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Tuesday, 27 September 2011

Season Twenty

After her abrupt departure at the end of the last season (yay!) Tegan rejoins (boo!) and we lose Nyssa (boo!) and gain Turlough (yay!). The fifth Doctor comes against Omega, the Mara, the sinister Mawdryn, the Corporation, pirates, the Master and all many of old enemies in the Death Zone!

The regulars -

















Arc of Infinity written by Johnny Byrne and directed by Ron Jones

This story in a nutshell: Omega wants to cross the bridge between his universe and ours with the help of the Doctor's body, a gaggle of Australians, a Time Lord traitor and a giant chicken...

Open Honest Face: I know that the fifth Doctor is supposed to be a genial, agreeable sort of chap who faces his adventures with a pleasant open face (TM Terrance Dicks) but come on. He is recalled to Gallifrey and told that he is going to be executed for something that wasn’t even his fault and he accepts his fate with little care. The Doctor claims he has a great deal to say about the matter but never quite manages to make his defence and resignedly heads to his execution as though he’s actually a little bored of this body after all (in adventures like this who can blame him?). Even if he did know that his mysterious benefactor was going to save him you would at least expect him to put on some sort of show of defiance. The sixth Doctor would have railed and kicked the shit out of half of the High Council before being dragged to his death…there's nothing wrong with a little theatre to pass the time, you know. Davison is just…bland. It’s a complaint that I have levelled at his Doctor on many occasions and have (in recent years) felt necessary to retract but I still find most of his input in his second year hugely unmemorable. Guess what he and Nyssa do for fun now they have finally got rid of Tegan? Not visit the Great Exhibition or the Pyramids or the Singing Sands of Anangonia…nope they do some TARDIS repairs. Perhaps it wasn't the best idea to feature solely these two characters if this is the best Byrne/Saward can come up with. Before his execution he is shot in the chest and yet incomprehensibly he is still remarkably civil and polite to the man who gunned him down. Grow some balls man! In episode three he is subjected to the indignity of the wibbly wobbly floaty Matrix. The dullard even disapproves with Nyssa’s penchant for evasive action (i.e. grabbing a gun and shooting everybody). The fifth Doctor looks quietly hurt by Hedin’s betrayal whereas Sixie would have lamped him (and probably saved his life as a result). This is not a relationship we can buy into because it isn't one that we have ever heard of before so it has little impact. Imagine if it had been Borusa who was the traitor...surely no writer would go as far as that. The Doctor finally shows his teeth…but to Nyssa! ‘Wait in the TARDIS!’ he screams. Yeah, nice one Doctor, bully your only friend. Davison looks as though he is having much more fun as Omega; marching about in grand robes, smiling at the thought of beating up a gardener, discovering the beauty of music and sharing a tender moment with a little boy. My favourite moment comes at the end of the story where the Doctor discovers Tegan has lost her job and he will be stuck with her, he grins half-heartedly and then when he thinks the scene has ended and Tegan is no longer watching him his face drops and he looks utterly horrified. That's the genuine reaction of both the Doctor and Davison. 

Alien Orphan: Sarah Sutton is wasted on this show. She’s by far the most able and accomplished actor in this piece and she is forced to recite boring technobabble like she is reciting a Shakespearean sonnet. Frankly she is the only person giving the Gallifrey scenes some oomph, caressing the case that holds the stasers, shooting down guards a aplenty and holding the High Council at gunpoint and arguing the Doctor’s case. I love the way she spits out the line ‘So much for your justice!’ and she even takes on the dastardly Castellan with, ‘It’s a pity you weren’t so concerned when the Doctor was alive!’ Sutton mines a vein of drama that is missing from the rest of the story, bless her. Unfortunately all that good work is undone when Nyssa is confronted with the Ergon and screams like a harridan, horror movie style. Gales of laughter would be more appropriate.At least she plucks the intergalactic chicken for good.

Trying Tegan: I cannot handle the way that Tegan gets off the aeroplane in episode two smiling. Who ever knew she had teeth since she spent so much of season nineteen pursing her lips? There is such a difference in her look from last year it is clear that some time has passed since we last saw her. She’s lost her job so all that fussing last year was for nothing. It’s interesting how we see so much of her family over the three years; Auntie Vanessa, Cousin Colin and Grandfather Andrew. Has any other companion been afforded this sort of domestic development and yet still managed to come across as entirely artificial? Mind you, what an odd bunch they all are. My one residing memory of Tegan is her wailing in the Matrix: ‘Holland, Doctor! Aaaaam-ster-daaaam!’ That and the fact that she really doesn't complain too much in this story and it feels as though it might genuinely be the start of a new era for her character.

The Good Stuff: I really had to scrape the barrel to fill this section but here goes…Omega’s mask looks quite impressive when it is glowing with antimatter. The idea of something extra-dimensional breaking into the TARDIS and attacking the Doctor is quite scary and for a few seconds there is some actual drama. Colin’s day glow should be brought up. Colin Baker turns up and hams up his role as Maxil to make things more entertaining – oddly he is the only actor to ramp up the theatrical nature of the piece, to try and suggest this is some sort of operatic piece (which it should be set given it is set on Gallifrey). The irony of Colin Baker shooting Peter Davison is delicious. There is a quick mention of Leela, which is actually one of the few necessary continuity references in a season full of them. It’s something of a minor miracle that Damon as a pleasant and helpful Gallifreyan doesn’t turn out to be a ranting super villain but exactly the sort of chap he seems. The planet can produce some regular citizens then. During the chase around Amsterdam they knock a woman over and her fruit goes rolling down the road…she should have picked one up and tossed it at the back of his head! The snotty, oozing Omega is quite nasty. There's something of a fetish for snot-dribbling deaths in the Saward era (the Tereleptils, Omega, the Malus, Mestor). You’ve got to love that doggie that tries to bite rice-krispified Omega.

The Bad Stuff: What has happened to Gallifrey? It was hardly the vast tapestry of spires and gothic buildings that The Deadly Assassin promised us but they had a damn good go during seasons fourteen and fifteen to suggest some kind of splendour and vastness. All that effort is tossed in the bin in favour of a hideous MDF Ikea nightmare; the most sophisticated, technologically advanced planet in the cosmos looks so eighties. Some of those sets actually offend my eyes, especially that Costa coffee meeting joint that lies just off the one corridor that the Doctor and Nyssa have a desire to run up and down ad nauseum. Bleaugh. Ron Jones' direction is like a pendulum that swings between the horrendous (Arc if Infinity and Time-Flight) and adult and gripping (Frontios, Vengeance). When he was good he was very very good but when he was bad he was awful. The conspiracy scenes lack any menace or atmosphere (plus the pencil waving is comically distracting), the TARDIS scenes are unbelievably static with no attempt at camera movement and some real dreary long shots around the console and the Amsterdam scenes are shot with all the excitement and dynamism of a dreary tourist video for the elderly. There’s no oomph to any of it. The music is like a cheese grater to the ears; its so shrill, tinny and distracting it saps whatever atmosphere there might have been. The menacing shadow of a High Council collar on the door is comically gargantuan. The Ergon has to be seen to be believed; a armed, waddling, skeletal chicken. Every time I watch this story I try and think what the designer was aiming for and always come away wondering why I bothered. Why are the High Council positioned like kids waiting to have their class picture taken? I laughed my head when possessed Colin turned around and we cut to a horrified shot of Robin…you would be hard pressed to work out which one is a zombie given their performance value. The TARDIS roundels look fantastic in burnt peach so why aren’t they always that colour? The Gallifrey and Amsterdam scenes are worlds apart (figuratively and atmospherically); they don’t belong in the same series let alone the same story. To hop from one to the other is extremely jarring. Hedin is so overwhelming amiable towards the Doctor that it would take somebody seriously challenged not to realise he is the villain of the piece. Omega's green and red lit TARDIS looks alarmingly like a gay nightclub I visited once. The music grinds on and on, ironing out all of the tension. I know I have already mentioned that but it's worth another gripe because it is so headache inducing. By any stretch of the imagination the Matrix of Arc of Infinity is a massive step down from the nightmare world it was presented as in The Deadly Assassin; with distractingly unconvincing graphics and it's victims stuck in obscenely rude postures. Why would Hedin disguise his voice for his secret chats with Omega unless he knew he was being watched? It is only for the benefit of the audience at home, there is no explanation for it within the story. There is no characterisation for Omega, no sense of his history or importance, no development or addition to the shows mythos…so what was the point? Such a waste of Elsphet Grey, standing in the background whilst lesser actors spout dull technobabble. The Doctor grappling with the Ergon is another of those priceless moments from the 80s along with the Tinsel Timelash and Ingrid Pitt’s Kung Fu Myrka. Somebody should do a compilation. The closing ten minutes feature a brisk jog around picturesque Amsterdam but what baffles me is how can so much running around can lack pace? Plus it is one implausible marker after another that allows the Doctor to follow Omega. Why is the camera static on location? Tegan screams ‘he’s disappeared!’ but there are about thirty hiding places in the road they have just jogged into.

The Shallow Bit: Colin and Robin are two of the most mis-matched hitchhikers you will ever come across. Considering they are supposed to be best mates they share zero chemistry, like two actors who have just met for the first time. Robin leads Colin down to a crypt so they can snuggle up in sleeping bags. They should have gone the whole ho and had them share one. The chemistry between Nyssa and Talor is much better, he might be as beige as Davison (she likes that sort of thing) but he does seem to care a great deal for her. Tegan vibrates madly and groans her displeasure in the Matrix…the mind boggles! Sarah Sutton looks radiant in the crisp Amsterdam sunshine. I don’t wish to pick on the extras but what is going on with that little girls spectacles in the organ sequence? Go watch it again and boggle.

