished writers (Rayner, Dorney, Goss – just take a look at their credits), the most polished and engaged director (Barnaby Edwards, the man who brought us The Chimes of Midnight) and a musician who never fails to make my heart cheer (Howard Carter, whose rendition of the Jago & Litefoot series 5 theme tune is my happy place to this day). I would take a punt and listen to anything that was being conjured up by these five people but add in the fact that Catherine Tate is involved and spotlighted (Donna is still my favourite new series companion, and one of my favourite companions out of the entirety of Doctor Who) and I was foaming at the mouth to try this. The great news is that between the two tenth Doctor sets, Donna Noble Kidnapped! and the Destiny of the Doctor and Short Trips stories we have the equivalent of an entire second season with Donna and we can only be thankful to Big Finish for that. In my rare single days, I feared that speed dating would turn out to be Hammers House of Horrors, so it’s nice to have that confirmed here. I’ve seen the ‘terror in the dating columns’ before (The X-Files pretty much had it covered in 2Shy) but throwing Donna into the mix means that this is a wildly original approach, especially with her recent domestic disturbance. Adrian is an alien whose organs are failing but he has a way of extracting what he needs from humans to repair himself…he just needs to lure them in first and the speed dating scene seemed like the most efficient way of doing that. He wants Donna’s liver because it has a little extra artron fizz to it.

Musical Cues: The series four version of the theme is still the best by a country mile. It still gets my heart racing. Accept no imitations. Especially compared to some of the ghastly compositions that came after it.

Isn’t it Odd: I’m not mad on the cover that seems to have been hastily cobbled together out of publicity shots without much thought. I’d have given this one over to Tate and Wardley and taken the time to have arranged a proper shoot. This is a pretty prestige set, and so it deserves prestige packaging.

Standout Scene: There’s a wonderfully poignant moment when the sitcom banter between Sylvia and Donna transforms into powerful drama and she admits that after losing her husband, she doesn’t want to lose anyone else. Davies is too good a writer to skip over the loss of Geoffrey Noble without tapping the emotion of grief (although how he does it in The End of Time Part Two is wonderfully unexpected and uplifting) but we never got the heart to heart between Donna and her mother where they talk about their shared loss, which is rectified here. I always loved those moments when Donna and Sylvia dropped their rivalry and you can see the blinding love that they share for each other underneath.

Result: With Catherine Tate spearheading the box set, Jaqueline King on form and Niky Wardley back at Big Finish for a second (and I would say more successful) stint, Out of this World is a story with three strong female protagonists and written by the most prolific female writers. And it’s hugely enjoyable. Whilst we’re in a time where a female-centric production shouldn’t need to be celebrated, it is worth noting that this simply has not been Big Finish’s strongest point over the years and it is something that they making great strides at rectifying. Not just more women working behind the microphone, but with box sets devoted to Donna, River, Benny, Missy, Lady Christina, Leela and Romana, Lucie Miller, Jenny, UNIT, The Paternoster Gang and ATA Girl, there is a strong emphasis on levelling the gender playing field creatively too. It’s about damn time. I’ve heard some anti-Donna opinions of late but the impression I still get all these years after her single season stint on the show is that she is a much-loved companion and she made quite an impact on fandom. She certainly did on me. I thought at first this was going to be all sitcom antics and light comedy but this transpires to have some awesome development of Donna and Sylvia that genuinely enhances series four as a result. Donna leading her own investigation is exactly what we saw in Partners in Crime (and The Unicorn and the Wasp, Turn Left) and so this feels perfectly in tune with the era. She’s a surprising protagonist because she is blisteringly funny for the most part but can turn on a dime into the seriousness of the drama and that makes for unpredictable (in the best possible way) listening. The confidence of the writing and the production (Barnaby Edwards always brings a sheen and charisma to his direction of proceedings) shines through and if you’re looking for an accomplished diversion in a difficult time and happen to be a big fan of series four, this is custom made for you (and me). Touching, funny, surprising and engaging: 8/10

DS9 – Homefront

Plot – The episode opens with a clever piece of misdirection on the part of the writers with the wormhole opening and closing at random, making it look as if the Dominion are somehow sneaking cloaked ships into the Quadrant. I like a story plotted so neatly that the very first shot is the sleight of hand that the writers pull to convince you of Dominion duplicity.

A changeling terror attack on Earth opens up an insane amount of storytelling opportunities and dramatic avenues to go down. It was the bravest direction the writers could have taken because it forces humanity to look at themselves and question who they really are in moments like this. Defiant or cowardly? Hostile or understanding? Lives have been lost and there is a being that can turn itself into anyone or anything on the planet. How long will it be until the next attack? ‘We’re not looking to destroy paradise, Mr President….we’re looking to save it’ says Sisko but it is a fine line between precautions and martial law.

The demonstration that Sisko and Leyton pull off for the President by showing him how easy it would be for a changeling to infiltrate his office, kill him and replace him, is highly effective.

Character – Jadzia and Odo are a pairing that isn’t given a great deal of consideration across seven seasons. I can only think of a handful of occasions when they are paired up together and only one episode where it is the central feature (Shadowplay). She’s behaving very mischievously here, deliberately destroying his sense of order in his quarters much to his chagrin. It reveals how the changelings like a sense of order to their lives, which humanoids often lack. It goes some way to explaining why his people are attempting to impose that very sense of direction into their lives on Earth and beyond.

Sisko was promoted at the end of the last season and now he is being promoted again as acting head of Starfleet Security. It’s almost enough to go to your head. The way up from here is to ascend to Godhood, which fortunately is a development that is coming Sisko’s way. His admission to Odo that he wished he had never found his people is said in a moment of desperation but it’s his true feelings spilling out.

What a lovely way to re-introduce Nog to the series, who left for Earth in Little Green Men, and catch up with how he is getting on in the Academy. The Jake/Nog scenes have always been a likeable ingredient in this show but one strand that has been developing since Heart of Stone are the Nog/Sisko scenes, which are a highlight here. Avery Brooks has this awkward, humorous tic when Nog is trying to extract favours from him that is a joy to watch.

Performance - Watch how effortlessly the Sisko’s are moulded into a family unit in Homefront with the introduction of the glorious Brock Peters as Joseph. He’s not above telling off his son, even if he is head of Starfleet security but he clearly loves him and his grandson deeply. He’s also one of those stalwart old men who refuses to slow down in his dotage, despite his declining health and will stick up for what he believes in, especially if people are trying to push him around or make him do things against his will. Watching both Ben and Jake having to deal with charming old curmudgeon is delightful and the chemistry between Brooks, Peters and Lofton lifts from the screen. It feels like they truly are a family. You might be one of those people that say that the scenes between the Sisko’s help to pad out this episode but given the real sense of warmth between them, the character development they receive and how they use the intimacy of this group of people to show the differing reactions to the changeling threat I simply cannot join you in that opinion. I like how they try and gently bully Joseph into taking the advice of the Doctors and how he cuts through all of that by threatening to set Jake to work in the kitchen and makes a grand statement that he is only willing to say once. He is clearly the head of this household.

Production – The cliff-hanger is trying to be a super dramatic moment by showing Starfleet military officers beaming onto the streets of Earth but it feels far too low budget to really have the impact it was going for. We needed to see soldiers beaming into every corner of the world really, to sell the idea.

Best moment – ‘Then the Andorian says…that’s not my antennae…’ Quark is telling Morn obscene jokes again, but this time he doesn’t get it at all.

Bashir’s panic when Odo offers to go visit people for him whilst he is on Earth. It’s over a year until we find out about his dark history but it is being set up perfectly here.

Odo unveiling the changeling impersonating Leyton is a great moment because it proves that even though things are afoot in Starfleet, there is a genuine threat and they can infiltrate high ranking officers. All the acts of retribution that happen after this are happening for a reason, and not just because the Admiral is paranoid. The threat is there, and he is trying to make sure the response is suitable.

The best scene amongst a sea of awesome scenes featuring Joe Sisko comes towards the climax when he is adamant that he is not going to have a blood screening because that is taking away his rights as a human being. He defies security and his son’s pleas for him to capitulate. When he is arguing and preparing food at the same time he cuts his hand in a moment of fury and Ben leans in to see if it changes into changeling goo. What follows is the best ever example of seeing fear in the face of the changeling threat. Joe is horrified that his son would for one second think he was an infiltrator and bares his teeth when he accuses him of having a mind twisted by paranoia and suspicion. It’s loaded with drama and you can see both points of view easily and that makes the conflict far more complex because there isn’t an easy side to fall on. Which then makes both of their reactions authentic. Joe’s anger expresses that of the whole of humanity, the ones who refuse to give in to fear.

Worst moment – They needed to show a President who would be excellent during peacetime but falls apart during the threat of war, which they do convincingly in the script. I’m not sure that Herschel Sparber is up to the task of bringing the complexities of this man back to life. Either that or the director (the usually excellent David Livingston) asked him to play it far, far too quietly.

A reason to watch this episode again – A society losing its identity in paranoia and suspicion following a terror attack? Does any of this ring true right now? Taking place precisely in the midway point of DS9, this is a good chance to assess where the series was right at its heart, what lessons it had learnt and where it was going. This is a fine episode, one that presents the ultimate shock impression of Earth under the thrall of a changeling attack. Does the home planet continue to allow civil liberties in the wake of a terror attack or does it impose martial law in order to protect everybody? The Gene Roddenberry approach is to have a feeling of moral superiority and behave like nobody can touch them. The Ira Steven Behr approach is to face your demons an prepare for the worst. Homefront is the happy medium between those opposing points and both arguments are made. It’s intelligently written, sensitively acted and tightly directed. Homefront has a terrifying premise and takes it to an extreme but always tells its story through the characters we know and love so it is entirely relatable. Halfway through its run and DS9 is knocking them out of the park.

****1/2 out of *****

Clue for tomorrow's review:

VOY – Barge of the Dead

Plot – Season six of Voyager is the point where this was the only Trek show delivering content. If there was ever a moment to shine, this was it because there was nothing to compete against. It’s the oddest season of Trek in that it has what I feel is a complete 50/50 split in terms of quality and it lurches dramatically between very good episodes and really terrible ones. Instalments such as Survival Instinct, Tinker Tenor Doctor Spy, Pathfinder, Memorial and Muse rub shoulders with Alice, Riddles, Virtuoso, Spirit Folk and Fury. The good stuff is very good, perhaps the best Voyager ever delivered. The bad stuff is about as bad as Trek can sink. I don’t think there has ever been another season quite like it.

Character – Janeway calling Torres ‘Lanna’ is a watershed moment between them. There’s a maternal relationship that has been fascinating to follow from the start of the series, but was kind of put on hold for a few seasons once Seven of Nine was introduced. A shame because it is as interesting a relationship as far as I am concerned and given Torres’ tricky relationship with her mum it produces fireworks from time to time that are glorious to watch. This episode explicitly makes that Captain/Engineer relationship Mother/Daughter, which I appreciated very much.

Torres thinks she inherited the forehead and the bad attitude but that is as far she goes as a Klingon. How penetrating to not go down the obvious route of Torres complaining about her Klingon half but to have to accept that her mother might be punished and sent to hell because she rejected everything that it is to be a Klingon. They strike me as just prideful and obsessed with their own self image to do that to somebody after they have died. She has to look at herself and try and understand why she hates that part of herself so much and try to come to terms with it to rescue her mother. On every level this is satisfying; as an examination of Torres and her established racism, as an examination of her relationship with her mother and as a chance for Torres to finally come to terms with the part of herself that she always tries to hide. This is where Kira was in season one DS9 when she faces the death of an honourable, dead Cardassian and claims that his hating him for the race he comes from isn’t enough. The fact that Voyager got there in season six (and still had time for some further scrutiny in season seven) is a shame but I still applaud the effort to let Torres come to terms with these things.

