Series Five

Enter Matt Smith as the mad man in a box taking a little girl on the adventure of a lifetime! The Doctor and Amy face the Atraxi, the Smilers, Daleks in war time, the Weeping Angels, Vampires in Venice, the Dream Lord, Silurians, a Grefaius, a Silence spaceship and a whole menagerie of monsters waiting to bring him down!

The regulars -





















The Eleventh Hour written by Steven Moffatt and directed by Adam Smith

TO BE REVIEWED...

The Beast Below written by Stephen Moffatt and directed by Andrew Gunn

Result: So many unanswered questions, undeveloped characters and gaping holes in logic, this doesn’t feel like a Steven Moffat script at all after his superlative efforts in the RTD years. The Beast Below is crying out for more time and a slower pace out and explore its ideas, to fill in some very important details and iron out our understanding of this world. I love the idea of Starship UK but the realisation, both on the page and on screen, leave a lot to be desired. It needs a bigger budget to bring its ideas to life and more of a chance for its (criminally wasted) guest stars to shine. It should have been superb but its frustrating and vague, selling itself on half arsed emotional moments that prove that Moffat simply cannot pull at the heartstrings in the same way that his predecessor did. Script editor Brian Minchin needed to be much tougher on this one and should have requested a rewrite to inject more richness in the plotting and the characterisation. I get the impression that Moffat was hoping that he could present a really cool idea for a story like a magician (and let's face it something akin to New York floating on the back of a Star Whale is pretty damn cool) and hoped nobody prodded to deeply beneath the surface. Matt Smith continues to compel but isn't helped by a script that makes his Doctor look thick and reactionary and for show runner Steven Moffat this is the first sign of fatigue that would set in as he takes on a weight of responsibility with the show. The difference in what he can produce when somebody else has to worry about the everyday running of Doctor Who and he can pour his heart and soul into one script per season is a universe away from his efforts when he is both answerable for the show but also the most prolific writer. It's the same amount of talent that is injected into one classic tale that is spread about in five or six scripts a year and the latter suffer as a result. The Beast Below is the first example but there would be plenty more to come (A Good Man Goes to War, The Doctor, The Widow & The Wardrobe, The Bells of St John, Time and the Doctor). Re-watching this it reminds me strongly of a Sylvester McCoy adventure, outwardly stylish and wanting to impress (a bit like a cute puppy jumping at your knees) but not having the narrative chops or budget to quite pull it off: 5/10

Full Review Here - http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.com/2014/06/the-beast-below-written-by-stephen.html

Victory of the Daleks written by Mark Gatiss and directed by Andrew Gunn

Result: Another Moffat era that has gone down in my estimation, Victory of the Daleks has not aged well at all. Maybe it has something to do with the waste of a perfectly good premise (Churchill's secret weapon) for a far more ridiculous one (the new Daleks supplanted the old ones) or maybe it is because the design of the new Daleks was so ineffective that the production team immediately tried to backtrack and return to the original, Davies ones, as soon as they possibly could. It's a wartime story being told in the broadest of strokes, lacking any serious detail or education and far more invested in the bank holiday spectacle that these sorts of films have to offer. You've got Ian McNiece and Bill Patterson, two extremely strong actors, being wasted on roles that have no great depth or lasting worth to them. Matt Smith is single handedly trying to hold the story together but he can't quite manage it this time...and he still can't portray anger with any great conviction and Karen Gillan is at her least offensive but that is because Amy is given practically nothing to do. I should point out that the first 15 minutes do show some potential but as soon as the Doctor is transported up to the Dalek ship the story dive bombs into a well of decrepitude. Remembered as the story that rivals Daleks in Manhattan/Evolution of the Daleks as the worst new series Dalek story, personally I would rate it lower because even the direction of Victory is awkward and unsure of itself. With a script like this to realise, I am not at all surprised: 4/10

Full Review Here: http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.co.uk/2014/09/victory-of-daleks-written-by-mark.html

The Time of Angels/Flesh and Stone written by Steven Moffatt and directed by Adam Smith