Result: Arc of Infinity features two equally ponderous plots that fail to gel and direction that sabotages the drama on every level. The cameras stand stock still exposing the scripts deficiencies, the actors’ stiffness and the general cheapness of the sets. When did Doctor Who start relying on technobabble over characterisation? Is this all part of JNT’s drive to aim the show at older nerds? I find it hard to believe that a story where the Doctor is forced back to Gallifrey and assassinated and ends with him murdering a mythic Gallifreyan hero can be this tedious. Tegan returns, but considering I was just getting used the peace without her that is hardly something to shout out about either. This is the story that convinced me that Russell T Davies’ decision to eradicate Gallifrey was a damn good idea. The second overseas location shoot should be something to celebrate but unlike the romance and adventurous spirit of Paris in City of Death you have an appalling plod around Amsterdam, which is made to look like the dullest vacation spot imaginable. Add to this list of deficiencies a sentient, skeletal chicken with a gun, the most bizarre pair of squatters imaginable, a bunch of artificially characterised Time Lords, headache inducing music and a villain who only makes an impact in the last fifteen minutes and a lead actor who seems bored with the entire affair and is making the least amount of effort to inject any drama into the piece. No wonder the show had hemorrhaged around a third of the audience in Davison's second year if this is the best they could come up with. It's worth tuning in to see how well Nyssa copes being the sole companion but make sure you fast forward all scenes that don’t feature the fabulous Sarah Sutton: 2/10



Snakedance written by Christopher Bailey and directed by Fiona Cumming

TO BE REVIEWED...



Mawdryn Undead written by Peter Grimwade and directed by Peter Moffatt
This story in a nutshell: There’s a new boy in the TARDIS and he’s trying to kill the Doctor…

Fair Fellow: Back in the day when I used to review Doctor Who stories for the Doctor Who Ratings Guide (I think I was one of the sites most prolific reviewers but looking back at them now makes me cringe…I simply did not know how to string a sentence together and used to get terribly excited about things which would result in copious amounts of BOLD LETTERS and !!!!!’s) I used to try and convince the world how bland Peter Davison was as the Doctor. Yep I was one of those sorts of fans who thought he knew better than everyone else and went out of his way to try and convince you otherwise. In fact reviews used to bat back and forth between me and few others like a critical version of The Big Questions where we would debate the pros and cons of this incarnation (why we weren’t all off out enjoying the world and making love to beautiful men and women is beyond me). In the intervening years of DWRG and starting my own blog I found Big Finish and fell in love a brand new version of the fifth Doctor on audio and the skill that Davison (now a much older man) could bring to the role. It forced me to go back and see if I had missed anything on television and to my surprise I saw plenty more to enjoy that I had not spotted before. His charming naiveté in Castrovalva, how he was portrayed as a raving fool in Snakedance, his blazing eyed fury in Enlightenment and especially his definitive ‘old man in a young mans body’ performance in The Visitation and Frontios. However whilst I did find these moments scattered about throughout his run (his moral cowardice in Ressurection is another fantastic moment) there are an equal amount of stories where he is either utterly unmemorable (Four to Doomsday, The King’s Demons, The Awakening, Planet of Fire) or eaten up by the complex plot mechanics (Time-Flight, Arc of Infinity, Terminus). Mawdryn Undead is possibly the only story where he suffers the indignity of both. It should be a great story for the Doctor as portrayed by anybody because he gets to enjoy a reunion with the Brigadier (Nicholas Courtney can usually develop chemistry with any actor in the titular role) and face a moral dilemma that any actor worth his salt would get his teeth into. In both of these instances Davison lets the side down; his reaction to the Brigadier’s amnesia is one of mild annoyance (the focus on these scenes is almost entirely on the Brigadier) where some passion might have knocked the memories back into him and he emotes the end of episode three (‘It would mean the end of me as a Time Lord!’) like he is telling a kid what is on the menu tonight (replace with ‘it would mean a finger fingers and chips for tea tonight’ and you’ll see what I mean). There’s no passion in his performance, nothing to grab hold of. It’s a superb actor giving 50% and falling in between the cracks. It’s a shame because as I have said there are wonderful moments to be had for this Doctor during his run but unfortunately you wont find any of them in Mawdryn Undead. For this story at least, Turlough is ten times the character the Doctor is in terms of interest and the main difference between me reporting this now and me reporting this ten years ago is that I take no pleasure in it now. Come episode four there is so much plot to be resolved (the handicap of juggling lots of strong ideas) the Doctor becomes little more than a walking plot device trying to explain and tie the narrative up before the end. All of this would be fine and it’s a role he has played before many times but there is no personality here to make him anything more than a walking plot solver. Even when he walks out of the TARDIS to his death sacrificing himself for his companions (which is an incredible act) Davison looks a bit bored by the whole affair. I wanted to see a man with the weight of his future lives about to stolen from him not an actor wondering when the coffee break is going to be. Davison was not happy with the scripts for season 20 and these are the moments when it shows. Compared with the complexities that Nicholas Courtney is working into his performance, Davison's is sadly deficient.

Alien Orphan: Sarah Sutton struggles gamely with the line ‘he could have been atomised!’ but anybody trying to say that with a straight face is doomed to failiure. Poor Sarah Sutton is so used to hanging around in the TARDIS by now whilst everybody else is having fun (she suffers the indignity of it in The Visitation, Earthshock and Mawdryn Undead) that she makes it look as if she really enjoys it. Give the poor girl something to do or write her out. Oh she’s off in the next story, you say? It does seem odd introducing new companions when the old ones are getting a pretty short shrift.

Mouth on Legs: For once Tegan’s suspicious nature is right on the nail…why would a 20th century schoolboy step into a transmat capsule and then into a blue police box with a spaceship interior and be so indifferent about it all? Its so odd to see Tegan not approach somebody with her usual bad attitude and filthy mouth but I guess even Janet Fielding couldn’t bring herself to throw her weight around in the presence of a living legend like the Nicholas Courtney. She saves all of her bile for Mawdryn and in some hastily scripted scenes comes across as a right old cow (if this really was the Doctor I’d toss her out at the first opportunity) more than ever. I don’t care if she’s right to suspect Mawdryn becuase this woman’s bad attitude stretches my patience to its limits. It's not even that she is saying anything implausible, it's just the effort she puts into not being a very nice person. Its wearying. Rather wonderfully the one person she cannot brow beat is the Brigadier and he casually (almost perversely) throws as much sexism her way as possible. Although Tegan (or probably Janet Fielding) has to have the last word and quietly mutters ‘chauvinist’ when he is out of sight. It makes me wonder if that for all her objections to the contrary if Tegan is the sort of self punishing individual that would subconsciously seek out a chauvinist to marry. Brace yourselves because I am going to finish this section with something nice to say about Tegan…the quiet moment where she thanks the Doctor for the sacrifice he was going to make is gorgeous. Why can’t she be that subtle and warm all the time?

New Boy: I wont beat around the bush – I think that Turlough was the finest innovation to the show in the eighties. You can keep Ace and her horrendous eighties slang and angst and Kamelion who was so good he only hung around for two stories. Turlough was a genuinely fresh idea; an awkward, mistrustful youth who skips into the TARDIS on a promise to murder its pilot. That’s a fantastic character spec in my eyes (although Peter Davison and Janet Fielding seem to have a bit of a problem with it but just nod and smile at them…you often have to placate the stars) and paired with the inspired casting choice of Mark Strickson (who is on top form in his introductory story) and you have something that looked to be very special indeed. It would have taken a pretty inept script editor to waste a character as strong as this. Now I come here not to bury Eric Saward (he does that an awful lot himself in the DVD documentaries) but even he admits that he had a terrific actor in Strickson and a terrific character in Turlough and he failed to give him anything to do after his initial arc of three stories. But what comes next is not for this review…if you want to see how the strongest companion since Romana was treated like an irrelevance then check out my reviews for The King’s Demons, Warriors of the Deep, The Awakening and Resurrection of the Daleks to come. Everything that we see in Mawdryn Undead is very strong and it promises to be an incredible ride with this new companion. With Strickson epitomising shiftiness, a mysterious back story that we aren’t acquainted with and a dark deal made with an ominous force, Turlough can only be considered a success in his first story at whetting our appetite for more. The sad truth is that the 80s was a year where all kinds of fruit loop series were commissioned and one about an alien boy that wound up in a boarding school in England sounds exactly like the sort that would take off. With Mark Strickson, Nicholas Courtney and Peter Halliday fronting it it might have been pretty good too. Turlough calls Hippo ‘fat, ugly and dull’ in a parody of a school bully and yet Turlough clearly enjoys hanging around with Ibbetson because he makes him look better. It rather accentuates what a coward Turlough is, hiding in other peoples shadows (as he would go on to do with the Doctor) and then mock them for standing on their own two feet. The look on his face when he sees the transmat pod is one of pure joy. You can very believe that he thought that he would never see sophisticated technology ever again. In the latter episodes of Mawdryn Undead Turlough is reduced to wandering around corridors aimlessly but Strickson is so good at looking shifty I always wanted to see what he was getting up to.