Whilst Neelix’s intentions are always pure, I don’t know why somebody doesn’t just sit him down and explain that they don’t need him to spend his time creating events that ram the cultures of the crew down their throats. He’s trying to do a nice thing here but celebrating Kilngon culture is the last thing that Torres would ever want to indulge in. And if he spent as much time with her as he thinks he does he would understand that. She hasn’t exactly been quiet about it. Just say ‘many thanks for thinking of me Neelix, but why not worry about your own empty existence for a while and stop trying to busy yourself with the personal affairs of other people.’ She even specifically asks him not to do this. Clearly wasting five barrels of blood wine is more important than protecting the feelings of a member of the crew to this morale officer. Later he presents food and tells people to eat it or he will force it down the gullet of their corpse. To be fair he’s been doing that since season one. Perhaps I should cut him some slack, he’s only an illusion after all.

The Paris/Torres relationship is a tricky one for me because in the hands of the shows better writers it is an authentic, loving relationship between two people from different cultures who are very drawn to each other. In the hands of the lesser writers (and when it comes to character I would certain put Braga in that category) they come across as dozy sitcom lovers who can’t keep their hands off each other or fly into a jealous rage for no good reason. The relationship swings alarmingly between the two with an unfortunate emphasis on the latter. Torres suggesting she wants to simulate a near death experience in order to contact and save her mother in the afterlife provokes an emotional reaction from Tom. He loves B’lanna and doesn’t want her to die and yet he is uniquely qualified to understand how she feels about her people, and her mother. How he steps back respectfully whilst still making it clear he wishes she wouldn’t proceed is the perfect handling of this relationship.

Performance – A wonderfully written, sweet, believable scene between Torres and Chakotay. God how I missed those in the later seasons. They were the bread and butter of the early ones. Beltran responds really well to the opportunity.

Production – In an episode where the execution is impressive throughout, the opening shots of the Delta Flyer coming into to land on Voyager from the point of view of the pilot are really impressively done.

The Barge itself is an impressive piece of design, wonderfully gothic and travelling on a sea of blood through wind and lightning towards the most ominous set of doors imagine. It’s some of the more commanding imagery that Voyager indulged in. It feels like one of the planets that they conjured up on Farscape, heavy with atmospherics. Watch as the Klingon falls into the sea of blood and is immediately set upon by hungry creatures.

Best moment – I love the scene between B’lanna and Tuvok that swings from meditation to combat. I was rolling my eyes at yet another session of candle watching with our resident Vulcan when things took a disturbing turn and he started taunting her and questioning her authenticity as a Klingon. As far as a Klingon is concerned this is real therapy, not getting in touch with your feelings but grabbing a weapon and fighting your personality. I wish the real Tuvok performed therapy in this fashion, the Voyager crew could do with the wake up call.

Watching the Voyager crew get cut down in slow motion by a bunch of blood hungry Klingons might be in my top ten favourite scenes on this show. I don’t hate all the characters but watching the ones I don’t get along with get stabbed in the stomach fills me with glee. If anybody questions that Mike Vejar was one of the most technically impressive of directors in the Trek franchise then they only need to watch this sequence. The lighting, the camerawork, the performances, it all comes together to create an atmosphere of horror and suspense.

The climax is a labyrinth of scenes packed with vivid imagery but are always rooted in character. Torres wakes up in hell and it is depicted as Voyager. Does that mean that her life there hiding away from her Klingon heritage is what she considers to be hell? All her friends chip in to tell her what a stubborn, dishonourable, unsociable woman she is. It’s the voices in her head. What is she supposed to be? A good Starfleet officer? Maquis? Lover? Klingon? This is all very healthy characterisation.

I wish they hadn’t done that – At this point I have come to accept that Voyager still wants to play about with the Alpha Quadrant races and will go to any lengths to include them. The creators know what makes Star Trek that the fans want to watch. Ferengi. Klingons. Borg. Cardassians. It should annoy because it is more pandering to where this show wants to be rather than exploring where it is but this is season six and it is past time to complain about such things. In the twilight of a series nothing is going to change and so as long as it is doing something worth watching with established continuity, that’s fine by me.

A reason to watch this episode again – Klingon episodes are not my thing (something to do with the macho posturing and the emphasis on ritual and fighting, I’m sure) and so it is no small thing for me to say that this is one of my favourite episodes of Voyager. In the long term it has no real impact but it takes hold of a character that I happen to really like, and one that has been ignored for some years now in favour of new arrivals, and takes the time to examine her in some depth and give Roxan Dawson a chance to prove what an incredible actress she can be. It has a powerful visual style and proves to be a genuinely creepy experience at times. More importantly it has a character thread that I can fully comprehend – always having difficulties getting on with your mother and having to deal with that after she has died – which is handled deftly and comes to some definitive conclusion about. Barge of the Dead is a diversion from the usual bland Delta Quadrant nonsense and nose dive into dark psychology and it has Ronald D. Moore’s fingers all over it. It’s such a shame that he ducked out of Voyager so quickly because the four episodes that surround his involvement were all very good. I can only guess what he would have gone on to do with the final two seasons.

****1/2 out of *****

Clue for tomorrow's episode: 

TNG – Time’s Arrow

Plot – It’s one of those stories that starts at the end – the discovery of Data’s head – and then goes to great lengths to show us how it got there.

Character – Because all of his friends have developed feelings for Data it is hard for them to understand how he can so dispassionately examine his own corpse (or part of it) to find the method of his demise. They have literally forgotten that he is an android that does experience fear of mortality but a machine that works with pure facts. How everybody walks around him on eggshells and looks at him longingly because of their feelings for Data is understandable but also kind of amusing. It would be like me discovering that my Alexa would be discovered far in the past one day, battered and charred, and sitting down to breakfast each day and asking her for the news of the day and bursting into tears. It was perhaps cruel of Dr Soong to create a machine in the shape of a man, not only because of Data’s desire to become human but because those around him can so easily perceive him to be human and transmit their own values and feelings onto it. The best scene that springs from Data’s discovery of his death is his reveal that he is happy to know that like all other humanoids he will now live a finite life. I am mortal, he states touchingly.

Back in the 1900s you have a number of reasonably colourful characters for Data to interact with. Jack London is a sweetheart and actually displays more charm than many of the regular TNG crowd. I also enjoy the grisly old 49er and his words of wisdom to Data for fleecing people of money in exchange for feeling good about themselves. It’s nice to see Marc Alaimo out of make up but I’m used to seeing him play a much more nuanced character than this. Jerry Hardin throws himself into the role of Samuel Clements with some gusto and I could imagine this character turning up on stage at some point. This is pure theatre; he’s practically winking out at the audience. The scenes between him and Guinan are basically the writers jettisoning the series as we recognise it and going all out for a historical movie featuring Whoopi Goldberg. It’s watchable stuff, but it doesn’t carry any weight whatsoever.

Performance – This is a lovely ensemble piece and the best moments come from the well-oiled cast all acting their socks off together as they come terms with the idea of Data’s death. A scene in the turbolift between Riker, Data and Troi sees the personal relationships between the cast spilling onto the screen for all to see.

Production – Another innovation of the Paramount backlot. It’s not the most imaginative use of the facility and despite some nice historical trappings it does feel exactly what it is, a modern day set dressed up to look like the past.

Best moment – The most impressive moment comes in the pre-titles sequence when Data’s head is revealed at the excavation site of the 19th century mine. It opens a huge can of worms about what he was doing there, his method of death (which can be ascertained now) and his participation in historical events.

Whoopi Goldberg is always good value and her scene with Picard is vague, mysterious and very well written and played.

Worst moment – The 49er is killed by the blandest set of aliens in the blandest way imaginable. It’s as if the director knew this and decided to shoot it in the mildest possible method. It hardly gets the anticipation going like the re-introduction of the Borg at the end of season three.

The cliff-hanger is even more disappointing because it features plenty of weird stuff going on as the crew are surrounded by spirits in an electric blue continuum and they find themselves drawn into a light that invades the scene. Yeah, that’s it. There’s no danger, no real understanding of what is going on, no tension and no suspense. It’s essentially our heroes stepping through (a particularly dramatic) door. Big wows. Even the aliens sit around looking a bit bored after they have gone and the credits roll.

I wish they hadn’t done that – It might have been tastier had the pre-titles sequence occurred at the beginning of the season and the reason for them finding it took place at the end. That would create some sense of mystique and suspense around the idea that Data is going to die. To have the mystery brought up, have it stated that at some point in the future he will be transported back in time, only for that moment to come literally hours later is an incredible co-incidence.

A reason to watch this episode again – Time’s Arrow strikes me as typical season five TNG; serviceable, well-acted, well intentioned and slightly bland. It has all the hallmarks of a mid-season filler episode, which is unfortunate because it is the season finale and coming on the heels of The Best of Both Worlds and Redemption. From the mighty Borg two parter the finales get consecutively weaker and this has none of the drama and drive of Redemption but it certainly isn’t as camp or meek as Descent. There is a sense of mystery but a complete lack of momentum to the episode so it feels like it has stalled in its opening stages. The aliens that are responsible for all of this are nondescript, the scenes in the past are cute but nowhere near as atmospheric as other examples of this kind of thing and the cliff-hanger lacks any punch. You shouldn’t end a season shrugging your shoulders and asking yourself if you want to keep going. It’s very nicely acted and some character scenes hit home but you would expect that of any episode of TNG at this point, and not to be the highlights of the season finale. In context this is the same point in DS9 and VOY’s run as Call to Arms and Equinox. Enough said. City on the Edge of Forever this aint.

*** out of *****

ENT - Stigma

Plot – Star Trek has a desire to provoke a reaction in people with its compulsion to push an analogy to contemporary social issues in a science fiction setting. Drugs? Check out the ‘just say no speech’ in Symbiosis. Racism? Far Beyond the Stars attacks that with fervour. Homelessness? Past Tense is all over that shit. Rape? Violations explores the horror of that and then some. Homosexuality? Rejoined has a thinly veiled metaphor in place. I have to applaud Enterprise for daring to tackle the thorny subject of HIV/AIDS in such a bold and obvious way and to make its analogy so in your face.

A sub culture whose behaviour is neither tolerated or sanctioned – that is how the minority group is described here and it could very be a description of homosexuality from the 1980s. ‘Since Panar Syndrome is transmitted by these people a cure is not a priority’ is very much a 1980s way of thinking about gay men and HIV. Was the purpose of this episode to expose how the establishment used to feel about homosexuality and AIDS? What possible relevance would that have when this episode aired? It’s obvious and unsubtle and far too bureaucratic an approach to be anywhere near provocative. ‘There’s more intolerance today than there was a thousand years ago’ says one of the Vulcan Doctors, and that is very true of our society too. Certainly, during the Roman Empire homosexuality was considered a free and unrestricted practice. I’m not sufficiently au fait with history to understand what happened to change all that but I can imagine the bible and religion had its influences.

Character – It does strike me in fiction if characters were just a little more honest with one another then things could be resolved a lot more easily. Had Trip just said ‘I don’t want to insult you but you’re really not my type and I am finding your come-ons really awkward’ then this entire subplot could have been dealt with in five seconds flat.

Archer is such a canon ball of anger and his ‘prejudice is bad!’ approach left me with my head in my hands. Just about any other Captain (maybe not Sisko, he would punch their lights out) would make a more reasonable, less emotional case. A more nuanced one.

The irony of the only black character on this show talking about monkey in the middle was clearly lost on the writers.

Performance – Jolene Balock doesn’t deserve material as weak as this, and for her character to be on the periphery of something potentially ground-breaking but ultimately vanilla. Frankly it would have been far more interesting for her as an actress if it was revealed that T’Pol was engaging in illegal mental acts instead of a victim of circumstance. That’s the angle they go with in season three with her drug addiction and it provides Balock with material far more substantial and gutsier to get to grips with. Making T’Pol a victim of mind rape rather than somebody that perpetuates mind meld pushes her far too easily into the role of a victim and takes any substance out of her involvement in this episode. It’s a double injustice, both the way she is treated and how it happened in the first place whereas a more balanced, complex approach would have had her complicit and facing the consequences.