Result: My favourite story of season five, Steven Moffatt has written a near-flawless script which is is skin crawlingly scary and epic in scope and packed it full of memorable characters who all get a moment to shine. It's one of the only times he has managed to pull off a really strong narrative and a substantial character tale during his era. Adam Smith deserves a medal for his avant garde direction, the production is approaching movie standard and there are plenty of delicious visuals and set pieces to devour. The atmosphere is tense and frightening; my friends daughter was traumatised by the first episode, literally petrified. Her mother was left in quite a state too. Few Doctor Who stories are as dynamic was this without jettisoning their integrity and it manages to feel traditional (dark tunnels, ship under siege) and uniquely NuWho at the same time (exquisitely realised, achingly emotional). This is the point where the bubbling arc plots are at their most mouth watering and I don’t think the season is this interesting again until the finale. Moffat promises is stacking up his mysteries and promising an awful lot. That he fails to deliver isn't a problem at all here because (like the early X-Files seasons) it feels like we are riding the wave of a genuinely exciting and mammoth arc. If they don’t rival their initial appearance the Angels are consistently innovated throughout and provide more than enough chills to justify their return. Suitably, this story also showcases the eleventh Doctor at his finest. If only we could jettison Amy and replace her with a human being for a companion we would be in perfect shape. What a shame the bolted on final scene should leave me on such a sour note after so much richness: 9.5/10 

Full Review Here: http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.co.uk/2016/01/the-time-of-angelsflesh-and-stone.html

The Vampires of Venice written by Toby Whithouse and directed by Jonny Campbell

Result: Visually stunning but morally corrupt…have we wandered into an episode of Torchwood? This was one of the most disappointing episodes of the season for so many reasons, chief amongst them being the fact that it promised far more than it delivered. The elements of the title whet the appetite but what transpires is less of a vampire tale and more of a traditional Doctor Who monster of the week and despite the suggestion it doesn’t capture the essence or the magic of Venice in the slightest (I say that as Venice is my home from home). Toby Whithouse rejects the gothic trappings that could have sold this adventure and instead chooses to fill in the cracks with an appallingly handled domestic drama that charts the character assassination of Amy Pond. About the only person who emerges from this episode intact is Matt Smith who waltzes through the forgettable events with glee; playful, silly, powerful and truly embracing the role of a lifetime. There’s nothing wrong with a little brainless escapism every once and a while but this is so undemanding and predictable it leaves no room for surprises or even much entertainment. The odd witty line and sumptuous visual is in evidence but there is so little of substance here and bringing Rory into the fold means that this isn’t even an episode that you can avoid during a rewatch. At least Murray Gold is having a field day: 4/10

Full Review Here - http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.com/2014/06/the-vampires-of-venice-written-by-toby.html

Amy’s Choice written by Simon Nye and directed by Catherine Morshead

This story in a nutshell: ‘Amy’s men, Amy’s choice…’

The Nutty Professor: Highlighting the differences between the ‘never looking back’ tenth Doctor we open this story with the eleventh Doctor visiting Amy and Rory five years after they left him. When he sees Amy’s life in the dullest village known to man he wonders what they do to stave off the self-harm. He threw the TARDIS manual into a supernova because he was cross and he disagreed with it. Not even the Doctor can withstand the charms of a nice old lady who wants you to try on a woolly jumper for size. The Dream Lord is instantly charismatic and insulting, taking the piss out of the Doctor’s many ridiculous nicknames. The madcap vehicle, the cocamene hair, the clothes designed by a first year fashion student…if he had any more tawdry quirks he could open a tawdry quirk shop. He sniffs out things that aren’t exactly as they seem. Why does everybody expect him to always know everything? Fascinating that the Doctor figures out who the Dream Lord is on the strength of how much he hates him and that opens up a whole universe of possibilities about the Doctor’s level of self hate post the Time War. That might have been worth examining further but it is never touched upon again. The old man that prefers the company of the young? Ouch Amy has really put the Doctor on a pedestal and when he cannot save Rory she questions what the point of him is.  Like he is responsible for everybody in the universe. I would have reciprocated that sentiment and aked what the point of her is. Matt Smith’s quiet ‘okay’ as Amy reveals that she wants to kill herself in this reality because she cannot bear a life without Rory is desperately sweet. You just want to hug him. The darkness in Amy and Rory would have starved the Dream Lord because the Doctor chooses his friends very carefully but in over 900 years to choose from the Doctor was a feast. The last shot is very telling – the Doctor still has his own demons to face and the Dream Lord is waiting…