Chap With Wings: It’s a fact that the Brigadier was an 11th hour replacement for Ian Chesterton who should have appeared in this story. Thank goodness it didn’t work out because it would have crapped all over my assertion that he and Barbara got married and went on to have a long and happy life together. To think of Ian living in that little shed having forgotten his old life and Barbara fills me with horror. When it comes to the Brigadier it is a very different story and this is a pleasingly melancholic stepping stone between his career in UNIT and his marriage with Doris. We have often wondered what happened to companions after the Doctor has left them and the Brigadier is a very singular case because he and the Doctor shared something very special (especially in the latter stages of the Pertwee era) and he was a large part of Alistair’s life for some time. The thought that whilst the fourth Doctor headed off and started enjoying adventures in time and space the Brigadier was trapped in a less than fortunate existence, amnesiac and alone is crushingly sad. What I especially love about Mawdryn Undead is how it reveals the Brig’s seven year depression and breaks it within the same story. It means we get to experience his emotional crisis (and one which lasts some time so it isn’t handled unrealistically) and have a happy ending which smacks of having your cake and eating it but where the Brig is concerned I wouldn’t have had it any other way than to end on a positive note. It's really nice to see Nicholas Courtney given some tough personal material and he more than rises to the challenge. It has been so long since Terror of the Zygons that the meeting between the Doctor and the Brigadier feels like a massive event and I love the way they play the game of him not recognising the Time Lord because he has changed his identity…and yet when it comes to it the Brig doesn’t know who the Doctor is at all. With a sinking feeling you realise something is very wrong. The Brig catches us up with what has happened to the UNIT family since we left the Earth; Benton left the army in 1979 and sells second hand cars and Harry was seconded to NATO where he is doing some very hush hush work. Clips of past adventures are tenapenny these days (Logopolis, Earthshock…) but the black and white montage that the Brigadier experiences really means something because he is reclaiming all those wonderful, terrifying memories (it's also a great example of Peter Moffatt’s visual storytelling, focussing squarely on the actor and allowing the music and the clips to guide us to the conclusion without ever telling us that he has these memories back). How can you not have the same sort of fuzzy feeling that a cuddle with your partner gives you on a winters morning when you see all those UNIT adventures squeezed together? If Nicholas Courtney was awkward at having to take the Brigadier to some emotionally unbalanced places (‘Treatment? There’s nothing wrong with me Doctor!’) then so much the better because that is expressed in his performance and it makes the moment all the more destabilising for those of us who know and love the character. Like a lot of people in the same situation he scoffs at the idea of a breakdown despite the clear indications that he has suffered some kind of trauma. It's nice that even in these less fortunate days of his life he has found a career in teaching that he rather enjoys. When the Brigadier marches into the TARDIS and says he knows how to handle it he does have a good point – who on the Earth has experienced it twice before?

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Who are they?’ ‘Fools who tried to turn themselves in Time Lords!’
‘What you want is murder eight times over!’ ‘No what we desire is our own death…’  – when you are dealing with dialogue like that we have gone well beyond the usual JNT snazzy set piece storytelling into something a bit deeper.
‘Sometimes you have to live with the consequences of your actions’ is the Doctor’s harsh judgement on Mawdryn and his fellows. I just wish Peter Davison said it with more passion.

The Good:
  • It has been mentioned before (most recently by Gareth Roberts in a hilarious article in DWM) that if you described the music in Mawdryn Undead as incidental that you would be arrested under the trades description act. It is attention grabbingly present in every scene it appears (that’s every scene) and it occasionally shits all over the action as Paddy Kingsland has a heart attack whilst attached to an electric guitar. However (and this is the rub) its actually one of my favourite Doctor Who scores because musically it is actually of an extremely high standard. Whilst it might have been better paired up with a more exciting story (it does seem to stress excitement in places where none is present…or maybe that was the idea?) it is still an atmospheric, aggressive, persistent and pacy soundtrack which when listened to independent of the story actually takes you to some very visual places. Some people still cry at the loss of Dudley Simpson when he was dropped at the start of the eighties (mostly when they are enduring aural torture at the hands of Roger Limb or Malcolm Clarke) but it's clear that bringing in the more melodic, less instrumental scores of the radiophonic workshop was a smart move and it gave the series a massive shot in the arm. Many people laud Peter Howell as the most innovative musician to have stepped up to the plate during this period (and I would never dream of arguing with them) but I also find Kingsland’s music a joy to listen to (in a way that only a sad Doctor Who fan like me can walking through the town with the Castrovalva music blaring in my ears…). Mawdryn Undead is perhaps his most controversial score but conversely it is the one time I would say that he approaches Howell in producing something truly memorable enough to be talked about today. The insane chords that strike when the TARDIS is about to strike the ship suggest we are going to see some fantastic Star Wars style effects as the cuboid TARDIS spins dramatically into a collision (actually the CGI on the DVD does give this whole scene much of the dynamism the music was hoping for!). Episode three is where the music is most needed because there is an awful lot of wandering around that spaceship and so Kingsland allows the different character themes to blend into each other as we cut from person to person. It makes the whole piece flow much more than it otherwise would. The upbeat score at the end of the story almost feels like a congratulatory pat on the back – we tied ourselves in knots with so many clever ideas and we managed unravel ourselves and tie them up satisfactorily! With the Brigadier back where he should be, Mawdryn given the peace he sought and a new TARDIS crew member that comes with a thrilling backstory it is exactly the sort of clap on the back uplifting music the show deserves to bow out on.
  • I do think there is something in the comment that other countries enjoy Doctor Who for its ‘Britishness.’ And what could be more of a metaphor for British stiff upper lippedness than a vintage car leaving a boarding school being driven by a boy in a boater? Who else could you drop into this environment but the Brigadier – the quintessential image of a British gentleman?
  • All credit to JNT for bringing back Valentine Dyall to play the Black Guardian again and it's wonderful to see him availing himself of one of the finer ideas of his predecessors run. I’m not sure about the logic of sticking a dead crow on his head (it does rather look like it fell out of tree and he couldn’t be arsed to remove it) but Dyall has a deliciously gruff and sinister voice that really brings the character to life vividly. There has been a change of Doctor, several changes of companion, script editor and producer since we last saw the Black Guardian but this is a very positive link to the past in a year full of them.
  • The cliffhangers in this story are all doing something different and that should be applauded. Episode one climaxes with the Doctor’s new companion trying to kill him (although to get full cliffhanger-worthiness out of the moment he picks up the biggest rock known to man and stands over the Doctor menacingly for what feels like the length of a bible) which is a very novel way of introducing a new regular to the line up. Episode two suggests that the Doctor has regenerated into something much more alien looking - an idea that has been discussed by fans before but never on screen and one that is explored through the next instalment. And episode three takes a far less visually dramatic cliffhanger route than usual and goes for a conceptual threat of the Doctor having to choose to give his lives to save Mawdryn and his friends. In each case these scenarios have never been explored before and Grimwade deserves credit for managing to find new, interesting avenues to explore when it comes to a cliffhanger.
  • Mawdryn could have so easily have been a forgettable character (when he doesn’t really threaten the Doctor and his friends in any other way beyond keeping them on the spaceship) but in the hands of David Collings (following his memorable performance in Robots of Death and his stratospheric performance in Revenge of the Cybermen) he becomes a much more interesting prospect. Collings plays him with just the right amount of acidity – he’s sympathetic but also rude, he’s obnoxious but has endured a terrible punishment. Because the Doctor is roaming about elsewhere in the story we never truly believe that this ever could have been him but its fascinating to see his companions (including the younger Brigadier) trying to get their heads around the fact that this abrasive man could be their new Doctor. Collings as the Doctor…don’t tempt me with such a delicious concept! The make up team deserve a massive round of applause because his scabrous burns look really nasty and you have to wonder what sort of pain you would have to endure to wind up as bruised as that. Although I’m not sure about the upside down spaghetti bolognaise on his head…wisely the director chooses to ignore that for the most part. With his no nonsense rude attitude and his unwillingness to suffer fools gladly (well he doesn’t suffer anybody really) Mawdryn almost plays out as a prototype sixth Doctor. Perhaps Eric Saward was taking notes of the things he liked about David Collings portrayal and saving them for the next incarnation. Whilst everybody else is wandering around the spaceship as though they are on a shopping trip Collings is using the space like a really good actor should, crawling across the floor and climbing the walls in desperation. The unusual balletic design of their robes gives the illusion that they these people are gliding across the sets – it's another oddity that works in this story’s favour. Death is always treated as something to fear on Doctor Who (including regeneration) so it is dipping its toes into some fresh waters when we close in on Mawdryn with a look of ecstasy on his face as he finally slips away. It's thoughtful moments like this that really elevate this story and it’s the only satisfying end to this terrific character. This is one of those stories that features a Saward massacre but to quote the Doctor from Caves of Androzani ‘it feels different this time…’
  • I love the dual timeline that Grimwade introduces so simply and yet so cleverly into the story. It’s the sort of thing that you imagine Doctor Who with its time travel abilities would have done plenty of times before but it has taken until its 20th season to make an attempt. It's one of those moments that really makes you sit up and pay attention to the story and one of the rare occasions when a second episode makes more of an impact than the first. There's another terrific make up job as well with the younger Brigadier looking for all the world as though the production team have a time machine and managed to sneak a younger version of Nicholas Courtney into the studio for a few days. The get out clause of both Brigadier’s heading for the spaceship sounds like it is a throwaway line (‘I remember I didn’t go with Nyssa and Tegan…I was standing near the transmitter when the TARDIS dematerialised…’) but this scenario does play out in episode four but after he has lost his memory. Clever stuff. This story has got quite a lot to answer for  (in a good way) when it comes to doppelganger stories in future series (and every science fiction show from Buffy to Farscape to Star Trek has a go at it). They build up the threat of the Brigadier meeting the Brigadier into something catastrophic that every time those any other show dabbles in the same concept I always think that something awful and Blinovitch Limitational is going to happen! 
  • For once Time Lord technology is not introduced simply to sound dramatic (the Demat Gun in The Invasion of Time, ‘Impulse laser?’ from Arc of Infinity) but to kick the story in a very different direction. The creatures suffering eternal life for dabbling in a science that they should never have been exposed to is poetic justice since they were trying to extend their lives. It goes to show just how dangerous Time Lord technology can be in the wrong hands. For once there is more than melodramatic sentiment in the title, the clue to their eternal torture is right there for the taking at the front of each episode. The image of the other seven creatures sitting in their thrones in complete silence as Turlough discovers them and barely able to react to his presence is haunting. This is the result of eternal life – eternal borderm and decrepitude. Between this and The Five Doctors, Doctor Who paints a pretty bleak picture of immortality.
  • Using time and his friends as a weapon against the Doctor is a far more insidious than simply pointing a gun in his face (ala Earthshock). Watching Nyssa and Tegan age to death (the make up looks disturbingly like they are severely battered housewives – that’s pretty destabilising for kids) and reduced to childhood is such a fascinating new angle of jeopardy I kind of wish they had made more of it. For Grimwade it is another captivating idea thrown into the melting pot that makes up this unusual story.
  • The way the uniting of the two Lethbridge Stewarts causes an explosion big enough for Mawdryn and his followers to exploit and finally commit suicide is so neat even Terrance Dicks (with his insistence on logical plot resolutions) would be applauding. I honestly couldn’t see how this was going to end satisfactorily – I thought the Doctor would whip up some indecipherable technobabble to kill Mawdryn and the Brigadier’s would never meet. What we get instead is far more satisfying. Its a script that has been running with two strong ideas only to bring them together in the climax and cancel each other out. Plus it kick starts the Brigadier’s breakdown and so effectively begins the story all over again. Very nicely done.
  • The parting shot of this show is a cremation in space. Stick the CGI on when you watch the DVD as it finally gives this poetic closing image justice.