Production – I’m at a loss with the CGI on Enterprise. Sometimes it blows my mind with some stunning vistas of alien worlds and sophisticated action sequences. However, at times it leans far too heavily on CGI to establish places and stretches the limits of the technology to breaking point and things wind up looking cartoonish. There’s a wonderful sweep over the medical facility that should have been about five seconds long but it goes on and on and gets into the detail of showing people walking about in some detail. Or not as the case is here…the people literally look like little cartoons that move with all the realism of CGI creations rather than actors. I felt the CGI on DS9 and Voyager worked much better because they started from a point of ‘can we achieve this?’ and then poured money into it if they thought they could. Enterprise is far more ambitious but falls on its face far more because of it. I actually burst out laughing at the innocence of the effects here and I’m sure that wasn’t the reaction they were going for. The old matte shots of Bajor, Cardassia and the like might have been simple but they were artful and striking in comparison.

Best moment – How delightful to meet one of Phlox’s three wives and it is even more delightful that instead of falling into each other’s arms and kissing as a human couple might, they end up sniffing each other and getting off on their pheromones. Phlox remains the most fun character on this show by some margin across the entire four seasons. It’s the least alien-centric crew and so the pay off is that the few alien characters characteristics are accentuated. Yeah, try saying that three times fast. The Denobulans seem to have invented the key to a successful marriage. One where you can spend up to four years apart at a time. The best scene comes when Phlox says ‘your loss’ with a smile when Trip says he refuses to play about with another mans wife.

Worst moment – The antiseptic nature of the episode guts it of its power. If this is supposed to be a reminder of how bad things could be if you contracted HIV in the 80s as a gay man then the episode should have pushed so much further. Ostracised T’Pol socially and professionally, and face serious pressure to step from the shadows and publicly shame herself. What people went through was diabolical and insulting. They weren’t lepers and they weren’t victims. Society handled the situation without subtlety, grace or humanity. By taking an administrative angle to this episode rather than an emotional one, it feels as though the worst T’Pol suffers is a little cultural embarrassment. We should be seeing the results of these mind melds, with no medical aid, as blatant undignified suffering, just like developing countries suffering with AIDS. It wouldn’t be entirely tasteful but to shove the horror of what is happening under people’s noses would make people sit up and pay attention. Instead the most I could get from this was ‘wow, having AIDS must be a minor inconvenience.’ Past Tense might not have been subtle but it took the rawness of living on the streets; dirty, smelly, poverty-stricken, mentally sick and it smeared it all over the audience. I left that two parter determined to do something about homelessness in my area, which I still do to this day.

The climax, which sees the Vulcan Doctor that performs ‘abhorrent acts’ standing up and saying that he is a normal person who shouldn’t be condemned for how he explores his feelings made me want to hurl something at the TV. If Rick Berman and Brannon Braga think this is tackling a subject, they need to seriously think about running a TV show. It reduces the themes addressed here to their simplest possible formula.

I wish they hadn’t done that – My partner has HIV. Anybody with a grain of intelligence can seek out information that proves that, with the correct medication, sleeping with somebody with HIV is potentially the safest sex you can possibly have because their viral count is under control and they are living and dealing with the knowledge of the infection. Undetectable is untransmittable, as the literature goes. What’s sad is that this was released at a time when there was far more stigma and far less treatment, which means the analogy tells only half of the story. Had this come out now there could be a real lesson to be learnt about just how safe a relationship and sexual exploration is with somebody with HIV who is doing all the right things. Instead Stigma pushes the drama, and makes a monster of the ‘disease’ and the unfortunate result is to perhaps buy into people’s fears. And that’s a shame because this is an example of television that could educate and do some real good.

A reason to watch this episode again – This episode had to be prompted, which shows how committed the writers were to exploring the issues in question. Mind, you only have to watch the episode to see how committed they were to exploring the oppression of sexual minorities and sexually transmitted diseases. About the only truly inflammatory thing about Stigma is that it exists. It is the least risky issue-based show I can remember seeing in Trek and an issue show that refuses to tread dangerous ground is the most sterilised piece of television I can imagine. It portrays the Vulcan medical practioners as prejudicial and backwards thinking and does further damage to a species that this series has gone to some lengths to demonise. The sub plot reveals a cute polygamous side to Denobulan culture, which is played for laughs, but Trip’s reaction to the share and share alike nature of their relationships made me uneasy. You would have thought human beings of the future would have been more enlightened. We’re halfway there already. Kudos for tackling two thorny subjects so openly, but a massive slap around the face for the cack-handed and spineless exploration of both. It is insultingly gutless. It never even attempts to get under the skin of the prejudice, which is baffling.

*1/2 out of *****

Clue for tomorrow's episode: 

VOY – State of Flux

Plot – The left Seska’s identity just long enough to establish her amongst the crew as a loyal but outspoken ex-Maquis, a good friend of Torres and someone who is a little too close with Chakotay. I was perfectly convinced at this point that she was going to be the Kira of this show, the early character that spoke her mind and that it would get her in trouble more often than not. I certainly never imagined they would have taken such a brilliant risk with an established character, revealing her to be a Russian doll of surprises. Both Kazon sympathiser and Cardassian in nature, State of Flux takes its time to dish out these twists and to deal with the emotional ramifications of these shocks. This episode has Michael Piller’s fingertips all over it, the way he commanded character suspense was second to none. What’s terrific about the writing is that the story could have gone either way, that’s how uncertain I was of Seska’s intentions. Perhaps she was as innocent as she claims and the crew’s paranoia is driving me to think otherwise. That’s plausible. And perhaps she is a traitor and a sell out and she has some nefarious motive for doing so. That’s plausible too. Not many episodes can claim to have two potential outcomes that would make perfect sense, especially when they are diametrically opposed.

Torres says that a food replicator isn’t worth dying for but in an area of space where such technology isn’t viable it would be the ultimate provider. They have already established the lack of water in this region (although oddly that is something that is quickly dropped) and so this technology would be like the holy grail. It could alter the balance of power and then some.

Character – Neelix is written in a very enjoyable way here, showing his expertise of this part of the Quadrant and revealing sources of food on worlds that will sustain them. His proclamation that humans aren’t used to roughing it is valid and Chakotay’s reaction to turning away a valuable food source (when they need to conserve their power away from the replicators) just goes to show the level of luxury that Starfleet (or even Maquis) are used to.

Scenes of Seska bringing food to Chakotay’s quarters and having a romantic dinner with him are not too dissimilar to scenes we would get later in the shows run between Paris and Torres, and shows how this relationship might have progressed had Seska not been chosen to front the villains on this series. Watching her reveal her thieving activities and then flirt her way out of trouble with Chakotay reveals just how expertly she is manipulating him. She’s got him on a short string.

It’s interesting that Chakotay is happy to hear that Seska has been winding Neelix up (he’s not above a laugh at the morale officers’ expense) but immediately grows cold when he learns that she took food out of the mouths of the crew (he has a strong moral core). It’s exactly that dichotomy that this episode explores, his love for Seska is real and perfectly natural but his reservations about her behaviour and that she might potentially be the person that is selling them out to the Kazon causes him to doubt her every move. Chakotay sounds like a right mug in the last ten minutes, as though he is buying Seska’s every lie. It pleases me that this was all an act to expose her. I wish he had been written with that incisiveness more often.

Performance – Listen to Kate Mulgrew go all GI Jane when she demands Cullah ‘get off this ship!’ I did stifle a giggle. ‘I’m really easy to get along with most of the time. But I don’t like bullies. And I don’t like threats. And I don’t like you Cullah.’ And thus begins their bitter rivalry over the next two seasons.

Hackett is wonderful; kittenish early on, then the picture of innocence as the questions about her identity start stacking up and finally plunges into pure villainy as her true motives and feelings spill out. Seska’s condemnation of Janeway is so vicious it is like a slap in the face for the Captain. How glorious that this show was fronted by a female Captain and a female lead villain during its first two seasons. What a shame Mulgrew and Hackett didn’t get many opportunities to lock horns because their scenes together here sizzle. ‘You are a fool, Captain. And you’re a fool to follow her.’ Ouch. When Seska started ripping into the Federation, I practically wanted to applaud. Sometimes I worry about my anti-Federation agenda because the two characters that truly tear into the hypocrisy of the operation (Seska and Eddington) and I find myself nodding my head in agreement.

Production – Beautiful location work, realistic looking caves (dripping with water) and smart effects (the Kazon mangled into rock thanks to Starfleet technology is unforgettable); Voyager commanded an expensive look right from the off.

Best moment – This is an incredibly sharp script. Even small moments like Torres telling Janeway that when she says that she can do a job by tomorrow, she means tomorrow are right on the money. I also loved Seska taking the piss out of Chakotay’s Indian mysticism, which it turns out was a load of kablooey made up by an ‘expert’ in the field.

Seska planting evidence that she did it to point the finger at Carey is genius. What a mind.

Worst moment – Carey and Hogan. Whatever happened to them? Well one was eaten by a giant worm in the great Jeri Taylor cull of season three and the other…goodness knows. Doesn’t he show up again in season seven? Voyager was trying to pull together a distinctive secondary cast in the first two seasons, it’s a shame that that stopped.

I wish they hadn’t done that – The Kazon. Is there anybody, from their creators to the audience at large, that thinks that these Klingon wannabes were a good idea in retrospect? They get more of an opportunity to establish themselves than most Star Trek villains, spreading across three seasons with countless appearances. We do get a chance to explore their culture in some depth across a spread of episodes from their rituals, their young, their clans to their easy manipulation, power hungry leaders and in fighting and politics. I could count the effective number of appearances that they make on one hand and ultimately there is little to distinguish them from Klingons aside from their crazy hair and red faces and even then the make up job feels familiar and slighter than their counterparts. It is a shame that Voyager’s first attempt to build a race up fails so spectacularly. It means that they fall back on Trek staples like the Borg more often than not rather than populating this area of space with any races that are truly inspired. Even the Hirogen and Species 8472 fail to impress me and the less said about those Slimer wannanbes from Equinox, the better. The only race to truly fire my imagination are the Vidiians but we push out of their space in season three so that leaves five season without a solid bad guy.

I think that Jeri Taylor and I simply have a different idea of what makes good Star Trek. She was only mildly happy with this episode whereas I think it is easily a top 20 Voyager. When it comes to her opinion of individual episodes we usually diverge completely and I rate her own episodes (TNG and Voyager) as some of the poorest and the point where she had the most creative control of the series (season three) and possibly the weakest season of Trek overall, bar a few examples (TNG 1 and 7, TOS 3).

I’m baffled as to how Chakotay has grey hair in the first season and it gets considerably darker as each season progresses. I see Starfleet has its own brand of Just for Men. To be honest he looks so much more distinguished with a hint of grey.

A reason to watch this episode again – It’s worth stating this again because I often damn Voyager with faint praise (if anything I am coming to realise that despite my reservations about the show, which I still cling on to, I am enjoying it far more on a rewatch, especially as I am including TOS and Enterprise in my viewing experience) that at this point in the shows run it is a superior show to TNG, DS9 and ENT. With Caretaker, Phage, Eye of the Needle, Prime Factors, State of Flux, Faces and Jetrel, the first 15 episodes of Voyager show a great deal of promise. This might be the best of that bunch, an episode that delivers a gut punch to the Voyager crew by revealing a snake amongst the crew and revealing a venomous opinion of Janeway and her softly softly approach to getting home. It’s an episode that grows organically out of the shows central premise, sets up fascinating consequences for the future and forces a character we know and love to face betrayal, humiliation and downfall. It has a riveting plot, powerhouse character work and scorching dialogue. I cannot wax lyrical enough. A poke in the eye to anyone who might suggest that all early Voyager is bad Voyager, State of Flux just gets better with re-viewings when you know what comes later.