Scots Tart: This episode was the making of Amy for me, the point where I could actually see some potential in the character beyond being aggression and flirtation. It's at this point where she stops being a generic Scots redhead with an attitude problem and over excited libido and actually becomes a character with some degree of consideration. Why is it that the guest writers are bringing this character to life with so much more effectiveness than the showrunner? Amy screams so loud she scares a crow from a tree. How funny does she look with the bowl of pudding mix perched on top of her pregnant stomach and rampantly stuffing her face with mixture? Equally hilarious is her fake pregnancy moment when she manages to turn the Doctor as white as a sheet with a simple scream. It’s fascinating that when Amy has to make her choice before both men she says Rory but doesn’t even look at him. She’s gone from the day before her wedding to telling her fiancé they will get married ‘some day.’ Amy’s casual ‘whack her!’ makes me wet myself. Sometimes her bossiness is amusing rather than annoying. There is more insane humour as she does her little poncho boys dance. The Dream Lord manages to get to nub of this seasons problem: Amy ran away with a handsome hero and would she really give that up to be with a bumbling country doctor who thinks the only thing you need to remain interesting is a ponytail? Interesting that Amy doesn’t like being asked to make a choice of which life is the real one. Both are enticing to her. The big question is does Amy really deserve Rory when she only realises how much she loves him after he dies…and that it takes two attempts at this to really drive the point home? If real life is the world where Rory is dead Amy doesn’t want it and she makes an unforgettable decision to kill herself and make the other world a reality. I do question the sanity of making the nature of Amy and Rory's relationship her choice because she really doesn't deserve it given her behaviour over the past couple of episodes.

The Loyal Roman: Rory’s ponytail has to be seen to be believed (by Amy also it seems who takes a sly look behind his back the first time they wake up in the TARDIS). Rory, bless him, is so deluded that he thinks the Doctor is the gooseberry in the TARDIS. He wants the village lifestyle so badly and he is convinced that it is reality. All of Rory’s dreams are encapsulated in seeing the nursery for their baby and Arthur Darvil captures your sympathies effortlessly as he sags over the crib. Amy’s reaction to him cutting his ponytail gets me every time, it's such an oddly tender moment.


Sparkling Dialogue: ‘You’ve swallowed a planet!’
‘When worlds collide!’
‘You can’t spot a dream while you’re having it…’
‘Time to sleep…or are you waking up?’
‘It can be the night before our wedding for as long as we want!’
‘Loves a redhead our naughty Doctor. Has he told you about Elizabeth the First? Well she thought she was the first…’
‘You’re probably a vegetarian aren’t you, you big flop haired wuss!’

The Good Stuff: Straight away we are back in a lovely green environment – this really is the season of the scenic country landscapes and villages and I just happen to find charming. I love the camera shot that comes over the side to slowly reveal Amy’s pregnancy, that’s some clever camera work that expertly reveals a plot point. I also like how the pollen falls through the Leadworth scenes almost imperceptibly (you could almost mistake it for light rain most of the time). You have three distinct personalities in the TARDIS now; Rory thinks of their life in a sweet little village being married to Amy as a dream come to true, to the Doctor it was a nightmare and as far as Amy was concerned she was the size of a house. It's brilliant to spend so much time in the new TARDIS giving the audience a chance to get used to the feel and size of it and it is interesting that when the ship loses its power and is plunged into darkness it is far more atmospheric than the last time they tried to do this (Rise of the Cybermen). Without a doubt Toby Jones gives one of the finest villain performances since the series came back, he’s a delight to watch and sports some very witty dialogue. Jones is such a strong performer anyway but matched with Nye's sharp dialogue they are practically untoppleable. Nice to see that the Doctor is still concocting weird devices out of household objects (this time a corkscrew and a whisk) ala The Time Monster. A cold star is another simple but effective fantasy idea in this fairytale season, the Ship is literally drifting towards a cold sun. There is a magical shot of the TARDIS approaching the star with ice crystals bursting on its shell. The march of the octogenarians is very quirky, I was cheering upon the first broadcast. Ice can burn and sofas can read dont’cha know? How funny is it when the Doctor knocks that old woman off the roof – it’s so wrong but I can’t help but laugh! The cut from Amy driving the van into the cottage to the snow crusted console room is one of the best scenes of the year and the imagery is unforgettable.