The Bad:
  • Why did Saward feel the need to link each season with a mention at the beginning of each story with a summation of what the last one was about? If it has no place within the story you are telling then don’t include it. Ah but Tegan is still haunted by the Mara, I hear you say, it has a character purpose. Well, hardly. All it takes is for the Doctor to say ‘forget about it’ and she never mentions it again and gets on with the latest adventure. If this was something that truly got to her it would haunt her every thought…it strikes me of pretending to be character development rather than actually embracing what that actually means. It was even more apparent in Time-Flight in the wake of Adric’s death but just as sloppily handled here in a less showy way.
  • The console room has never felt more like a studio set than it does in the Davison era. The way everybody hangs around the console trying to look busy is painfully awkward. It's only when the TARDIS crew lands on the deserted spaceship which is packed full of lush detail that you realise what an embarrassingly empty space the TARDIS has become. It's even more apparent when Tegan and Nyssa drag some wicker furniture into the console room and sit down and then they look like two actresses left out of the action in front of some boring roundel flats. It is during these scenes that Moffatt’s point and shoot approach to telling a story really stumbles – it doesn’t matter so much on location when there is lush greenery to admire but in a set as drab as this his static camerawork really lets the side down.
  • ‘I want you to take the Brigadier back to the TARDIS – right to the centre!’ The TARDIS is an unending labyrinth. How long is that going to take? Maybe there’s room for the odd novel featuring the Brigadier and Nyssa wandering the TARDIS corridors? Hey I’ve seen books commissioned on less stable premise than that!

The Shallow Bit: The opening scene might be the gayest thing ever seen in Doctor Who (and this is a hotly contested category) with boarding school lads hanging around watching Turlough approvingly in their tight white T shirts and tiny sports shorts. The transmat capsule design looks oddly like the entrance to a particularly fruity 80s gay disco…perhaps JNT gave them some design tips? Janet Fielding hated her boob tube but it does make her look as cute as a button…some feat given her performance.

Result: It’s a JNT story written by Peter Grimwade and directed by Peter Moffatt and so naturally it is shite. If you thought that was what I was going to say you are wrong because I have a sneaky (as in it grows on me more every time I watch it) fondness for Mawdryn Undead with its atypical storytelling and generally attractive production. By far Grimwade’s strongest script for the series, it juggles a whole bunch of interesting ideas which include dual timelines, two Brigadiers, the Doctor regenerating into an alien, Nyssa and Tegan being infected by time and the Doctor sacrificing his remaining lives. Unlike Time-Flight (which is far too ambitious and complicated for its own good) and Planet of Fire (which is hampered by a shopping list of ingredients) Grimwade manages to tie all of these ideas into an engaging, well paced narrative that tosses aside the usual 80s lust for set pieces and tries to be a little more thoughtful. You’ve also got the introduction of the strongest companion we have seen on the show for some time and Mark Strickson proves to be an attention grabbing addition to the series. With his and Nick Courtney’s nuanced performances you can almost forgive how little the Doctor is given to do (beyond explain the plot) and how grumpy Tegan is in places (there’s nothing new in either of those observations and they’re a curse on the era) or how static the direction can be in the studio scenes. I’ve always found season 20 to be the weakest of the Davison seasons (any season that includes Arc of Infinity and The King’s Demons was never going to rank high on anybody’s list) but re-watching the stories out of order has surprised me with how innovative the story ideas are this year and how much intelligent science fiction Eric Saward was trying inject into the series whilst his producer was indulging in love letters to the past. Mawdryn Undead alone contains a number of really clever ideas (my favourite being the living death that Mawdryn and his cohorts are suffering – such a poetic consequence of their crime) but each story this year has one or two really engaging science fiction ideas at their core. Any story that can handle the Brigadier having a breakdown, reveal the dangers of misusing Time Lord technology and have the companion try and kill the Doctor and tie all three into a very clever climax is doing some quite special in my book. Add in an insane Paddy Kingsland score and some terrific design work and you have a mid eighties tale that is trying far harder than the series was given credit for at the time. Undervalued and well worth another watch: 8/10


Terminus written by Stephen Gallagher and directed by Mary Ridge

This story in a nutshell: The Big Bang explained and the Big Crunch averted…

Fair Fellow: You have got to give Peter Davison his due he is a very perceptive fellow. When he decided enough was enough after his second year and that his third would be his last it was because of the dearth of decent material he was given in season 20. Snakedance and Enlightenment aside he is pretty much sidelined, ignored or used as a device to channel plot exposition through. Very rarely is he written as a character in his own right, perpetuating stories. In Terminus the Doctor is not given any moments of charm or humour and as a result he is an unrelentingly dull person to be around. All he does is explain the plot (something Davison does very well to his credit, I was never lost) and reel off technobabble. It’s such a waste of an actor of his calibre. He has to suffer a number of particularly inept fight scenes also, directed without much thought under terrible time constraints. In the DVD documentary Davison admits this was a particularly fraught production and he didn't really enjoy it and that comes across on screen. This is not the work of an actor in love with his part. The one moment he shined was during Nyssa’s explanation for why she wanted to leave; his gentle acceptance is very touching and there is a brief rekindle of that special connection between the two characters. As Big Finish have shown, it could have been so much more.

Narky Aussie: In Terminus Tegan manages to be suspicious, rude, accusatory, unwelcoming, judgmental and shout when she can’t get her own way…and that’s just in the first scene. Turlough describes her approach to things as sledgehammer tactics – I always said he was a perceptible sort of fellow. Tegan is groped all over by nasty Lazar hands so I find it a little odd that it’s Nyssa that contracts the illness. If she had to save a friend or defend herself she might consider killing somebody. How funny is it when she has to try and stop the ship from disengaging and when she fails she simply screams ‘shut up!’ to the computer. A rare talent, this one. Her reaction to Nyssa’s departure is, surprisingly, quiet and very sweet.

Alien Orphan: I’ve always liked Nyssa because even though she wasn’t always given the best material in the programme Sarah Sutton was by far the most reliable and convincing of performers in the early Davison era. It's great to see her leave in a story that plays to all of her strengths and weaknesses. If synthesizing and enzyme is Nyssa’s idea of a good night in I imagine she will be single for a long time. Why can't these geeky characters be seen to kick back in their spare time and have some fun? Nyssa is always reading books on maths and tinkering with sonic vibrators. It’s fabulous to have Nyssa alone and afraid in a creepy location, she really has earned this screen time. There is a sudden close up on her face as she explores the Lazar ship which really managed to put the wind up me. Although he doesn’t really deserve the attention Nyssa sticks up for wimpy Olvir. It makes sense for one of the regulars to catch the disease and what could be more horrifying than to subject sweet innocent Nyssa to such filth and degradation? Nyssa slips out of her skirt and parades around in her underwear - the lads punch the air with delight and the ladies step up their women’s lib campaign in protest (fronted by Janet Fielding, of course). ‘Are you Doctors?’ ‘Baggage handlers’ – I really like that exchange because it sums up exactly the sort of people Nyssa is dealing with. And will be dealing with for some time. She slaps Valguard around a bit and later tackles Olvir and jumps his bones, it is great that when the occasion arrives Nyssa is always seen to be able to take care of herself physically. She is a compassionate woman and begs for the more ill victims to be cured before her. She really comes into her own in the last episode, realising that the cure works but it isn’t controlled and than are just trading one killer for another. ‘The Company isn’t interested’ ‘Are you though?’ Who would have guessed that Nyssa would wind up as a drug peddler for a leper colony? I know it isn't as simple as that but that is what it essentially boils down to. Her decision to stay is sensitively handled, she has loved her time on the TARDIS but on Terminus she has a chance to put her skills into practice and really help people. Nyssa chokes back tears and kisses the Doctor goodbye…it's one of the more understated goodbyes and yet one of the more touching examples because of it. I will miss her and I don't say that about many eighties companions.

Traitorous Ginge: An assassin in the TARDIS posing as a companion is such an intriguing idea it’s a shame they didn’t keep it going a bit longer. Davison and Saward bemoan that the idea was already too protracted over 12 episodes but with a little imagination you could easily work an anti-hero into the TARDIS crew permanently. Imagine somebody with the moral scruples of Avon from Blake's 7 travelling with the Doctor? Mind you the fifth Doctor is so forgettable at this stage to put somebody that interesting by his side would reduce his meagre status even further. Perhaps that is why Turlough's role was reduced to nothing post-Enlightenment. He was too interesting and taking the limelight away from a rather wishy washy Doctor. Charm the way he uses it is to disagree agreeably. Tegan thinks he has the manners of a pig but I can only think she is talking about herself. I love his eye rolling sneakiness the moment anyone’s back is turned, Mark Strickson has perfected that look. The decision to kill the Doctor is clearly weighing heavily on Turlough’s mind. Without realising it he almost causes the end of the universe by accident. Way to go, Turlough.