****1/2 out of *****

Clue for tomorrow's episode:

DS9 – Rejoined

Plot – I’m not sure I can be entirely realistic about Rejoined, which is a DS9 single episode romance, a sub-genre that has produced such gems as Meridian, A Simple Investigation and Melora. It came along during the fourth season of DS9 when the show simply rocketed into orbit and started to show up all the other Trek around it, before or since. It was at the point where I was watching TV with my now deceased mother (the only show we watched from start to finish together). It features all of the crew at their most relaxed and exposes the chemistry amongst this cast in a revealing and intimate way. And, god help me, it is a single episode romance that actually convinces you it might lead to something serious between the two lovesick puppies or that their relationship will have some serious consequences for them. Plus, it is directed by Avery Brooks, to date one of the finest directors the franchise has ever seen. As I said, I may not be realistic about how inconsequential this episode probably is to most of you but to me it owns a warm, wonderful place in my heart.

Character – Quark is a wonderful audience identification figure here because he finds the whole situation of joined Trills and their complicated pasts a bit too much to take – ‘Frankly it’s giving me a headache’ he says and that prevents ever having to hear about the byzantine details ever again. It’s a fantastically written scene because it is played fast and wittily but it delivers a huge amount of exposition.

This is a great Bashir episode too. He gets to play magician, best friend, Doctor and consul. Siddig has come on in leaps and bounds and delivers some complicated dialogue effortlessly. Season four really was his renaissance. His bored face at dinner makes me cry with laugher. I hope he’s better at poker. Bashir has a real thing for Dax so agreeing to come along as her chaperone whilst she romances somebody else is just about the most selfless thing he could do.

Performance – Terry Farrell’s best performance in Trek, bar none. Dax may have had a few better episodes scattered about her run but there is no point where Farrell gives such a considered, intimate and believable portrayal than Rejoined. She began her Trek career on uncertain terms, playing the first season like a wise old man with only the occasional flashes of the sneaky minx that was to come. From season two onwards the fun was unleashed and we got to see just how much humour and wit Farrell could bring to the role. She quickly became a fan favourite and with very good reason, Dax is simply terrific fun to be around. Rejoined flips that on its head and plunges her headlong into romantic tragedy and even more brilliantly than that it is a relationship with another woman, something that Trek has been notoriously shy about but embraces here without a second thought. Thompson and Farrell may have had a moment’s pause when it came to snogging each other’s faces off (actually it is a lot more tender than I make it sound there) but their chemistry on set is utterly believable. From the first moment they set eyes on each other I was thinking ‘oh boy, they’re in trouble’ and that isn’t because of any kind of lustful fantasy on my part (trust me on that) but because their body language and sly looks at each other suggest a deep longing for a past relationship that has never quite gone away.

Why is it that Avery Brooks generally directs himself much better than other people? What an odd situation to be in. ‘It wasn’t me giving stiff performances, guvnor, it was wot the nasty director man made me do.’ Look at him in Fascination, Rejoined, Far Beyond the Stars, The Dogs of War. He’s brilliant in all of those, thoroughly relaxed for the most part and completely at one with his part. Sisko’s relationship with Dax has never been more pronounced, and more touchingly played. It’s ably demonstrated in the scene where he gives his honest opinion about Dax’s actions and then tells her that he will support any decision she decides to make and help her deal with the fallout. That’s a true friend.

Production – Terry Farrell is a stunningly beautiful woman. How is it that Avery Brooks directs her in such a way here that she looks even more stunning beautiful? She’s radiant in this episode.

Best moment – I can’t help it. The Ferengi who goes looking in Quark’s ear after Bashir pulls some latinum out makes me laugh out loud.

Few episodes if Trek have the honour of falling under the category of controversial but Rejoined enjoys that privilege. It’s astonishing to think that such a sweet and delicate piece if television should cause such a stir. The moment in question – the kiss between two women – isn’t exploitative or overtly sexualised, it is a beautiful moment of sexuality between two people who are completely drawn to each other and lost in the past. The fact that certain channels refused to show this because of this outrageous slur against humanity is baffling, but then I guess the mid-90s was a different time. With what is plastered over our screen on Game of Thrones and Vikings and the like these days this kind of chaste romance wouldn’t even create a ripple. It’s a kiss that means something, which is a rarity in Trek and I love Dax’s reaction afterwards, steadying herself at the window as she is overwhelmed with what she is feeling.

Ultimately this comes down to a choice between accepting their feelings and defying the system or ignoring them and continuing to live their lives mourning the loss of what might have been. An unhappy choice. Trek often puts some hideous plot mechanics in the way of two people in love (again I mention Meridian) but this comes down to Lenara walking away from Dax because she is scared to face the consequences. Her speech that she doesn’t have a little Curzon inside her telling her to impulsive rings very true. Dax, holding out hope until the end, waits on the Promenade to see if Lenara will leave her and we have watch the crushing disappointment on her face when that moment comes. It’s all character choices, and that’s the most satisfying way to bring an episode to a close.

I wish they hadn’t done that – Why are these official Starfleet social gatherings so boring? Where’s the music? Does nobody get drunk? Everybody stands about in formal wear being incredibly polite to each other. How tedious.

A reason to watch this episode again – Character, character and more character…this is genuinely why I am so attracted to Trek and it is delivered with abundance in Rejoined. It also has a wealth of technobabble but I just sort of switch off when that strikes. The important thing isn’t the first artificial wormhole but the beautiful romance that blossoms between Dax and Lenara and the emotional fireworks that detonate because of it. The thinly veiled metaphor for homosexuality is pleasingly done because it manages to drive home the point without ever having to mention the fact that this a relationship between two women. What scores so highly is the polished and warm direction from Avery Brooks and the stunning performances from all involved (Susannah Thompson gives one of the best ever one-episode performances). When I get to the end of this episode, I always want to find someone to hug.

****1/2 out of *****

Clue for tomorrow's episode: 

TOS – Obsession

Plot – I love how Kirk’s logs become less of a professional report and more of a personal confession as the episode continues. It feels less like one of Picard’s ‘business as usual’ logs and more like Sisko’s In the Pale Moonlight personal therapy.

Character – It’s an old trope in television to reach into the past of a character to reveal something about them that we didn’t already know. Often it occurs early in a shows run so we can familiarise ourselves with their backstory. This is nearly halfway through TOS’ run and Kirk’s history is being flagged up and explored. It feels earnt at this point and it certainly gives the episode a weighty sense of importance. Kirk is one of the three essential regulars on this show and as far as Shatner and the writers are concerned he is the central character (as far as the audience is concerned I am convinced it is Spock) and so digging up some of his more unpleasant past actions is treated like a big deal. Shatner seizes the opportunity to be more than an action hero, this promotes him as a tortured soul and he gives his recollection of previous tragedies everything he has got. I loved his twitchy assertion that nobody gets special treatment on board the Enterprise. It is the first sign that Kirk is going off the rails. I love the moment where he snaps that he’s tired of his senior officers conspiring against him when in fact they are just doing what they always do, which is express their strong opinions. He’s particularly hard on Garrovick because he reminds him of a young James T. Kirk who also paused when faced with the gas entity and 200 people were killed. I appreciated Kirk’s assertion that intuition is an appropriate command attribute as it is a skill that has served all the Captain’s for the past 50 years.

‘I need your advice, Doctor’ ‘Then I need a drink’ might be the best ever Spock/McCoy exchange. What is so effective about both Spock and McCoy’s concern for Kirk is how that manifests. Spock tries to understand obsession and seeks advice at how to handle it whereas McCoy heads straight to the heart of the problem and gives Kirk some advice on how to handle guilt. Ultimately McCoy has the last word when it comes to the Captain’s ability to Command and when Kirk tries to threaten him he pulls that ace out to startle him. It’s very funny that Spock is waiting outside the door during that entire exchange just to come in at the right moment and back up McCoy in his desire to relieve Kirk of duty. It’s very amusing that the one thing that McCoy often uses as an insult against Spock – the fact that he has green blood – is the very thing that saves him in this episode.

Performance - All hail Leonard Nimoy and the glorious scene where Spock says that arguing over the point of whether they should have gone after the creature is academic because they have already done so, and now it is coming after them. It’s delivered with such perfect dryness I burst out laughing.

Production – You don’t need sophisticated effects to suggest that something sinister is going as TOS regularly proved. The early scenes with the smoke curling backwards, the suggestion of smells that stir up memories and the dreamy performances of the actors all contribute to create a feeling of uncertainty. It’s a shame that it has to be the redshirts that all have to die – that’s such a cliché at this point – but this is no ordinary away mission. Smoke is such a simple effect to create that the scenes where it starts pouring through the vents on the Enterprise remain startling, because of the sheer panic is drives into the characters.

I don’t know where they find these actors or if it is simply the uniform that does it but there are a shocking number of handsome redshirts that populate this series. It’s not the only reason I want to watch but it certainly doesn’t harm my enjoyment. Ensign Garrovick is a beautiful looking man and it is a shame that he should not feature in any other episodes. The performance is very strong and the character (as a surrogate young Kirk) plays an essential part in the story.

Best moment – We have encountered all manner of strange and wonderful things in space at this point. It’s come to the point where it is rather commonplace. Thanks to the expert character work that is done in the first half of this episode the moment that the gas cloud appears on the viewscreen really had me on the edge of my seat because Kirk is physically squirming at the sight of it. He’s convinced it is the same entity that killed 200 men he was serving with in the past and here it is again to haunt him.

Worst moment – It’s not a bad moment (actually the entire climax is very nicely done) but the moment when the audience realises that Garrovick is going to sacrifice his life to the cloud so that Kirk can live comes long before he gives the good Captain a Judo chop. A massive round of applause for not going down that obvious route and instead showing Kirk at his most decisive and shrewd.

I wish they hadn’t done that – What is the point of Nurse Chapel? From what I can tell she is there to hand Dr McCoy the odd piece of medical equipment, distribute some exposition and to deliver dinner when everybody is panicking. It’s hardly the most fulfilling role that a woman could have, even in the 1960s (let us remember that in Britain The Avengers was making super spies out of Cathy Gale and Emma Peel and the better Doctor Who companions like Barbara Wright, Sara Kingdom and Zoe Herriot were experts in history, security and astrophysics) and it is a far cry from the brilliantly cold and calculating Number One featured in The Cage. I feel for Majel Barrett who deserved so much more than this periphery and at times pointless role.

A reason to watch this episode again – One of the best William Shatner performances in the Original Series’ run because he has the chance to get his teeth into some dark psychological material rather than simply devouring the scenery. Obsession is an intelligent piece, dramatically executed, very nicely acted and featuring some memorable exchanges between the trio of Kirk/Spock/McCoy. Aside from the overdone music at times there are none of the hallmarks (overdone campness, ridiculous monsters, unconvincing romance) that usually embarrass about early Trek. It’s incredibly focussed, directly told and features a villain that really gets under the skin (obsession and guilt). A top ten TOS for me.

****1/2 out of *****

Clue for tomorrow's episode: 

The Orville Season One

Old Wounds written by Seth Macfarlane and directed by Jon Favreau 

Captain Cardboard: ‘The truth is you’re nobody’s first choice for this job…’ I’m going to let you in on a little secret that may or may not get me executed for mutiny…but Seth Macfarlane is one of my weird crushes. That is, he isn’t your conventionally handsome series lead but there is something about this guy that draws me to him, especially in this role where he seems both completely at home and utterly in over his head. Clearly this is a role that Macfarlane has been eyeing up ever since he headed into the TV industry (as exemplified by the super cute video that I found on YouTube of him playing the Captain in an extremely amateur production of Star Trek in his child hood – check it out, it is the most wonderful bit of ephemera you will find online today) and you wouldn’t need to ask whether he is a fan of the genre or the Trek franchise going into this show – it screams out of every frame. Macfarlane is a proven money spinner, he’s had countless successful shows and has made enough of a name for himself to be able to take on his own vanity project in The Orville and put himself as the lead and you would think this would make him the most strutting egotist of all time. Now go and watch him being interviewed about this show. This really isn’t about him stroking his ego but trying to get in touch with a feeling that he had when he was a child when storytelling possibilities in space were endless, where the exploration of the unknown was exciting and where relationships between characters kept you gripped to the television. MacFarlane genuinely wants to make a good show. He just happens to want to be the Captain too, finally living his life long dream. It adds a rather wonderful touch to the show, knowing that in his heart this producer/writer/director/actor is simply trying to re-enact those exciting times in his childhood and put himself in the heart of it. My love for him couldn’t shine anymore. Off camera, this extremely hard-working man sounds utterly relaxed, deeply respectful of his co-workers and very sure of what he wants to create. He is quite the talent. 