The Bad Stuff: People bemoan that the psychic pollen explanation is disappointing but the method for whipping up their dream state isn’t important. It’s the character work that is important. I still find Amy an irritant, despite the good work that is done here. It's probably irrational on my part but I just cannot warm to this character.

Result: Nice to see the old ‘sideways’ adventures leaking back into the series and this is a particularly good example. The premise is so simple; two worlds and one of them is a dream and our heroes have to figure out which one is which. It brings to the surface a whole universe of feelings that exists between the three main characters and finally puts to rest the three in a bed tack that has been plaguing the last few episodes. Murray Gold provides a memorable score and the episode is full of unusual imagery but what really impressed me was the wealth of quality dialogue that Simon Nye conjures. This is only Doctor Who to mention self-harm, feature old ladies being up, ends in suicide (twice over) and explores just how much the Doctor might hate himself. It wont be to everybody’s tastes because there is a distinct lack of traditional elements but I found the character work enchanting and the layered plot one of the most successful of the year. The direction is occasionally stilted and I am naturally irritated by anything that has 'Amy' in the title but those were the only issues I could find with this oddball piece. I would love to see the Dream Lord back again: 8/10

The Hungry Earth/Cold Blood written by Chris Chibnall and directed by Ashley Way

Result: A missed opportunity and the first mid season two parter in the new series to disappoint. Weirdly enough considering I am usually pumping for the opposite, The Hungry Earth/Cold Blood could probably do with being condensed down into one hour long episode and having all of the flab cut away. There is much that works in this two parter (the return of the Silurians is triumphant for instance) but also a great deal that I found wanting (the dullest family unit ever seen in Doctor Who) and as a whole I felt that it was let down by too much running time and a script editor that wasn’t forceful enough in tightening up the script. The Hungry Earth is by far the most superior of the two episodes with some deliciously atmospheric and frightening moments (the Silurians hunting at night) but the plodding pace and relative cheapness of the second half left me clock watching by the end. The characterisation isn’t strong enough to justify and explore the moral implications of Chibnall is juggling and the whole piece eventually devolves into the usual cowboys vs Indians in corridors shtick. I really enjoy the exploits of Madame Vestra and her gang but the one downside to come out of that is that the Silurians (and the Sontarans by default) who were initially introduced as a potential threat are only though of in terms of allies these days. A shame because there is something very sinister about them that I feel like we are missing out on. Like us and yet entirely dissimilar. Perhaps it should be explored again at some point. There was a chance with this two parter to genuine innovate the series, to re-introduce the Silurians permanently and see how humanity copes sharing the planet with another species. It would have made the contemporary Earth stories an absolutely fascinating exercise. Instead Chibnall seems happy to flirt with the ideas (briefly) and then toss them over his shoulder and get back to the running about in caves. There’s nothing more frustrating than potential being wasted (go and watch Star Trek Voyager and you can experience this aggravation for seven seasons) but in the case of The Hungry Earth and Cold Blood it is Doctor Who daring to suggest something bold and then just ignoring it, that’s just maddening. It isn’t even as though there was a dramatic reason for the alliance to discontinue (like an explosion that wipes the species out), Chibnall just sends them back to sleep again and leaves the problem in someone else’s hands. If average Doctor Who is made up of a mixture of great elements and poor ones, then this might stand as the most average Doctor Who of them all but for squandering a potentially riveting scenario I cannot award any more than: 4/10