The Good Stuff: Continuity is littered about Adric’s room; it’s a nice, subtle way for the audience to pick up on previous adventures if they have been loyal to the show. The first episode feels as though it belongs in the very first season, there are protracted character development scenes in the TARDIS, a slow build up of tension and a cheap but thrilling location. It could almost be The Daleks. The blackness invading the TARDIS and the skull face appearing in Nyssa’s room is bloody scary (the music, which I will slaughter elsewhere in this review, is extremely effective at this point). The sound effects on the Lazar ship generate far more tension than the direction. The shields come crashing down, the computer leaks information, the lepers emerge and fill the corridors with disease…the first episode is very well done. The first cliffhanger is easily laughed at but this story is supposed to be operatic, it isn't poor Olvir's fault that it is confined to a cramped BBC studio. Imagine thousands of lepers spilling into a vast, dank and decaying terminus and then play the scene again. The CGI Terminus is beautifully realised and it is another example of the DVD extras providing far more scope than the original model work could manage. There is a 360 degrees view with the sun providing a gorgeous backdrop and the ship docks with a greater degree of detail. Gallagher injects a pleasing amount of darkness into the script with talk of sterilisation, drug addiction, disease and corruption. I love the idea of a lift descending into Hell. A commercial company is running Terminus, making plenty of money and not going through the appropriate procedures to cure any of the victims. Sounds like a typical Eric Saward vision of the future to me, but a gripping one. The Company sends coloured water instead of the drug that the slave workers need to survive; you couldn’t pay anybody enough to volunteer to work at Terminus. Bor is a delightful character and played with childish glee (even when his face is covered with hideous radiation burns).  Eirak is one of those morally ambiguous characters that Doctor Who slips in every now and again to keep things interesting, sitting somewhere between ally and enemy. Terminus was once capable of time travel, it was a ship in flight with an enormous amount of unstable fuel, which was ejected into the void causing a chain reaction: the Big Bang. Putting aside the production problems, that is a pretty damn solid hard SF idea to build a Doctor Who story around. The pilot time jumped forward and the shockwaves caught up billions of years in the future and killed him and damaged the second engine. Whereas the first explosion created the universe, the second would destroy it. One of the few times the entire universe is put in jeopardy, what a shame that it couldn't have been executed with as much skill as it was written. I really like the uncertainty of the ending, which has no easy solutions and a lot of work ahead of them; it makes for a realistic conclusion.

The Bad Stuff: The Doctor shoving the chair in the door is so lame. There’s more of Roger Limb’s tinny, tinnitus inducing music, which is such a shame because a spookier score could really have benefited this story. Liza Goddard turns up in a huge goldfish bowl and hideous eighties make up and the atmosphere drains like letting air out of a balloon. Why are these pirates dressed up like 80’s glam rockers? Bask in one of the worst robots ever to be committed to film (Until Kamelion comes along). It is supposed to be strong enough to drag victims to their treatment when in reality it looks as though a good sneeze could shove it over. ‘ADVANCE PARTY TO RAY-DAR, COME IN RAY-DAR, COME IN!’ – Goddard is both shockingly wooden and very funny (Simon walked in on that line when I last watched it and fell about laughing...I remember he was quoting this line for a good few weeks).  Proof if it was needed that three companions is too many, Tegan (yay!) and Turlough (boo!) are shoved into some service hatches for two episodes and given nothing to do. It's like the Nyssa in bed syndrome in Kinda all over again except more obvious because we keep cutting back to them not getting involved in the plot. Is Olvir the wimpiest transvestite of all time? ‘I’m supposed to be combat trained’ - you would think going around dressed like that he would have learnt how to look after himself.  Episode one spends a lot of time delaying the exposition to ramp up the atmosphere but come the second episode the slothenly pace really starts to harm the story. I really like the design of the Vanir but the costumes are made out of such cheap, clunking material that they serve to highlight the cheapness of this production. Pity the poor pot belied, bearded Garm. He wants so desperately to be treated as a serious performer but is mostly greeted with gales of laughter or a good pat on the head. The Terminus sets are so underdressed, featureless and unmemorable which might have been the idea but the result is there is nothing to feast your eyes on but empty blackness. And that gets boring very quickly. Crossing the line into the forbidden zone should be a terrifying prospect but in this Poundland funded production it turns out to be duct tape on the floor and a great hairy dog that has escaped from a kids entertainment party. Everything has fallen to pieces come episode three; the Doctor is fighting ineffectually with Valguard, Bor jumps in, the Garm waddles into view…it feels like it is being made up as it goes along. Terminus is shoehorned into the Black Guardian trilogy but the Doctor and Turlough are separated throughout so we are stuck with reminders at the beginning and the end of the story and several bizarre reminders in between that have nothing at all to do with the story. Terminus doesn’t advance Turlough's character arc at all. The conclusion is a big grey dog pushing a lever, its such a crushingly dull way to avert the destruction of the universe that you have to wonder why they bothered. 

Result: What surprised me when looking at Terminus with an objective eye rather than watching it merely for entertainment is that there is far more to enjoy than I previously thought. The script is actually very good and full of dark, seedy ideas and in particular first episode (even Kari and Olvir if they had been Valkyrie style space pirates that looked as though they might head butt you at any minute) is one of the strongest scene setters of the era. I have always thought that Terminus deserved a stronger director but having seen Mary Ridge's superb work over at Blake's 7 it seems obvious that the terrible time pressure and studio problems really dented her confidence. I would have loved to have seen her helm another Doctor Who because if she brought anywhere near as much drama to the series as she did in the B7 episodes Terminal and Blake we would have been in great shape. Listen to Fiona Cumming discuss her in the documentary and you get the impression that she was the consummate professional. Take into consideration the madness that was happening behind the scenes and bask in the fact that it is as good as it is in places, or that it was made at all. Terminus is a horror story in space and needed far more atmosphere and a more sober score to bring its creepy ideas to life; it needed the same sort of atmosphere that pervades David Maloney’s Planet of Evil. With clunking action scenes, dull sets and a distinct lack of sparkle you will probably lose interest in the later episodes which is a shame because there is some intelligent detail and realism in the script. Minus points for wasting Davison but plus points for letting Sarah Sutton go out on such a strong note. Whilst I would hardly call Terminus a success, it is one of my biggest surprises since starting this marathon (The Tenth Planet is still my biggest, followed by Mindwarp, followed by Terminus). Worth watching with the production nightmare in mind (see also Nightmare of Eden): 6/10

Enlightenment written by Barbara Clegg and directed by Fiona Cumming

This story in a nutshell: Set sail and join the sailing race of a lifetime! A race set amongst the stars…

Fair Fellow: It really pleases me to that see Peter Davison being given material of this calibre to play with in his time as the Doctor because up to this point all I feel I have seen him do is propping up lacklustre stories that need all the help they can get. You would think that in a story like Enlightenment which has many virtues that perhaps Davison would disappear into the background but nothing could be further from the truth. I especially liked his disapproval of the Eternals for using human beings as blueprints so they can feel something about the race and gain some level of existence. His eyes blaze with anger during his scenes with Striker and it’s a look that really suits him. After his dull resignation throughout the majority of season 20 it is great to finally see him get passionate about something. He looks horrified that they can read his mind and tries to keep the TARDIS safe from them. Hilariously he doesn’t even notice when Tegan has changed from a spiky haired women’s lib protestor into Edwardian royalty - sex simply wasn't a consideration during this period of the show. The Doctor is remarkable in other ways, apparently. He doesn’t trust Turlough and I like that he doesn’t hide the fact either – this is the abrasive Eric Saward approach to characterisation working at its best. Of all the times the TARDIS has been out of reach from the Doctor I don’t think we have ever had it hidden somewhere as ingenious as in his mind. Pleasingly the Doctor doesn’t think he is ready for Enlightenment, he doesn’t think anybody is. Considering how the Time Lords are revered in the classic series it is fascinating to see how they are considered in the hierarchy of higher beings. The Guardians look down on the the Eternals and they in turn look down on the Time Lords. It is quite a humbling experience for the Doctor.

Mouthy Missus: Colour me impressed but for a few episodes I actually thought they managed to do something with Tegan that was worth watching. It is always so refreshing when a writer decides to do something more worthwhile with the character than having her bleed negativity all over the place and in Barbara Clegg's hands she is a full fleshed out character rather than simply a channel antagonism. Given her propensity for flying off the handle I can see why a being who has never experienced emotion before would find her intriguing and pairing her with an unrequited love interest leads to some interesting scenes. You have to wonder if there is any space left for Tegan in her brain what with the Mara and Mariner rummaging about in there.  The Doctor insists she stays in the TARDIS at the beginning and I have to admit I did whoop for joy...but if she had we would have been denied one of her best stories. It really bugged me that she was shown something as glorious as sailing ships flying in space and still she moans, this time about sea sickness! Get with the programme love, that is one of the most glorious sights you will ever see. Tegan’s bedroom on the ship turns out to be a weird mixture of her room on the TARDIS and her bedroom in Brisbane, it’s a creepy and effective example of what the Eternals can create from your memories. I loved it when she fought back, closed off her mind and killed her thoughts to Mariner. Say what you will about this character (and I sure do) but she certainly is strong willed. Decking Tegan in cut jewels and an exquisite wig softens her considerably. Mariner finds the confusion in her mind exhilarating suggesting there is something much more complex going on there than usually appears on screen. Wrack uses Tegan as an assassin which seems like a perfectly reasonable course of action to me. She really doesn’t know how to deal with Mariner’s advances; he wants her completely, to give him existence. Men probably run in the other direction as quickly as possible usually so this is an entirely unpredictable situation. When she thinks the Doctor is dead the sparkle goes from her mind, that's a very telling moment. It’s a shame that the show at the time was stuck in the mindset that relationships for the regulars was out of the question because it would have been quite interested had Tegan been interested in Mariner and happy to explore a romance. Her cold rejection of him at the story’s close is the grumpy Tegan we know and (cough cough) love.