Even more, he recognises his own limitations as well. MacFarlane is a terrific voice actor (as Family Guy continually proves) but isn’t going to set the world alight as a dramatic actor (although I think you see him go on a journey over the two seasons with this struggle and develop a certain gravitas as the show goes on) and so he has manoeuvred some phenomenal acting talent into his main cast who can handle the heavy stuff whilst he sits in the Captain’s chair and shouts ‘Fire!’ Maybe that’s a little unfair, but when MacFarlane is indulging in relationship drama for Mercer it feels at its most sitcom, and he brings the same comic energy that he did to his animated shows. Sometimes it works beautifully, other times it falls on its face but I appreciate him taking the genre and trying to do something fresh and interesting with it. More Red Dwarf, less DS9. I really like how he refuses to make Mercer a man of legend like Captain Kirk and instead introduces him as your everyman average authority figure, a man who isn’t sure whether he has the ability to take on such an important role (and his superiors are completely baffled at Kelly’s recommendation). He’s awkward and lovestruck and tends to think with his feet rather than his brain but that merely ingratiated him to me more because it is easy to fall in love with a character who struggles at first because you are rooting for him to succeed, despite his failings. He couldn’t look more like an average Joe sitting before his commanding officer, hands in his lap like he has been called to the Principals office and sucking on a marble.

At the heart of this series is the Mercer/Kelly romance, which fuels many episodes and might determine how you take to this show. If you are invested in this pair as a couple (I am because both actors make the cliched scenario of exes forced to work together go much further that it should) then you should have no problem weaving through the soap operatics that is thrown your way over the first two seasons. If that kind of romance movie stereotype isn’t your bag, you might be completely turned off. Essentially how you react to the very first scene of The Orville might be a good litmus test for this show as it is warm, silly and utterly cliched and yet filmed and acted with such panache.

Number Two: Along with Doctor Finn, one of two adults in the command staff on The Orville. I hadn’t seen Adrianne Palicki in anything else before and had very little reason to expect much from what felt like a thankless role as Mercer’s ex-wife. She’s actually given the weightier dramatic moments on the show and delivers some exceptional work. Somebody had to be the straight man on The Orville and Kelly is often tasked with that role. Strangely enough when this very real feeling person acts as though this cast of oddballs solving SF mysteries is the most natural thing in the world I believed in it utterly. Most valued performer, by some stretch. The scene at the end where you learn that it was Kelly who recommended Mercer for this posting and made a case for him adds a lot of depth to their situation, and the show at large, and would be followed up on several times later.

Issac: Why are the non-humanoid characters always the most engaging on these shows? The best thing about Issac (beyond Mark Jackson’s surprisingly versatile performance as a walking bag of bolts) is the mystery that surrounds this character. We really don’t know much about his people at this point and that is definitely a big question mark that is explored exceptionally well in season two. He’s a brilliant comic character because he is so innocent and deadpan, but insanely he also becomes the most poignantly handled romantic character on the show too. I love his aesthetic (its mid-50s glam robot chic), Jackson’s voice has been specifically chosen to make this character this likable. Bravo on making the robot the star of the show.

Klingon Wananbe: My initial reaction to Bortus was that he looked so ridiculous that I feared he would be a figure of mockery throughout. Oh, how wrong could I be? When it comes to humour, he is the Worf character, always there with a deadpan line to cut through all the madness. But what surprised me no end was how Macfarlane (and Peter Macon) make this character so well rounded and interesting, not only as an alien species that opens up some brilliant exploration of modern day prejudices but also as a character in his own right with failings and strengths that make him the most vivid character on the crew. The fact that this is a (mostly) all male species means the show automatically has a fascinating same sex couple involved but things go much deeper than that. Through Bortus the show gets to explore prejudice, humanity, sexuality, rage. Of the entire main cast he is the one who surprised me the most.

Dazzling Doctor: Finally, a Trek show (oops, I’ve got to stop doing that) that gets the Doctor character spot on from the very start. Penny Johnson Gerald is a terrific actress and frankly I was a little surprised to see her associated with a show like this when the cast was first announced but having seen the first two series I can see precisely what attracted her to it now. This is a show where she can really let her hair down and have some fun, but also do some respectable work. Her character is a little marginalised at first but she really comes into her own in the second season and she is a reassuring presence amongst the crew at all times. Gerald is just so sassy and smart a performer that she is always watchable, no matter what they give her to do. The fact that she appeared on one of my all-time favourite shows carries no favour here (oh no). She’s a fully formed character here, we just don’t know that until they start giving her things to do.

Bevis: Gordon is the one character that I feel they struggle with the most at the beginning of the show, and it would take until the middle of season two until he beds in properly and is treated as a guy with any kind of integrity. For most of series one he is a wisecracking jackass who flies the ship and the cause of most of the jokes that come at inappropriate times.

Butthead: LaMarr is another character that fails to ignite much interest early on, but he would gain focus a lot quicker than Gordon.

Strength of Ten Men: Young, cute and very likable, thanks to her super strength we have a little touch of Buffy in this show. Halston Sage is the youngest member of this cast but she slips into the (very experienced) cast effortlessly. Her big shot is in the next episode, where she is the central character to figure but my one take away from this episode was that she was somebody I wanted to spend some more time with.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Aren’t’ you guys legendarily racist?’
‘Is that one of your projects?’ ‘No no, that’s Dr Jorvik our chief botanist.’

The Good: Anybody who thought this show would be filmed and budgeted like a sitcom (given it is often described as a dramedy) might have had the shock of their lives when the show opened on a stunning CGI vista of New York in the future complete with hoover cars, monorails and eco-buildings bursting with foliage. I was floored by the detail in the effects work throughout this episode and the series at large. For some reason I was expecting sticky backed plastic and washing up bottles but that might have something to do with the fact that the science fiction comedy I was brought up on was Red Dwarf, which certainly boasted some impressive FX but was very much a product of its time and what could be achieved on a small budget. The effects work on The Orville puts shows like Doctor Who to shame, and in some cases could certainly hold up to comparison to the other Trek shows that are being produced at the moment. It’s not just that the money is there on screen but also that, especially as the series continues, it is poured into some beautiful and imaginative sequences. But more on that later. I’m not one to get excited about starship design but The Orville itself is a thing of beauty.

The show would certainly indulge in some very un-Star Trek sexual behaviour and opening on a scene of a blue mans head bursting with cum in the opening seconds does immediately tell you that despite the trappings, this show is definitely doing its own thing. This a show that isn’t afraid to look really silly (a lot like Doctor Who actually, and very unlike Star Trek, which is probably why I find it a perfect marriage of the two worlds) and would dare to show sequences such as a woman bathing in a gelatinous blob in a depraved sexual act, faux-Klingon men having an orgy in a park and a woman and a robot making romantic gestures to each other in public. It makes my heart sing that there is a show out there that is willing to throw caution to the wind and embrace lunacy with its sexual representation, and yet to explore it with a great deal of intelligence and heart.

All the gossiping on the Bridge feels very natural to me. If I was serving on a Starship and Captain’s love life was the topic of conversation, I would be so there. The Moclans, the Union and the Krill are all established in this first episode and so in terms of universe building the three major players of this series are put on the map straight away. It certainly sets up its characters and universe with more aplomb than several of the Star Trek pilots I can think of (far better than Encounter at Farpoint and Broken Bow, not as vividly as DS9 and Voyager). The Orville has so much fun with its CGI and prosthetics creating imaginative and out there creatures that it rather puts its science fiction contempories in the shadows when it comes to exploring the diversity of life in space in a creative way. Some might call Yaphit silly, I think he’s glorious. The location work, gun play and mass make up jobs could have come from a big budget movie. The last third of the episode might devolve into action but my goodness it looks great. As a demonstration of the resources that this show has to hand, it is invaluable. Destroying the Krill ship with a redwood tree is just absurd enough to work. It’s the last thing in the world that Trek would do, which is a good starting point.

The Bad: Mercer discovering his ex is to become his XO and dashing off the bridge in a flap is nowhere near as funny as Macfarlane seems to think it is. Brian George will always be Dr Bashir’s dad. Sorry but he just is. The concept of the week is a ray that can accelerate time but the episode only has ten minutes to do anything with the idea, which is a shame because there was a great deal of potential to have a lot of fun with it. There’s some quick discussion, the Krill show up to steal it and the concept is used as a get out clause for the plot. It’s neatly written, but far too brief. It feels so condensed that it lacks any detail or engagement, except for the ‘woah, that’s cool’ application.

Result: This is not Star Trek. Well, yes it is. Or rather it aspires to be. Instead of the Federation, we have the Union. Instead of the Klingons, we have the Moclans. Instead of the Romulans, we have the Krill. The technology, the chain of command, the uniforms, the ships, the style of shooting, the music, the fact that practically the entire team on this have worked on other Star Trek shows…this resembles mid-90s Berman era Star Trek in so many ways that to try and deny it is pointless. There’s even a holodeck and a robotic officer. However, the really clever bit is that when a show presents itself as a Star Trek knock off that you go into it with certain expectations of blandness and playing it safe and then it has far more opportunity to surprise you. Present it as a comedy and you might expect even less of it. The you deliver something like About a Girl, Majority Rule, Mad Idolatry or Identity Part One and all of your expectations are shattered and the show emerges as something completely unique. A hybrid of all those good things that make Star Trek so much fun to watch (to seek out new life and new civilisations, a huge quadrant spanning drama, space battles and technical skill) and add a gorgeous cast of actors, some really fun relationship drama, lunatic humour, huge concepts and feeling that a good time is being had by all, including the viewer. It’s a dazzling mix when they get it right. Does this show come fully formed? Not quite. They have a little way to go before they get the balance of science fiction and humour right – Old Wounds is trying to establish itself a little too forcefully as an outwardly comedic show when the series at large becomes a drama, with comic overtones and there is a massive difference between the two. Having to establish a large cast, tell a story about a spanking new planet, create this universe to play in and throw in some domestics within an hour means that all of these things fall a little short. There just isn’t the time to give them all they need and across the first season each character would get much more time to shine, the show would explore some big ideas across an entire episode and the domestics would prove surprisingly funny and poignant at times. The positives I did take here was the incredible production, the watchable pace, the beautifully chosen main cast and how at its best it does marry the action and science fiction extremely well (‘of course it’s a Derek!’). I don’t think at a first glance that Old Wounds suggests much in the way of potential (because so much of this is throwaway) but it is putting the building blocks in place for a show that has ability to surprise you more than most. Flawed, but fun: 6/10

Command Performance written by Seth Macfarlane and directed by Robert Duncan McNeill 

Captain Cardboard: There is absolutely no sense of irony or humour to Ed’s reaction to Bortus having a baby. He’s surprised, he’s curious and he’s very accepting. Just as the Captain should be. The Mercer/Kelly relationship (or rather Kelly’s infidelity) is on everybody’s lips (I still maintain this kind of gossipy chitchat is far more realistic than the conversation you hear on most Trek shows…aside from DS9 perhaps where gossips Dax, Bashir, Kira and Quark were at it all the time). Their history is the emotional backbone of the show, and also the place where it finds a lot of its early humour. At this stage it isn’t particularly clever, but over time Macfarlane would find ways to explore the relationship through some very clever science fiction ideas (namely the final two episodes of season two). 