Full Review Here - http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/the-hungry-earthcold-blood-written-by.html

Vincent and the Doctor written by Richard Curtis and directed by Jonny Campbell

This story in a nutshell: The title says it all…

Nutty Professor: Whilst I was already convinced this was the episode that my mom finally fell in love with Matt Smith as the Doctor and got over her pining for David Tennant. The almost flirtatious way that the Doctor and the museum guide admire each others bow ties always makes me smile. He’s not that kind of Doctor. Matt Smith seems to revel in any chance to be a bit silly and yet he never comes across as being frivolously so (a far cry from his later seasons) and so the energetic way he dashes around the courtyard waving the pole around to attack the invisible creature is quite the delight. He takes absolute delight in tossing old junk out of the way so he can look for his invisible alien detector, which apparently was a gift from his Godmother. His experiences are that surprisingly there is always hope despite all the terrible things that he has seen. Fascinating to see that whilst the Doctor is confident at confronting whole armies (such as he will in a few episodes time) but when it comes to one mentally ill man he is awkward and shy. The Doctor is armed with over confidence, a briefcase and a small screwdriver. His camp little dancing to the soothing music of the TARDIS makes me want to kiss him. When Paul Cornell talks about Sylvester McCoy being all sweet and retired and so easy to fall in love with (something I occasionally saw) I apply exactly the same description to Matt Smith in this episode. I'm not sure there is another moment where he is more comfortable playing the Doctor and it's the most unconventional episode of all.

Scots Tart: The Doctor is being super nice to Amy at the moment and taking her exactly where she wants to go and she smells a rat. Naturally. Amy’s one moment of ‘can't she get swallowed by a Bandril?' (trust me to only have one in an episode is a rare and treasurable thing) was when she told Van Gogh and the bar owner to both shut up and she will buy the drinks. It's that smug, superior tone that grates and the way she thinks she can talk to anybody the way she likes. But as I said, it's just one moment in an otherwise faultless episode for the character. For the most part she is desperately sweet and sensitive. See - it can be done! She knows that Vincent will take his own life but when the Doctor puts it into words she cannot handle it especially when he says it will be in only a few months time. It's one of those times when your foreknowledge of the future is extremely painful. Amy suggests that she is not really the marrying kind, another subtle touch of the arc not getting in anyone’s way. Amy looks genuinely pained that they didn’t manage to save Vincent from committing suicide and the Doctor’s attempts to cheer her up are some of their nicest moments together. I don't think I ever liked Amy more than the moment where she sheds a tear for her lost Rory without even knowing who he is.


Earless Artist: It's one of those freak occurrences that the person who happens to be the spitting image of the historical character just happens to be the best person for the part. The year before his death is described as ‘the most astonishing outpouring of art in history.’ In his lifetime he was a commercial disaster, selling only one portrait to the sister of a friend. The pre-credits sequence gives you everything you need to know about Van Gogh before we meet him and taps into your sympathies for the man effortlessly. He’s come to accept that the one person who is going to truly appreciate his paintings is him. You forget that Van Gogh doesn’t know how revered his artwork will be and the Doctor and Amy’s horrified reaction to him daubing white paint all over a picture to draw the creature really brings it home. Sunflowers are disgusting and a challenge, this man is truly a genius. With the Doctor he has fought monster together and won and on his own he fears that he will not do as well. To use your pain to portray the magnificence of the world is Vincent Van Gogh’s gift to the art world and to the human race. This is an extraordinary study of an extraordinary man, one that refuses to shy away from the horrors that he faced in life and celebrates his achievements despite his condition. Curtis might not seem like a natural fit for Doctor Who but this is one of the finest Matt Smith episodes.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Every time I step outside I feel that nature is shouting at me! Come on! Come on! Come on…capture my mystery!’
‘Is this how time normally passes? Really slowly. In the right order.’
‘Will you follow him?’ ‘Of course!’
‘Be good to yourself and be kind to yourself.’
‘That strange wild man who roamed the fields of Provence was not only the worlds greatest artist but also one of the greatest men who ever lived.’
‘I still can’t believe one of the haystacks was in the museum. How embarrassing.’
‘The way I see it every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things but vice versa the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant. And we definitely added to his pile of good things.’
‘The ultimate ginge.’