Over the Shoulder: It's great to see Turlough getting so much to do because for his next four stories you be hard pressed to think that he is a companion at all and not just some educated ginger that hangs about in the background looking shifty and as Enlightenment proves Mark Strickson has quite a lot to give. After Adric’s embarrassing bravado it is nice to have a male companion who is clearly a wimp out for himself, oddly it makes him far more likable character because of it. For such a shifty guy, he hits it off with the sailors and seems to fit right in. The turning point for his character comes when he tosses himself overboard, preferring to commit suicide rather than serve the Black Guardian any longer. Turlough is ultimately a good person but will consider all the other options before getting there. Curiosity almost killed Turlough…he is almost sucked into the vacuum of space when he goes poking around Wrack’s ship (in a scene that proves that male companions can scream just as shrill as the female ones). He’s such a turncoat, when it looks like he is going to die he begs his former employer to help him and when he is rejected when that doesn’t work he balls out the Doctor's name instead. I simply can't help but like this guy, for all the wrong reasons. Who else but Turlough would worm his way in with Wrack and her pirates? I love the frightened look he gives her when she shows him the plank in action. He has to choose between Enlightenment and the Doctor and it feels very real that he would actually ponder on that for a moment. It is such an important moment for the character that the climax of the story is given over to him entirely. He wants to go home but we still don't know anything about Trion yet. 

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘You are a Time Lord. A Lord of Time. Are there dwellers in such a small domain?’
‘Living minds are contaminated with crude emotions! Organic, irrational, creative, entertaining!’
‘Love? What is love? I want existence.’

The Good Stuff: This is the second time this season somebody has turned the lights down in the TARDIS and turned the roundels a burnt peach – it is so much more atmospheric than the usual over lit artificiality you have to wonder why they didn’t keep it this way. The White Guardian invades the TARDIS just like old times. It’s marvellous to see the TARDIS materialise in the creaking, heaving hold of a sailing ship. In a season that is starting to feel a little too outer space, it is an atmospheric reminder of the diverse locations where the ship can land. It is very clever how the story completely convinces as a period piece on the high seas cumulating in one of the best surprise cliffhangers the original series ever presented. The hands on the scanner is another unusual moment to delight. The visual of sailing ships flying through the stars highlighted by the corona of the sun really captures your senses. Planets are marker buoys. Fire rages around the ship as they plunge through the atmosphere of Venus – the newly designed CGI effects really work a treat. The Eternals are a fantastic creation, bored immortal entities feeding on human imagination like parasites. Never mind Peter Sallis (who would have been excellent admittedly), Keith Baron gives Striker real gravitas; you really get the sense that he is a fatigued omnipresent being. Mariner is sweet and sexy and just a little bit creepy, it’s a fascinating mix. The scenes on deck touched with starlight and an enchanting view of the stars are pure magic, it’s the sort of atmosphere 80’s Who strived for quite often but rarely achieved. The camera craning up the side of the ship is another winding new effect and to top it off Malcolm Clarke has ditched his experimental style of music and is really plugging for atmosphere and chills. The Bucaneer is beautifully designed; candle lit and decked out in pirate booty and Wrack’s clash of cultures party really allows the designers to go to town and give these episodes a rich, eclectic look. I love Lynda Baron’s flirty, violent and buxom pirate captain; she cackles like a lunatic and positively glows on screen. Enlightenment brings you whatever you desire and you might imagine that the realisation would be stunning but whichever version you watch it manages to live up to expectations. The whole set piece of Tegan’s explosive tiara is edited together furiously in the special edition and with a dynamic new score it feels fresh and exciting. And it was pretty damn exciting in the first place. I really enjoyed the final conceit that Enlightenment wasn’t the diamond but the choice. The White Guardian admits that whilst he exists so will the Black Guardian and he will be looking for a third encounter. Until the universe no longer needs them. Come on Moffatt, get on that.

The Bad Stuff: The only thing I don’t like about this story is the daft birds atop the Guardians heads. I can see what the idea is but it doesn't come off.

Result: Imaginative, enchanting, dramatic and exciting, Enlightenment is one of the best classic Doctor Who serials. The first solo script written by a woman is a belter full of clever ideas and unforgettable imagery. Fiona Cumming is one of my favourite Doctor Who directors and she really has an affinity with this material, bringing it to life with a rare touch of magic and emotion that is unusual in this era series. What’s more there is a great role for the Doctor, Tegan and Turlough (a miracle, I tell you) and all of the guest cast are worth their weight in gold. I really cannot fault this story, the dialogue is like a rich wine, the story continually finds inventive things to show us and the conclusion wraps up everything very satisfactorily. I find it very pleasing that a story this good should not only be nestled firmly during the much maligned eighties Who but also that it adds a touch of alchemy to one of my least favourite seasons. Give the special edition a chance, it takes a great story and cuts out the flab and adds some superb special effects: 10/10

The King’s Demons written by Terrance Dudley and directed by Tony Virgo

This story in a nutshell: The introduction of Kamelion, a companion so good he only appeared in his first and last story!

Fair Fellow: No wonder Davison decided to quit after ending his second season on such a low. The Doctor as written here lacks any sparkle or wit, delivers functional dialogue and trips from one scene to the next as though he is a little embarrassed to be taking part in such nonsense. He gets to indulge in a sword fight which is so stagily choreographed it looks like two nervous actors brandishing weapons they don’t know how to use dancing around each other and he’s saddled with one grouchy passionless companion and another who he’s forgiven for recently trying to kill him. The Doctor has the perfect opportunity to put the Master out of his misery once and for all (and lets face it when the poor old git is dragging it up as ginger Monty Python cast off he’s clearly past his best and needs putting out to pasture…) but his ‘moral scruples’ get in the way. I wish Colin Baker were here because he wouldn’t have hesitated in putting the sad sausage out of his misery. His brilliant solution is to nick Kamelion and then just leave. He hasn’t quite got the touch that he used to. I some ways I wish Davison had stayed on for one more year (in that 'what if?' fairyland) because it would have been interesting to see how he would have coped with Vengeance on Varos, The Two Doctors and Revelation of the Daleks.

Mouth on Legs: Perhaps Janet Fielding is right and the dialogue Tegan is given is functional and stilted. How could anybody make a line like ‘Could it be a Black Guardian trap?’ sound convincing? Mind you I don’t think the writing is entirely to blame since Elisabeth Sladen and the other really good actresses to play companions managed to sell their (occasionally) risible dialogue in a way that Ms Fielding often failed to do. Tegan thinks that King John is ‘the one who lost something in the wash.’ That’s a halfway funny line, maybe there is hope for her yet. ‘Who cares!’ she whinges, ‘all I care about is getting back to the TARDIS where its nice and warm!’ Maybe not. Go and step in a rabbit trap you whinging old mare…the sooner you get sickened by the violence of your adventures and storm out of the Doctor's life the better for the series. She is detrimental to the stories playing out – when one of your heroes shows this much despondence towards the adventure why the hell should the viewer be encouraged? Imagine Sarah Jane moaning about returning to the TARDIS all the time? No, she couldn’t wait to get outside and taste the oranges and step out in the snow and that’s why we loved being around her. Tegan cries ‘the Tissue Compression Eliminator!’ as if she has only just twigged that this is the Master despite the fact he transformed about 30 seconds earlier. And what the hell is it about people this season crying out the name of a weapon when they are faced with it (‘Impulse laser?’ is another beaut). ‘Look lets get out of here while we’ve got the chance!’ could be nobody else but Tegan, the bloody coward. Maybe Davison had a point that the far more positive Nyssa complimented his character better. The shot of two Tegan’s in the TARDIS was enough to bring me out in hives, although not as shocking as when the Mara filled her mind with a manifest of grumpy air stewardesses. Remember when Tegan welcomed Turlough so warmly into the TARDIS in Terminus (‘I don’t trust you! You’re up to something!’) well she manages to trump that with Kamelion (‘You can have my room for all I care!’). Seriously, who would want to know this misanthrope unless you had a persecution complex?

Over the Shoulder: Turlough has just been introduced, his murderous secret exposed and now he is a fully fledged member of the TARDIS team! So what do they do to show off his talents…give him hardly any lines, no character development whatsoever and make him completely irrelevant to the plot. What on Earth is going on with this script editor? Saward later complains that they never gave Mark Strickson anything decent to do...why not? It wouldn’t be so bad but he suffers the same fate in The Five Doctors (stuck in the TARDIS with nothing to do), Warriors of the Deep (wandering corridors and not connecting with the plot), The Awakening (locked up in a shed for two episodes) and Resurrection of the Daleks (wandering about with a cloth over his mouth discovering bodies and little more). What is the point of bringing in this character if you aren’t going to do anything with him? His one contribution is to call the Master ‘the EVIL ONE!’ despite the fact he has never met him before or even knows who he is. Unless the Doctor has a spotters guide to villains that he takes all his new companions through when they are officially welcomed on board. Turlough is the only character that hasn’t gotten involved in all the melodramatic shouting so he finally snaps with: ‘I’ve had quite enough of you WHOEVER YOU ARE! So don’t try me TOO FAR!’ Poor Mark Strickson, he deserves better work than this. Even the Doctor is embarrassed, encouraging him back into the TARDIS before he explodes like a supernova of Brian Blessed proportions. 