Number Two: What’s immediately clear is that when they stop sniping at each other and just talk that Macfarlane and have a terrific, relaxed chemistry.

Issac: Gets a moment to shine as Alara’s master and does some pretty snarky talking with the zookeeper. Kaylon arrogance shines through, and that’s something to keep an eye on.

Klingon Wanabe: Peter Macon is asked to do some really silly things on this show, including wear a crazy prosthetic in this episode and sit naked on an egg. Here’s the thing and pay attention because it is the key to why this show works so well. Macon is utterly committed to making this seem as normal as possible. There is no sense of irony or taking the piss in his performance. This species absolutely sits on an egg naked. That’s how The Orville gets away with some really insane ideas because it has a production team and cast who are willing to suspend their disbelief and make ideas like a gelatinous blob in engineering the most normal thing in the world. It reminds me of Doctor Who at its best. The confidence of something absurd being perfectly natural. The final scene provides this silly subplot with a real sting and guides us neatly into the next episode.

Dazzling Doctor: Dr Finn turns up with some very sage advice in the best scene in the episode, educating Alara about command and showing how she can learn from her mistakes.

Strength of Ten Men: This is Alara’s chance to show some vulnerability as she has to face her first time in command and is entirely unprepared for it. I love the way McNeill shoots her in the Captain’s chair throughout the episode; at first from below so it seems to overwhelm her and then later, once she has adjusted to her responsibilities head on as she asserts herself and makes tough choices. Halston Sage is terrific throughout, present an Alara who seems utterly in over her head but when the chips are down seems to find a confidence inside herself that gets them out of a tricky situation. She goes on more of a journey in this one episode than some Voyager characters went on in seven seasons.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Command is all about the balance between inspiring confidence in your leadership and knowing when to trust your people.’

The Good: It is very like The Orville to have a half-baked comedy sub plot in one episode that turns out to be of huge significance to both the characters involved and the series at large. Bortus sitting on his egg until it hatches might seem like an opportunity to poke fun at the idea od men of giving birth and giving us some truly bizarre imagery but the birth of Topa actually signal a dramatic moving of the goalposts of what this series can explore in the very next episode. I remember watching Command Performance and thinking I was going to struggle with this series’ comedic secondary plots, only to have the rug pulled out from underneath me completely with this.

When I first saw the Bridge sets I was a little taken aback at how apparently stagey it looks. There was definitely Original Series vibe to it. It’s so open plan with the two command officers awkwardly placed in its centre looking a little stiff. But over time I have come to absolutely love it, mostly because the directors have found dynamic ways to shoot it but also because there are lots of hidden touches that only become apparent over time (like that gorgeous window in the ceiling that means you can shoot down into it and how it is such a large open space that you can do some stylish tracking shots across it). That staircase away from the Bridge makes me laugh every time it features. I am so used to characters being whisked away on Starships in lifts that to see characters having to scale a flight of stairs to get to Command is very funny. One poor guy is thrown from the stairs when the shuttle explodes in this episode, so it shows that heading to the Bridge can be a hazardous affair. With Engineering in pieces and the Infirmary a bustling place of wounded officers, The Orville feels far more like a functioning ship than it did in the pilot.

On Star Trek if you disobey a direct order from an Admiral it is almost treated with grudging respect with relatively little fallout. The bureaucrats of the Union feel much less forgiving, and the consequences more severe. I like that. Especially when they are being played by A grade actors like Ron Canada, Victor Garber and Ted Danson.

I was extremely impressed by the visuals that this episode commanded, especially when the second episode of a series is usually a money saver after the generally expensive pilot. Look out the window in the cell that Ed and Kelly find themselves in and you will be treated to a stunning skyline of skyscrapers and hover cars. Even better is the beautifully executed sequence where the camera pulls back to reveal that they are in a prison (or rather zoo) of epic proportions. Until that point, I was enjoying the episode whilst thinking it was nothing to write home about but that shot really made me sit up and pay attention. It’s a great twist and an impressive visual. The bizarre juxtaposition of Kelly and Ed going about their breakfast routine in their old quarters framed by the aliens wandering past and the cells opposite theirs is more quirky and memorable imagery.

The episode saves its best gag for the end as the zookeepers are introduced to the horror of reality television and consider it the best exhibit they have ever had.

The Bad: I was dying in cushion at Ed’s parents turning up on the viewscreen with their crazy comedy antics and wondering if the sub-par silliness of this show was going to bomb it for me…when this turned out to be a huge ruse and a way of luring Ed off the ship. Again, I was completely blindsided. I don’t know if that means Macfarlane is a half-arsed writer or a writer with the ability to subvert the expectations of those who come to his work thinking they know what he is going to deliver. Because these early scenes are both tragic and extremely smart.

Result: An awkward and somewhat unamusing first half leads into a pretty engaging and promising climax, making this a second episode that appears to confirm your worst fears about the pilot before whipping the series in an impressive direction. Command Performance is a winner overall because it provides a lovely character study of Alara, sets in place some essential backstory of the series (Bortus’ child) and features some fantastic scenes in the alien zoo that take a crazy concept and make it very believable. Robert Duncan McNeill seems so much more comfortable directing action than he does humour and some painful sequences in the first ten minutes aside, this is a stylishly executed piece with the money plastered all over the screen for everyone to see. Every beat of Alar’s story is predictable; the doubts, the bad decisions, losing the respect of the crew and then gaining it again when she disobeys orders but what salvages the story is the attractive performance of Halston Sage, who makes this journey into command one worth going on. Much like the first episode, this is incredible fun to watch. Unlike the first episode it has a lot more heart to it that makes it more worthwhile: 7/10

About a Girl written by Seth Macfarlane and directed by Brannon Braga 

Captain Cardboard: Macfarlane gets his first truly serious scene when he refuses to order Finn to commit to the sex change procedure and he acquits himself very well. Funny how commanding he can be when he isn’t dicking about all the time. There’s a terrific moment when Mercer says it is easy to judge another culture just because it is an alien one – that’s something that this episode had to say because the Moclan culture is so profoundly different to our own – and I’m glad it came from the top. 

Klingon Wanabe: It’s a huge stretch to ask an audience to empathise with a character that wants to take a perfectly healthy baby and mutilate it in order to conform to societies rules and for at least fifteen minutes of this hour to be stalwart and morally right to do so. The journey that Bortus goes on here is huge, taking his long held beliefs and showing that exposure to another culture can have a profound effect on not only his own identity and position but also how he views his own culture. Whilst he is willing to listen to everybody’s advice, ultimately Bortus wants to decide what is right for his child. He shows himself to be a man of great integrity by refusing to walk away from his husband and child at the end of the episode, despite the fact that things do not go his way. He has made a promise to both of them and he intends to keep it. Like Alara in the previous episode, it is more development than I have seen some characters undergo in entire seasons of their respective shows and this is just the beginning for Bortus. The most absurd looking character on this show is going to be beautifully rendered by the end of the second season, and the character that I most look forward to spending time with because of his complexity.

Dazzling Doctor: The first sign that Yaphid has a crush a on Finn, which comes into play in a big way later in the season. I should be way above the sequence where the gelatinous blob creates a tentacle to seduce the good Doctor promising ‘there’s more where that came from’ but I’m just not. Finn refuses to perform a sex change on a perfectly healthy baby girl, which is an interesting stance for her to take because morally speaking in human terms that is a perfectly reasonable argument to take but to a Moclan it is potentially the greatest insult to their society. When flying through space and mixing with other species, whose moral position do you take? She pulls the Union card and refuses the operation, firmly and respectfully.

Bevis: The fact that Malloy is put on the stand to expose the falsehood in the argument for male intellectual superiority is a terrific joke at his expense.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Why not just let the kid decide for herself when she’s old enough?’ is Mercer’s stance and a very worthy and considerate one. It is exactly what transgender individuals are fighting for in present times, the right to be who they want to be. It’s a pleasing position for the human characters in this series to take.

The Good: There is so much to unpick in this episode that I am not sure where to begin. Firstly, it is fascinating that any show should promote an all-male society where mixed gender relationships are considered an abomination. It means that gay relationships are celebrated first and foremost and that just isn’t something that is expected on mainstream television. Follow that up with the concept of women being marginalised and mistreated in society and having to exist in secret and have no impact whatsoever and you have a smart subtext of female liberation and emancipation taking place in the dark underbelly of this society. The fact that we later learn that there are far more women about than we ever thought is shocking, and that the majority of them have undergone a procedure to turn them into men and force to conform with society is a provocative. Even more intelligence is the notion of an individual having the right to hold onto the gender that they were born with, making this a study of trans rights but in reverse. This isn’t individuals fighting for the right to change their gender because they weren’t born in the one that feels right but rather claiming the original gender identity that you are born with. Promoting homosexuality, a sly investigation of women’s rights and subtle but poignant trans allegory all rolled into one. If anybody thought that The Orville wasn’t going to have anything profound to say might have been shocked by this episode. I’m not sure that it has been refined to the point where Macfarlane knows how to juggle these huge issues with any great finesse, but there is latent drama in all three of these ideas and About a Girl reveals interesting shades of them all. The episode throws in some fascinating curveballs; halfway through Bortus and Klyden are suddenly on opposing sides of the argument and Klyden reveals that he was born a female, which gives it a whole new perspective. This is somebody who has been given a chance in their society because of the procedure and highlights how the procedure can actually be a positive thing for an individual. The discovery of the female hermit living in the caves of Moclus opens out the story again, showing that some females do survive (and in their own discreet way, prosper). It is a brilliant performance from Rena Owen, dignified and unoppressed and she makes a compelling argument in her manner alone for the existence of females in Moclan society. Over the first two seasons it becomes very clear that human and Moclan societies are morally incompatible and things get ever more complex and conflicting. This is the first step in painting this society in deep, complex colours and I never thought I would say that about species on this particular show. Bravo. As a side note, the explosive and industrialised surface of Moclus is beautifully rendered in CGI. As ever, The Orville commands the finest effects work.

Three men playing cowboy in a simulator is achieved with more potency in five minutes in this episode than TNG achieved in 45 minutes in TNG. Braga directs the genre spot on; insisting on a location with wide open spaces to shoot and knocking it out of the park with an incredible crane shot that stretches the entire length of a building nestled with shooters. The Great Western Dance Off to Girls Just Wanna Have Fun is probably the weirdest and most irreverent gag yet…and also the most successful to date. It exposes the truly silly nature of this show.

The Orville’s version of Ten Forward is both a lot less atmospheric (it is brightly lit and lacks the same ambience) and yet far more believable as an area where the crew would have downtime (because it is far more populated than Ten Forward ever was). These people are drinking real alcohol and getting pissed, which I’m sure would be much needed in space.