The Good Stuff: Whilst much of the imagery in this episode is striking, I can think of few openings that top the crows flying from the glowing corn as something invisible approaches the camera for gripping you instantly with visual beauty. Bill Nighy is one of those actors that you always hope will wind his way into Doctor Who one day but never think he will. He’s a joy in this episode simply because he makes such an impact with very few scenes, that’s the skill of a good performer. The cat on the cobblestones as the TARDIS materialises in the alley is one of my favourite TARDIS landings ever. The set designers should be extremely proud of recreating the café exterior with such an eye to detail. Is the accordion music in the bar the Doctor’s theme for the season? Curtis cutely dresses up the first Krafayis as a psychotic episode of Van Gogh’s before the Doctor realises there is a genuine threat present. That's a genius way of adding a monster to the story and show the audience the sort of episodes that Van Gogh is experiencing. Watching these two great men being led a merry dance by this invisible creature is a joy to watch, the show pulling off farce (my least favourite form of comedy) with real style. It's lovely that with all the technology at its disposal Doctor Who of this day and age will still plump for invisible aliens (it's not a budgetary thing because they still have to go to the lengths of creating the beast in CGI and the physical effects probably cost more anyway) and watching it pursue the Doctor through the streets is surprisingly tense (Blair Witch aside, I always love dramatic handheld camera work). Plus Amy turning up around the corner makes the audience laugh and jump which is always a great feeling. I’m not sure what is more striking; the sunlight streaming into Van Gogh’s bedroom or the truly stunning image of Amy surrounded by sunflowers. Both are beautiful images. We are reminded of the tragic events at the end of the last episode in a very delicate moment showing how subtle this seasons arc can be handled if necessary. The Doctor and Amy in the confession box is another exquisitely lit scene. Doctor Who is not the sort of show that discusses the effects of depression and there is a very telling moment where the Doctor tries to and Vincent tells him to shut up – the episode has already shown us in some very powerful scenes that Vincent is unstable and it doesn’t need to push it further (like most shows would) in dissecting his apparent madness. The double twist of discovering that the Krafayis is blind and then its accidental murder completely turns the simple plot of its head and guts the viewer. But it is all done in a very subtle manner that doesn't bash the sentiment over the viewers head as some episodes can. Seeing the world through Vincent’s eyes is sheer visual poetry and it will be a long time before the series offers anything that potent again. Even the touch of the TARDIS covered in posters that have burnt off in the vortex is perfect. It feels like everybody is working really hard to make this episode as visually and emotionally memorable as possible. The ending made me choke with tears when I first watched this. Simon and I were sitting on the sofa with tears streaming down our faces hugging each other with the sheer magic of it. Can you think of a more amazing gift the Doctor could have given Vincent than to realise that his work would eventually be hailed as the work of a genius? It's hugely uplifting and beautiful and Curran’s dizzying reaction is captured to perfection.

Result: Vincent and the Doctor is a truly sophisticated episode of Doctor Who and one of the few moments of television that actually brought tears to me eyes. It's awesome than an episode with such gorgeous character drama and one that studies schizophrenia with such sensitivity still has time for a giant invisible chicken roaming the streets of Paris. Visually it is one of my all time favourite Doctor Who stories, every frame has been exquisitely lit and designed to provide a feast for the eyes and some of the imagery is appropriately as dazzling as a Van Gogh painting itself. Matt Smith and Karen Gillan give their best performances of the fifth series and Richard Curtis treats the pair of them to some wonderful dialogue and interplay.If this is how likeable this pair can be together...why hasn't it quite clicked like this until now? But the star of the show is Tony Curran who takes a potentially unsympathetic role and creates a Vincent Van Gogh who is entirely credible and great fun to be around and before the episode he will have broken your heart. The intimacy and chemistry between these three characters is extraordinary. Some people might not like this slower, more character based drama but I found it intoxicating and with the Angel two parter it is my favourite episode of series five: 10/10