The Bearded Wonder: ‘You insult ze King!’ says the Master in his least effective disguise of all time (yes, somehow he manages to inch out Kalid with this ginger squirrel stuck on his face). Obviously he has a desire (much like the Doctor) to turn ginger one day and sports a flame red beard and wig as he ingratiates himself into court with his dastardly French accent! Ainley can clearly deliver the goods (his performances in The Keeper of Traken, Castrovalva and Survival prove that) but he and the writers have gotten themselves into a lazy rut where the character simply turns up at the most implausible of times (Prehistoric Earth! The Industrial Revolution! The court of King John!) in the most ridiculous of disguises (‘Shazam! Peshwari Naan!’ says Kalid, the fat oriental Buddha, ‘Hehehe!’ chuckles a scarecrow waiting for years in a field for the Doctor to arrive, ‘I fear now hell hounds!’ says Sir Giles Estram, the ginger bearded wonder) with the daftest of excuses (‘I will harness the power of the Xeraphin!’, ‘One that encompasses the whole human race!’, ‘Chaos shall reign and I shall be its Emperor!’). What a tired saggy old scrotum of a villain he has become. Strangely the Master’s cod French accent seems to verge into Indian on the odd occasion (‘That of the King...’). You have to wonder if the Master has asked the local witch to cast a glamour on him or something otherwise what happens to all that ginger hair when he transforms? I think I would have been more impressed if Anthony Ainley just happened to be playing another character (badly). It would have been far more surprising considering the slapdash approach to disguising him (it looks like JNT and Anthony Ainley took a day trip to a fancy dress shop and just slapped a few bits on). It makes the Doctor and his companions look completely daft for not recognising him. More to the point why does the Master need to disguise himself at all if he doesn’t know the Doctor is coming? Or are they linked cosmically some how like Time Lord magnets so he always makes proviso’s just in case? He laughs like a true pantomime villain (it's something like ‘hahackhehehehe!’ and not just LAUGHING as the DVD subtitles insists). ‘Hehehehe!’ he giggles again as de Lacey is shot down, laughter seemingly the bulk of his dialogue. Think of all the things that the Master could have done with a shapeshifting robot. Why he chooses this period is baffling when he could have returned to Gallifrey and caused havoc with Kamelion baffles me. At the climax the Master seems to have a ‘trap behind that trap that would have been a joy to spring’ to stop the Doctor escaping but the story doesn’t even cut back to him as if we are to just take for granted that he was defeated once again and is standing there in his TARDIS fuming saying something like ‘You tricky Time Lord! I will destroy every molecule of your being next time!’ Like Davison’s Doctor, he feels past his best in this story.And pure pantomime.

Dreadful Dialogue: ‘This is useless in your hands – you have moral scruples!’ – is this dialogue actually being written by a human being?
‘To serve the Devilish Doctor’s own purpose!’
‘Quite Masterly!’
‘I must distract them somehow!’ – people are talking stage directions now!
‘Fools! Medieval misfits!’

The Good: The location work around the castle is quite pretty but it is shot in such a workmanlike way that much of the areas beauty is lost on the camera.

The Bad: Why go to the lengths of dressing up the banquet sets with such detail and filming it in such pantomimic way? It feels as if we are slipping in on a local pageant rather than a serious period drama. The scenes in the castle are gagging to be shot on film but instead they look exactly what they are…cardboard interior sets. The stylophonic twing twangs of the incidental music are enough to make you wonder if this is actually taking place on an alien planet rather than in Earth’s history – there can be no other explanation for such an artificial score when it is crying out for an instrumental one. Not that I would want to endure more episodes of this nonsense but the two episode format really works against this story because there just isn’t time to develop any of the characters, to give them personalities or histories or to indulge in any period detail and discussion. It renders the whole setting utterly redundant. We’re given no reason to care about any of the characters because they all behave so irrationally – Hugh tries to torture Turlough for no reason, Ranulf barges into the Doctor’s room with his sword drawn – it feels as if we have walked into the middle of a story of which we have absolutely no context. The fight scenes are a joke; when the Lady Isabella is brought to the dungeon you can see all the actors finding their marks for the fight (I use the term loosely) to begin. Even the continuity is dreadful with Sir Gilles outside guarding the castle and in the very next scene he is at the King’s side at the banquet with no indication that any time has past. How exactly does the Doctor know the Master wants to rid the world of Magna Carta? They haven’t uttered a single word on the subject. By stating it is ‘small time villainy’ even the writer is admitting that this plot is shite. I’ve said again and again…so why not one more time. They introduce this rather cumbersome robot with shapeshifting powers and realise the robot is actually unusable…so why didn’t they just hire a new actor each week to play Kamelion? What a fun idea that would be. The possibilities are endless and yet Saward seems to enjoy shying away from them. Perhaps he just didn't think of it.

The Shallow Bit: What is up with the wench on the King’s left during the early duel scenes? An uglier broad I never did see – with that pushed up nose and bad teeth she looks like Tubbs from The League of Gentlemen! Tegan’s top is quite similar to the sixth Doctor’s coat in that it resembles a the colours and texture of a good bout of sick that somebody has made yucky patterns with. It does nothing for her in the slightest. There’s a really odd scene where the Doctor and Tegan are covered in duvets on location and Turlough stands there freezing his butt off in his school uniform! ‘You’re getting old Doctor, your will is weak!’ has gone down in infamy!

Result: Peter Davison has made no secret that he thinks Terrance Dudley’s scripts for his era were workmanlike but that expression suggests some level of competence but the sheer retardness that holds this story together boggles the mind. The Hartnell historicals are amongst my favourite Who adventures for their scope, detail, atmosphere and emotive storytelling but this sorry tale reveals that all of those skills have been lost as the genre became unpopular and all you are left with is a stagey pantomime that lacks even basic conviction. The setting is poor, the dialogue is enough to get stuck in your throat, the characters are vacuous and unbelievable and the plot isn’t worth wasting your time with. Like The Arc of Infinity that opened this season it fails to work even as a really entertaining slice of crap Doctor Who (in the same way that The Chase and Time and the Rani succeed admirably!) and it commits the ultimate sin – its boring. Failing as a drama, a period piece and even as a Doctor Who story, The King’s Demons is almost entirely without merit and a piss poor ending to the 20th year: 2/10


The Five Doctors written by Terrance Dicks and directed by Peter Moffatt

This story in a nutshell: ‘The Doctor has been taken out of time…’

Hmm: Lovely to see Hartnell appear at the beginning of the story and that his contribution to the series is acknowledged. It’s a brilliantly chosen clip too, a moment that saw us experience the Doctor’s first life changing decision on screen. It’s a first rate spot of acting from Hartnell too without a fluff in sight. Some people refuse to enjoy Richard Hurndall’s performance as the first Doctor but I think he achieves an extraordinary amount of authenticity in the role. Of course I would have given my right arm to see Hartnell reprise the role but that was never going to be possible and Hurndall brings to the role all the gruffness and authority I associate with Hartnell and at the same time manages to make the role his own. I find him thoroughly engaging in the part. It's great that the first Doctor ignores the feelings of fear that the Dark Tower provokes – at his age there’s little left to worry about. His interaction with Tegan is interesting because it is clear he is not going to put up with any of her nonsense.  It’s entirely appropriate that the first Doctor is the one who figures out what the old proverb means and foils Borusa.He shows all these young (or rather old) whippersnappers that first is best.

Oh My Giddy Aunt: Not allowed? He’s allowed everywhere! Troughton is such a shameless scene stealer and in all honesty none of the others had much of a chance when once he turned up. Of all of the returning Doctors he is the one who seems to be enjoying himself the most and his scenes with Nicholas Courtney are delightfully warm and wonderful to watch. His replacement was pretty unpromising, he says naughtily. The Brigadier thinks he is in pain when he’s trying to sing the nursery rhyme that conceals the information to gain access to the Dark Tower. I want a galactic glitter! Wonderfully Troughton barges between Hurndall and Pertwee making his presence felt and then hides behind them later when Rassilon offers them immortality.He's so cheeky you almost long for him to be the frontrunner for this show again.

Good Grief: If the third Doctor hadn’t been introduced flying around corners in Bessie I would have been disappointed but his line of ‘Great balls of fire!’ sounds oddly out of character considering the script editor of his era put the line in his mouth. As soon as he hooks up with Sarah Jane that dazzling season eleven chemistry sparks up between them (Sarah is so happy to see him but its not long before she’s having a go!). He’s quite pig headed in refusing to believe the Master is there to help him but given their history you can’t really blame them. The Doctor happily pointing out that he was right and Sarah was wrong feels authentically Pertwee. Naturally he thinks they will get the inscription wrong without his help. The third Doctor rubs his neck thoughtfully whilst declaring ‘there’s something wrong, you know!’

Fair Fellow: Poor Peter Davison is left clutching his chest and vanishing on the TARDIS floor whilst all his previous selves get to have all the fun.  I can’t help but laugh…I’ve always been a hit or miss kind of guy with the fifth Doctor but when he started fading away I can barely say I noticed the difference between this and his occasionally vacuous characterisation! Fortunately one mellows with age…hmm...but that shouldn't be to the point of indolence. If he wasn’t dull enough he’s the poor sod who gets lumbered with the scenes on Gallifrey. The youngest model and certainly the most impudent. It's lovely how Davison alters his performance to say goodbye to his previous selves; coughing like Hurndall, giddy like Troughton and gentlemanly like Pertwee. The thought of having to return to his own people and take charge terrifies him to the extent that once again he goes on the run from his own people ‘in a rackety old TARDIS!’