Result: ‘You want to perform a transgender operation on a baby?’ is at the heart of About a Girl, a poignant and relevant episode that proves that The Orville has a great deal potential to make you think as much as it does fill your day with dick jokes. Indeed, this is quite the reverse, turning male and female sexuality and identity into a controversial and inflammatory subject. This is like one of those Star Trek issue shows but tackled with a lightness of touch that makes the episode extremely watchable and surprisingly impactful. The ideas it plays with sneak up on you and force you to question your own beliefs, whilst always keeping you aware that this is an alien culture that is being discussed. Whilst he was writing all those weird science and shallow action episodes of Voyager and Enterprise who knew that Brannon Braga had these kinds of directorial chops to bring to life such a thought-provoking piece of work? He does some sterling work behind the camera here and it is easy to see why he found it so challenging. There is a fine line between absurd and profound here and he judges it just about perfectly. The sequence where Bortus watches the Christmas movie and comes to the realisation that a ‘deformity’ can be an advantage is the ultimate expression of that divide and it is one of the best moments in the episode. Macfarlane’s script is perfunctory in its plotting but extremely adept at giving everybody a voice and an opinion, and having them collide to create real drama. Macfarlane is smart enough to realise that Palicki has stronger dramatic acting chops and leaves her to tackle the potentially dreary but ultimately thrilling courtroom scenes with some powerful and hard-hitting dialogue. The ending surprises in being the complete opposite of what we might expect from a Star Trek episode (it is still impossible not to make comparisons) in that the baby does undergo the procedure and Bortus makes a sensible choice to do his best as a parent despite things not turning out how he (or the audience) wanted. It’s bittersweet, albeit it leaves a seed of hope for the future of Moclan society that people are starting to question their long-held beliefs. It shows there are no easy answers and change takes time. The more I think about it, the more impressed I am with About a Girl. The performances are universally excellent: 8/10

If the Stars Should Appear written by Seth Macfarlane and directed by James L. Conway

Captain Cardboard: I love how desperately average Macfarlane is willing to make Mercer seem (the scene where he tries to work out the 24 hour clock on his hand made me laugh out loud) and yet thanks to the missions that transpire and his quick thinking and delicate touch, he is so much more than that. He deliberately goes out of his way to show that this is just an average Joe in his outlook and then puts him in situations where he has to be more than that. After hurting Kelly, there was no way that Hamelec was going to escape this episode without some kind of reprisal from Mercer. I think he needs to work on his diplomacy a little. Shooting the guy in power might be seen as an aggressive act. 

Number Two: I really liked Kelly’s refusal to be cowled even after she has been beaten and threatened with death. Her riposte that she has been through a divorce and so this physical torture is nothing made me stifle a giggle.

Issac: Mercer has to double check that Issac didn’t kill the local when he reacts with rapid fire speed to save his Captain from being blown in two. There is so much that they still don’t understand about the Kaylons.

Klingon Wanabe: How revolutionary is it to have a mainstream show like The Orville feature two men talking about their (lack of) sex life in the opening scene as though that kind of scene is the most natural thing in the world? The continuing marital and domestic issues between Bortus and Klyden (the most outwardly straightforward couple and family situation on The Orville) is one that runs through the first two seasons and has some surprising depth at points. This is a relationship of two people that have fallen in love but have made their home on a ship where one half of the couple is open to cultural contamination and the other isolates himself from it completely. Their opposing points of view often causes sparks to fly in their quarters.

Dazzling Doctor: Yaphit asking Finn if she would be interested in coming to his quarters and getting weird and sloppy some night is just about the most disgusting offer that you could possibly imagine…but to his species it is probably the highest compliment.

Bevis: Malloy and LaMarr are still gossiping about Mercer and Grayson’s relationship on the Bridge and I’m sorry but this is perfectly natural workplace gossip. Trek seems to suggest that there would be cultural conversation between colleagues in the future, but The Orville insists (and far more realistically in my book) that it would be all snark.

Strength of Ten Men: ‘You want to open this jar of pickles for me’ is what Mercer says to Alara every time he needs her to use her incredible strength to rip open a door or perform some act of destruction to get them out of danger. This is a line that is playing a long game, because the pay off in the second season was so good that it brought tears to my eyes. Alara’s hopeless love life is brought up here and is running joke until her departure from the series. It’s quite sad that she cannot find somebody who can handle her superior strength and agility. That says a lot about the men who serve on board The Orville.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘We don’t mean your family any harm’ ‘Well we did just shoot his dad…’

The Good: The Orville is one of those shows on air at the moment that tries to impress with its sense of wonder, rather than by shoving gratuitous sex, violence and profanity in your face to show how edgy it is. In that was this is a throwback to the 90s and the sort of thing that Trek was doing back then. Making the exploration of space an exciting one where the possibilities for storytelling are endless. Coming across the ship that makes The Orville look like a speck of dirt on its hull certainly qualifies and the pullback CGI to reveal the ship is exactly the sort of top dollar effects work that this show commands that shows like TNG could not achieve back in the day. Marry Trek’s flagship shows sense of awe at the universe with The Orville’s expensive production values and you have the best of both worlds. An enormous ship, 2000 years old and drifting through space into danger…this is the first real scientific find that The Orville has stumbled across and investigated. You have a director who brings the ship to life with an incredible sense of wonder and a musician who is totally on board with creating a sense of awe with the score. The most spectacular visual comes not when the crew are investigating the ship as a huge industrial construct (although the sense of scale is impressive) but when they discover the beautiful outdoors landscape with a roof. It’s the biggest bioship that anyone has ever seen and it is brought to life with cinematic aptitude.

There was a moment that completely took me by surprise. After discovering the bio dome and meeting the natives the show very quickly falls back into its perfunctory reliance on quick witted one liners and I thought we were in for a smart talking and sassy hour where the regulars run rings around the daft natives. And then one of them pumps Alara full of lead at point blank range whilst she is trying to witty and the tone of the show is completely shook. This is clever stuff, lulling you into a false sense of security by aping what has come before and then pulling the rug out from underneath you suddenly.

The Bad: I wouldn’t want to be watching this show with anybody else during LeMarr’s ‘Boom Bitch!’ moment. We don’t spend nearly enough time with the characters on the ship for them to be fully characterised. They are stereotypes, serving a plot and little more. Frankly they are pretty thankless roles for the actors. The climax features Liam Neeson turning up as Doral to explain away the plot and tie up the loose ends in a very quick speech. Do writers still rely on info dumps like that? It’s a very unsatisfying way of putting a bow around the narrative. Show, don’t tell. I think Macfarlane was hoping the shock of seeing a big name like Neeson in such a small role would smooth over the rough edges of this plot. The answers are decent, I just don’t think the way they are delivered is. The huge implications of a society being re-acquainted with the fact that they are on a spaceship is entirely skipped over once the plot is over and done with and I hope that there are consequences to all of this in the future. It would be great to catch up with this ship again and see how this society turned out after dealing with a traumatic shift in their worldview. An optimistic vision of the future is what this episode is going for for these people but I think it will be a lot more difficult than that.

Result: Probably the episode that feels closest in tone to your average Trek mystery from the mid-90s, but with state-of-the-art effects and some lovely character moments that make this uniquely The Orville. James L. Conway directed some of the very best Star Trek episodes (Frame of Mind, Duet, Necessary Evil, Way of the Warrior) and is uniquely qualified to bring this kind of puzzle to life. What we have here is a beautifully produced piece of television juggling some old ideas (the idea of science versus religion, the enormous spaceship with a bio dome) in an entertaining fashion. Because The Orville wants to please you more than touch an intellectual nerve I’m sure that these ideas are handled in as worthy a fashion as Trek would but some shocking moments (Alara getting shot, the criminal that is beaten to death) make sure that you stay alert. Later in the season the show would attack its concepts far more chillingly (Majority Rule and Mad Idolatry in particular) but as a first attempt to delve into some real science fiction ideas this is not a bad try. I like the serious threat that runs through this story, it proves that The Orville can ditch the comedy and put its characters in real danger when the situation warrants. Marrying the comedy and the threat is a tough juggling act and I don’t think they have quite gotten the balance right yet but this episode does have moments that are amusing and moments that made me wince with horror. Some television makes me feel nothing at all so to achieve both of those is impressive. Tighter storytelling is needed, but I found this an above average instalment with enough happening to keep my interest: 7/10

Pria written by Seth MacFarlane and directed by Jonathan Frakes

Captain Cardboard: Does Ed come across as a little starry eyed in the face of Pria and her apparent interest in him? Yes. Does Kelly come across as insanely jealous of this woman and the effect she is clearly having on her ex? Yes. Does this bring their relationship back to the fore in a very significant way? Yes. I wouldn’t say it is especially smart characterisation of the leads (in fact it is a little too obvious in parts) but how Pria plays on their feelings (she is deliberately whipping them up into a storm) to distract them to her true intentions is very clever. 

Number Two: As Pria and Mercer share similarities about their lives, note Kelly’s awkwardness and jealousness that Adrianne Palicki underplays beautifully whilst letting the audience know of her discomfort. I rather like the fact that Kelly’s instincts are the correct ones but because she pushes so hard (and has such history with Ed) that she comes across as the green-eyed ex who can’t handle another woman in his life. Because she is correct in her assertion, this characterisation of Kelly is entirely salvaged. The Kelly/Pria catfight makes the episode worth watching alone. Man, I love it when two women have a scrap and it gets this nasty.

Bevis: Malloy finally has a line that is genuinely funny without pushing the comedy too far; ‘Captain I respectfully suggest that the attractiveness of the ships occupant makes the rescue attempt imperative.’

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Nice sucker punch, but I’d expect that from someone who cheats on her husband’ ‘You told her?’ ‘No! She’s from the future!’ ‘But it’s in the past’ ‘I told her.’

The Good: This is one of those episodes where there is an A and a B plot existing side by side and it depends on your point of view which of these that you prefer. For me I think the B plot where Issac tries to learn about humour trumps the day simply because it has the most amusing twist and turns along the way. Opening on a scene where he tries to get his head around some sick black comedy (he calls it sadism) from a television comedy leads to one of the best gags in the entire series when he amputates Malloy’s leg in order to get a laugh. You’d think that doing that would be highly inappropriate and insulting to people who live with those conditions and it would be if it weren’t committed by Issac, who is a machine and does it with the literal motive of getting a laugh in the most unsuitable of ways. Issac coming to the Bridge wearing Mr Potato Head pieces on his face should be the most miserable of jokes but it genuinely hits the funny bone because the robot completely fails to see why it is either funny or embarrassing (and he looks so god damn funny). Malloy challenges Issac to get him when he least suspects it and be creative. Oh boy.

Not being much of a movie buff, I don’t really have much of a handle on the prominence of Charlize Theron and I have certainly never seen her in anything before but I am aware that she is enough of a big name to make some headlines for appearing in something as quaint as The Orville after a fairly prestigious list of credits. Certainly, the episode is aware of her importance to, since the cold open ends abruptly once she is revealed as the damsel in distress in the ship facing imminent destruction. At first I found it a little worrying that all everybody treats Pria as is a something to lust after or to be jealous of, like she is an attractive woman first and a capable officer second. In that respect it felt very TOS. However, this is something plays on to her advantage and does nothing to discourage because it allows her complete her real mission. Because the reveal about her character is so huge, it allows you to see those scenes from a completely different POV on a second viewing. She’s smartly using sexuality as a smokescreen to hide her true intent. The twist that Pria has comes from the future and has deliberately changed the course of history to her advantage comes completely out of left field, whilst never contradicting what we have seen. She’s a dealer who deals in artefacts in mint condition and so it was the ship that she was interested in rather than the crew.

The escape from the gravity of the collapsing star proves to be an extremely dynamic and attention-grabbing action sequence. This is just a throwaway moment of danger on The Orville’s part and there would certainly be more riveting space effects in the coming episodes but this just goes to show the level of cinematic dynamism the this show commands. There’s certainly nothing about Pria’s rescue that feels like a set-up, which is the very idea that she was going for. Keep an eye out for the incredible effects shot where the ‘camera’ swoops in on the ship and pans across several windows (where you can briefly see the activities of the crew) before swooping inside the window of the cocktail party. The Orville versus bubbles in space should be absurd but not only does it look visually striking but the affect these phenomena have on the ship is considerable.