The Doctor’s friends: If I was planning on writing a review that exceeds the length of all the others put together I would have a little section for every single companion. But I want to finish it tonight. What’s this? Tegan smiling in her first scene, asking to stay where they have landed and describing it as beautiful – this must be something special! Or perhaps it makes a world of difference having a writer of the calibre of Terrance Dicks penning her. And Turlough has taken up art as a hobby but judging by the Doctor’s reaction he should stick to assassination. The Brigadier is back on UNIT territory. Nice to see the K.9 and Company continuity creeping into the series and thank goodness it did or we might not have enjoyed all those priceless K.9 scenes in The Sarah Jane Adventures. Who could be more appropriate to lie back and enjoy the beauty of somewhere as romantic and intellectual as Cambridge than Romana? Have you ever known a woman toss away her handbag in a moment of danger as Sarah does here? My friends would have to be unconscious to prise their purses from their hands…and even then it would be a struggle. Finally someone to put Tegan in her place! Her scenes with the first Doctor are an absolute delight (‘Now look young lady make yourself useful!’) and you can see how a far more authoritative presence in the TARDIS would have made this era far more amusing (it actually makes me wonder how much fun a sixth Doctor/Tegan combination might have been). Turlough is such a pansy boy of course he has to make the tea! Sarah snatches the Seal of Rassilon pretty quickly from the Doctor – now we know how she could afford that fabulous house on Bannerman Road. The Brigadier doesn’t seem half as clueless as he used to be, clearly he’s used to this lark by now. In a celebration of all that is wonderful about Doctor Who somebody had to twist their ankle and it feels right that it should be Susan (she always was useless). Poor Turlough is lumbered with the Nyssa role stuck in the TARDIS whilst everyone else is off having fun. Tegan still hasn’t quite got the hang of this futuristic technology (remember when she stared in astonishment in Four to Doomsday gasping ‘look a door!’) and she gapes in astonishment at ‘an entry coder!’ Surely Tegan knows some basic mathematics? She looks genuinely devastated that it could soon be goodbye – who ever knew that she cared?

The Bearded Wonder: Survival aside this is clearly Anthony Ainley’s finest story as the Master. In the hands of the script editor who knows the character better than anyone the Master is cheeky, gleefully mocking and given a deliciously ironic plotline. During the scenes on Gallifrey Ainley is chundering on the scenery and makes the dull old politics an absolute riot. Just look at his delighted expression when the Time Lords read out all the evil crimes he is responsible for! He seems to love the paradox of being asked to rescue the Doctor as much as the audience do. When I first watched this story with Simon he fell to pieces at the Master’s pantomime reaction to the transmat device and to this day Simon does boggle eyed Master impressions whenever I am feeling low to cheer me up. He’s enjoying himself immensely as he drives the Cybermen like sheep across a minefield and then takes great delight in gunning down the Cyberleader. What a nut job. Give the man a clap for stretching‘immmmortality!’ to a new Guinness World Record of syllabic length for a single word. 

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Wonderful chap. All of them.’
‘Doctor look out! Cybermen!’ – come on you know you love that line!
‘Sorry must dash!’
‘The Black Scrolls of Rassilon!’ ‘Interesting, I thought they were out of print.’
‘No, not the mind probe!’
‘On the other hand where there’s a wind there’s a way!’
‘Big, isn’t it?’
‘How long d’you plan to play pitch’n’toss?’
‘Or I shall destroy you! – the schoolboy bullying tone of the Cyberleader makes this line an instant winner!
‘He knew full well that immortality was a curse, not a blessing…’
‘Splendid fellows - all of you.’
‘Why not? That’s how it all started!’

The Good Stuff: As ever with these things I am watching the DVD special edition because I want the fullest possible experience. I know Peter Moffatt has argued strongly that this isn’t his vision of The Five Doctors but to put it simply it is all material is shot by him and the opening shots of this edition taking us for a chilling tour through the corridors of the Dark Tower is so infinitely superior to the transmitted version (the Doctor dusting the console) my decision was easily made. The Eye of Orion scenes might look like a wet weekend in Wales but it does genuinely feel remote and fresh and beautiful – for once we experience a location the Doctor enthuses about. Of all the stories to introduce the spanking new console in this was the right choice and it is a brilliant piece of design with so many screens and buttons – any kid would give their right arm to have a tinker. It seems like old tat now but take yourself back to being a kid and surely the thought of a mysterious dark figure kidnapping all these Doctors and companions and placing them on a chessboard within the Death Zone. It's an ingenious concept that Dicks provides to give JNT his greatest wish, a splurge of continuity, and it makes the story work within a dramatic structure. Having David Saville back in the scene that introduces Troughton’s Doctor (he played Carstairs in The War Games) was a great touch. Peter Howell’s creepy, dynamic, exciting and thoroughly atmospheric score is one of my favourites. It’s interesting that the Shada sequences are directed by Pennant Roberts who along with Moffatt are considered amongst the worst of the eighties directors and yet their styles match beautifully here with long, lingering exterior shots at sumptuous locations – these sequences showing the fourth Doctor and Romana punting down the Cam slot into this story seamlessly and it is a joy that such delightful material finally sees the light of day. Who said Moffatt cannot produce an atmosphere? Go watch the scene where the TARDIS lands in the Death Zone and the scanner opens to reveal the Dark Tower and that unforgettable fog horn of Rassilon. Lots of shadows and lightning atmospherics in the scenes where the first Doctor and Susan reunite (the Dalek shadow on the wall is especially effective). There’s a wonderfully gross moment when the Dalek explodes and the mutant writhes about as green goo dribbles from its casing. There really is a remarkable amount of location work in this story, isn’t there? The slate quarry the second Doctor and the Brig find themselves in is truly desolate and uninviting and look at those horrid gnarled trees that Bessie drives by – where do they find such weird landscapes. Oh yeah, Wales. The Cybermen look really menacing on that misty hillside when they talk to the Master. The Raston Warrior Robot is still one of the finest Doctor Who creations; balletic, deadly and with some nasty armaments – the scene when it dispatches an entire platoon of Cybermen is unforgettably exciting. The long shot of the Tomb of Rassilon feels vast.

Lots of lovely moments that make you beam with fanboy delight – the first Doctor, Susan and the TARDIS in the same shot, the second Doctor and the Brig with Cybermen recalling The Invasion, the third Doctor meeting the Cybermen and tidying up that little gap plus his and Sarah’s magical meeting with Ainley’s Master (lovely to see Pertwee and Delgado meet and Sarah only missed a meeting with the Doctor’s arch enemy by three stories one side of her tenure and one story at the other end!). Susan seeing the Master is another great moment as is the second Doctor, the Brigadier and the Yeti (the conditions under which they first met). The first Doctor seeing the Cybermen is like a portent of his own death. Even though they are phantoms it's wonderful to see Mike Yates and Liz Shaw together only missing each other by one story in the Pertwee era. The meeting between Tegan and Sarah is unfortunate however as the dazzling past meets the unfortunate present (although neither of them is especially good at silent gossiping). The Brigadier meeting Sarah and Tegan shows how long his association with the Doctor has been and it wouldn’t have been quiet right had Pertwee and Courtney not had a moment together. The Brig gets to punch the Master – yay!

The Bad Stuff: Is the pathetic trickle from the Fountain of Rassilon supposed to suggest the grandeur of Gallifrey? Despite some attempts to bling up the sets a tad the Gallifrey scenes still feel every bit as artificial and studio bound as they did in Arc of Infinity. Poor Sarah Jane falling down that incline and needing to be pulled up and over by Bessie – I realise this was supposed to be a mountainous drop but unsympathetic direction means that the unthinkable happens, Sarah is made to look pathetic. Has there ever been a more 1980s scene than Tegan, Turlough and Susan gossiping on wicker furniture and drinking synthetic looking drinks? Nice of Rassilon to provide some roads in the Death Zone. How blind must the Doctor and the Master be to miss that Cyberman who comes strolling out of the rocks? The Doctor accuses a rather important Time Lord of abusing the Time Scoop and Peter Davison realises a little too late that he is staring directly at the only suspect so he quickly looks at Flavia and the Castellan too. The framing of the Castellan is pointless padding. The abseiling sequence is deeply implausible given how it is shot. In Simon’s words the first Doctor walking casually over the chessboard of death pretending he is worked out its secrets is ‘a load of sweaty bollocks!’ Is this proof that the second Doctor had a life after The War Games or is his spelling out of the events in his last story a tragic continuity error on Dicks’ part? The Lord President was behind it all along, how unsurprising! I suppose given his four incarnations on TV he had to turn rogue at some point. Are the Doctors’ memories erased when they return to their own time otherwise why don’t the 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5th Doctors remember the events of this story?

The Shallow Bit: Proof if it was needed that our Sarah Jane was influenced by the tragic fashions of the 1980s and her frilly pink blouse, purple carrier bag mac and attached mittens are all hideous! I think she might have been at the red hair dye too. In her crazy clothes and severe haircut Tegan looks more a like a militant lesbian than ever. Zoe is clothed in bubble wrap.

Result: Somehow (and please don’t ask me how) this doesn’t feel like Terrance Dicks has dumped a load of Doctors, companions and monsters together but a rock solid narrative with clear plot progression and plenty of space for great set pieces. If you ever needed proof of the skill of this writer then bask at this menagerie of continuity and how well it all hangs together. The Five Doctors is ridiculously entertaining and in many places inspired and it gives every participant a priceless moment. Of the Doctors Troughton shines brightest and Davison the dullest, Hurndall does a mighty fine job considering what he has to live up to and Pertwee is as effortlessly solid as ever. It’s a wonderful story for Ainley’s Master too who manages to weave his way through the story outshining all the monsters on display. The production is similarly impressive with some stunningly bleak locations that really sell the danger of the Death Zone. With more great lines you can possibly handle, so many delightful old faces back and a real sense of occasion, the 20th anniversary special is non stop fun from beginning to end: 9/10

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