Result: If the continuing relationship difficulties between Ed and Kelly are your thing then throwing Charlize Theron into the mix is only going to add to your enjoyment of the show. If you like an action show with plenty of pleasing space effects then you’re in even more luck. Pria is the episode that gets the drama and humour balance just about right whilst having an underlining mystery about who Pria is and what her real motive is for being aboard The Orville. This is one of those rare episodes of science fiction where the answer to the mystery is actually way more satisfying than the how that mystery is presented. Usually these stories all come down to the suspense of the puzzle that has been playing out but this time that is watered down by the sitcom antics of Ed and Kelly so when the revelation of who Pria is is revealed it comes as a complete surprise. There is a brilliant b story here, featuring Malloy attempting to teach Isaac about humour and it completely biting him in the ass (or the leg) where the gags really hit home for the first time on this show. ‘Haha, I got you’ has never prompted such a sick laugh from me. Pria is a successful episode that never quite achieves full orbit because it fails to provide any serious drama that the best episodes of The Orville achieve. If you skip ahead to instalments like Lasting Impressions and Sanctuary in season two and you will see how well they have mastered this kind of thing by then. On a scene by scene basis, this works well. The show is still learning how to walk at the moment but as a diversion this ticks all the right boxes. The last scene is very clever: 7/10

Krill written by David A. Goodman and directed by Jon Cassar 

Captain Cardboard: I used to love it when Admiral Necheyev came aboard the Enterprise and grabbed Picard by the bollocks. It’s interesting to see that Mercer is treated with a great deal more respect by his superiors, especially now his mission (which was doubted by many) is turning out to be quite the success story. To have secured a Krill shuttle for study and espionage is quite the feather in his cap. Perhaps that faith in him is misguided, as his spy techniques are basically to walk onto the Krill ship without having studied their method of behaviour and to wing it. It wouldn’t be hard to spot which two Krill on the ship could potentially by human agents. Mercer shows himself to be a man of character, dashing to save the children before taking out the rest of the Krill crew. In an unexpected moment of drama he realises he has saved a group of children who will grow up knowing that he executed their family. 

Issac: He’s fascinated by the relationships between humans and is happy to attempt sexual relations with Alara if it would ease the pain of her recent breakup. It’s nice to see this raised here (albeit unsubtly) because it is sowing the seeds for Issac’s relationship with Dr Finn.

Klingon Wanabe: I was wondering how far they would take the ‘Bortus can eat anything’ joke and having him chow down on a cactus and a glass is pretty funny.

Bevis: The best Malloy gag to date comes when he is transformed to look like a Krill and he pretends to be an armed stowaway with Mercer as a hostage. And it pleases me massively to see The Orville avoiding the ‘surgically altered’ approach and going for the ‘miniature hologram’ notion instead. It always worried me that any species could be changed into any other species on Star Trek. I always had more questions about that procedure in the episodes in question that could ever justify its use as a creative exercise.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Attention Krill ship! This is the USS Orville. Cease fire immediately or we will respond’ ‘In the history of space battles, has that ever worked?’ ‘They have ceased firing on the planet’ ‘I stand corrected.’
‘Shall we tell them their God is a 20th Century car rental company?’ and ‘Oh wise and powerful Avis, cover the loss of our vehicle!’

The Good: The series continues to chart the relationship between the Union and the Krill, who have essentially this series’ Klingons to this point (a black and white bad guy race with a penchant for violence) but this episode serves to add a lot of colour and detail to a race that has otherwise been reduced to militaristic heavies. We needed an episode like this that got us behind enemy lines and gives us a chance to examine their culture in more detail. Until now we haven’t even been entirely sure if they even have much of a culture, and what we learn is that it has some surprising parallels with our own. Krill studies their religion, their political hierarchy, their education system and their technology. I loved the moment when the religious ceremony suddenly turned blacker than black and a severed human head was revealed and stabbed repeatedly by the worshippers. It isn’t subtle but it shows how the hatred of human beings is driven into this race at every level, and especially such a visceral level during their religious ceremonies. In a moment that drops the humour like a stone, Mercer realises that the Krill ship they are going to blow up has classrooms full of children. Suddenly what felt like a heroic gesture transforms into infanticide and an obscene act. Koja is the most interesting character, because he is a young Krill who asks questions about humanity because he is curious to learn about them. If you can ignite that curiosity in just one child then maybe that will encourage others and you will have a social revolution on your hands. On the other hand, if you expose that child to violence and murder at your hands, you are confirming the dogma that his people are trying to breed within their young. That’s the most powerful message this episode promotes – Mercer has taken the inquisitiveness of one child and twisted it to hate by exposing him to violence, whatever the motive. The sunlight streaming onto the ship and burning all the Krill to death is surprisingly graphic and shocking.

The Bad: I was worried that this entire episode was going to be played for laughs, which would rather have muted the idea of getting close to the Krill and seeing what makes them tick. The first ten minutes when Mercer and Malloy are on the Krill ship is pretty awkwardly scripted and acted, with both ‘human’ actors doing very little to try and fit in.

Result: A necessary but not entirely successful episode that nevertheless has a great deal of worth to it for giving us a much closer view of Krill culture and some motivation for their hatred of humans. Where the episode loses points is in its design elements (both the design of the Krill make up and their ship is pretty bog standard) and its humour. This is perhaps one episode that should have been played straight and in the second season I believe it would have. What you have is a script that is trying to add depth to this universe but it is rubbing shoulders with the sort of comedy that makes it feel far to insubstantial. All the actors playing the Krill characters are giving this the weight that they think it deserves but MacFarlane and Grimes pratfall around the ship as though they are on a jolly. There’s added excitement in the second half when it turns out that Mercer’s mission is fortuitously timed since he has arrived during preparations for a Krill terror attack that he has to foil. As soon as that is revealed, Krill skips into high gear and the final 15 minutes are some of the best material yet in the series. I especially liked the comment that the motive of the mission was to brook peace between humans and Krill and ultimately they will commit mass murder instead. It’s the power of those final scenes that gives this episode its sting, especially when you realise that the one Krill that Mercer has found some common ground with will now take their actions and poison the minds of the Krill young with the destructive consequences of their mission. The Orville is finding its way here, trying to make a profound statement about making violent moves with the best of intentions and the fact that this episode made me wince at the climax at how Mercer’s mission has poisoned relations between humans and Krill even further revealed that I was invested in how this plays out. Now to just tone down the awkward sitcom antics and allow an episode to have appropriate weight throughout. Going from schoolboy absurdity to a graphic massacre is pretty jarring. The Orville needs to trust that it can be a drama first and a comedy second, rather than the latter intruding on the former. I’d say it is the next episode is where that mix is perfected: 7/10

Majority Rule written by Seth Macfarlane and directed by Tucker Gates 

Butthead: This is the breakout episode for LaMarr that I have been waiting for where he is much more than just a sidekick for Malloy but a person in how own right in an impossible situation (of his own making) and has to think on his feet to try and get himself out of it. I think this where the idiot ends (desecrating a statue of another situation) and the Chief Engineer that is to come begins. As a result of this episode he is just that little bit more aware of his actions, and his goofiness. In season two he emerges as a fully fleshed out character that can contribute dramatically to this show. When LaMarr has to head onto a chat show and try and clear his name I had my head in my hands. How could this guy with the smartest mouth this side of the quadrant possibly do anything but make the situation worse? 

Strength of Ten Men: It’s great that Alara’s hopeless love life has already been seeded into the series and that it is that which is the catalyst to LaMarr’s criminal act. That’s smart character foreshadowing. There’s a brilliantly tense moment when Alara is spotlighted as a wearing religious hat and they have to quickly improvise a way out of it before she is filmed and downvoted. It shows how quickly one person’s opinion can gain sympathy and spiral into mob opinion. It touches on cultural appropriation in quite an interesting way too.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘The Feed is understandably not happy about it…’
‘Are you telling me this is their legal process?’ asks Mercer about a chat show.
‘Everybody deserves a voice, that’s what we’re taught’ ‘A voice should be earned, not given away’
‘I believe you are confusing opinion with knowledge’ ‘I think what he is asking is with so many voices at once, how do you filter out the truth?’ ‘Well my Dad always says the majority are the truth. You always know what the majority wants. That’s what matters.’ ‘Well you always know what the mob wants too.’

The Good: There is something truly frightening about a society that lives with such a simple but devastating social media voting system. You either vote somebody up or you vote them down and their status depends entirely on what the majority thinks of their actions. It affects politicians, TV stars, anchors, and even the regular man on the street if you are caught doing something you shouldn’t. It means the people in control of the media are the ones with the ability to make or break people. Depending on how they portray you and your actions depends on your status in society. Stop and think about that for a moment. The media in control of everything. Petrifying. And when the outcome of somebody’s career can be boiled down to a member of the voting public thinking ‘he looks kinda shady’ and voting them down, we get to see just how uniformed this voting system. Brilliantly, our point of view character in this episode isn’t even particularly likable and she has been indoctrinated into this society at a level where she is very personal with people that she considers too low a number to be associated with. Lysella is an advocate for this system and demonstrates brilliantly the ignorance of the populace of this planet, thinking they are smart and knowledgeable and making the right choices for people. When questioned about why she votes up or down she brings a scary answer to the table - ‘majority rule.’ That’s more like mob rule. She’s not a morally corrupt character, or any moreso than everybody on their IPhones damning people online. She’s one of a herd, manipulated and powerful as a group. She needs an education on how her thoughtless actions have consequences. ‘The Feed’ is a chilling term for majority opinion. ‘Pacifying’ negative impulse is even more frightening. How they give these things such gentle names is one example of how the populace can be convinced that something evil can be twisted into something lawful. When Lysella walks in on Finn and Alara trying to cover up her heritage, that is when the cultural contamination really begins. Or rather ‘oh shit.’ The race against time to save LaMarr at the climax by introducing sympathetic memes into the Feed about him is brilliantly done. We’ve already seen the effect of the cleansing and so the stakes are high to get their crewman to be liked by this world. Lysella contributing to his freedom justifies the story’s focus on her since she genuinely impacts the narrative rather than simply being the focus character on this world. The last scene is brilliant because it doesn’t offer a sweeping reform of this planet but rather hope that things can be better. If one person like Lysella can turn her television off rather than voting then there is the potential for that to happen across this world. I hope we can revisit one day to see just what kind of impact Mercer and his crew have had.

It needs to be said that The Orville (or rather MacFarlane) attracts some seriously high-level talent to play its bit part characters. Victor Garber, Ron Canada, Ted Danson, Liam Neeson. It’s a wonderful quirk of this show that these actors are willing to come in and add a little celebrity colour to this universe with a couple of days work.

The Bad: I suppose the only thing you really have to try and get over in this episode is that this is another planet in the universe where everybody looks like humanity and the world is a spitting image of the Earth 100s of years ago. Macfarlane does give this a token explanation which works in the moment and allows us a way into the story and the planet HAS to look like Earth now in order to deliver its damning blow on majority rule…but it is very unusual just how many planets run on a parallel timeline to the Earth. I think Star trek the Original Series attempted to grapple with the idea once. The Orville could do itself a favour by thinking up a really creative reason why and blowing our minds in a future episode. Then we could have as many parodies as Macfarlane wants to tell and there would be no creative objections on that front.

Result: ‘Government by American Idol…’ Social media and the media in general gets a scathing parody in Majority Rule, my personal favourite episode of the first season. It’s a high concept show that has real dramatic legs but it also leaves room for some excellent comedy, which is a hallmark of this show. Ever joined the hordes on Twitter or Facebook and given damning criticism to somebody? That’s basically how this civilisation is set up; with a voting system that can destroy people and an ignorant audience making choices that have far consequences for those in the spotlight. It’s putting power in the hands of people who can be easily manipulated but think they are making all of their own choices. Macfarlane has jumped aboard a fascinating train here and took me on a ride that really made me think about how much of our world is constructed by those in charge, how our opinions are constructed out of the information we are fed and how we can be made to change our minds if enough of our peers are swinging in the other direction. It’s very smart television, this. People are reduced to a number determined by the opinions of others and that number indicates what you are worth in society. A bit like ‘likes’ and ‘followers’. What I especially like is how entertaining the whole piece is. Black Mirror has taken several blows at social media but those episodes, whilst excellent, are sometimes painfully uncomfortable to watch. In contrast Majority Rule is gloriously watchable, sunny and optimistic. It prods as far beneath the surface of this society as we need to go, has some damning dialogue about our own uninformed opinions online and then leaves this society in a much more positive place. Walking the tightrope of being thought-provoking and hugely enjoyable is difficult but Macfarlane makes it look effortless. If you wanted to show somebody a first season episode of The Orville to see what all the fuss is about, make it this one. Excellent direction too: 9/10