The Lodger written by Gareth Roberts and directed by Catherine Morshead

Whacky Wanderer: Possibly Matt Smith's finest hour in his impressive first season as the Doctor, and certainly his cutest. My own dear mother was extremely resistant to Smith because she was so desperately in love with David Tennant (and who can blame her for that?) but come The Lodger she had finally been worn down by just how adorable this new incarnation of the Doctor is. One part Troughton, one part Tennant (his ruthlessness) and two parts Matt Smith's brilliantly quirky and intelligent self, the eleventh Doctor has well and truly flourished come the end of his first year (although for me personally I thought that was when he muched on fish finger custard).

He is an ancient amateur and an absolute dream! I love how he doesn't have a clue about currency and turns up on Craig's doorstep with three grand in a paper bag telling him not to spend it all on sweeties! His gentle air kissing, continental style, is so sweet you just want to hug him. Don't call him the Rotneister. The quiet way he reacts to Mark coming into money suggests 7th Doctor style setting up events after he is done. He learnt to cook in Paris. He looks a little hurt when he admits people never stop telling him he's wierd. Craig looks the Doctor up and down and assumes that he is gay! His singing in the shower is very reminicent of the 3rd Doctor in Spearhead from Space. Seeing the Doctor in the buff is a real eye opener...he's even more of a skinny rake than I imagined! I love how he walks around totally unselfconsciously in the nude. The gentle bromance between the Doctor and Craig is lovely and there is a lot of subtle touching that makes it feel very convincing. The Doctor is the only person in the unvierse (aside from possibly Graham Norton) who would walk up to a bunch of solid looking footballers and start air kissing them! It is wonderful to see the Doctor enjoying himself so much in something as frivolous as football, Matt Smith was clearly having a ball (haha) and it is quite infectious. Like me he cannot bear wine and spits it back into his glass! I love the delicious visual of forcing Craig to drink from a teapot spout. Having worked in a call centre on the phones for over a year I was cheering when he blew raspberries at Craig's nastiest customer! This Doctor really is like me, he sits and has a conversation with the cat (man sometimes they are the only ones who understand).

Surrogate Companions: Since Amy Pond contributes absolutely nothing to the story until the final scene lets instead focus on Craig and Sophie, the Doctor's one time companions for this story. I loved it when Sophie said 'It's just Craig', that feels so real because I think we all have friends who say that when they are comfortable with us. I also think we have all had a friend who has phoned up and ruined plans with their latest drama! Who has ever had feelings so strong that the thought of telling the person that you love them makes you feel physically sick? The Doctor is the unwanted third person in this romance and I've been that person too! Craig's jealousy of the Doctor feels so real, I think we would all feel that way if somebody crashed into our lives who was funnier, more confident and talented than ourselves. Somebody who impresses all of your mates is never wanted. I am not the hugest fan of Amy Pond solo and frankly I think i would have preferred to have had Craig and Sophie throughout this season, they are far more likable.

Sparkling Dialogue: 'Six billion people. Watching you two at work I'm starting to wonder where they came from.'
'Is that a lie?' 'Of course its a lie!'
'For Godsake kiss the girl!'
'That's a number to beat.'

The Good Stuff: The threat up the stairs is very Psycho-esque in that it is extremely simple but very menacing. The spreading mould and electric flashes through the window causes your mind to reel at what on Earth is going on up there. I love the scrambler that makes you talk total gibberish. The footie scenes are so unrepresentitive of Doctor Who they should be cherished for that fact alone but they are also gloriously uplifting. The wierd contraption the Doctor builds out of bits and bobs is the modern day Time Flow Analogue from The Time Monster! Ouch - the headbutting 'contact' scene is certainly memorable - imagine th Five Doctors if this had been the method of their pooling of knowledge...it would have been bloody! The twist that the building is only one storey comes from no where and the TARDIS set (designed by a Blue Peter winner?) is fabullusly eerie. The simplicity of the two dovetailing plots through a kiss a little tacky but you still go 'awww' all the same. I really like the idea that we don't know who was trying to build a TARDIS but if I know Moffatt we will find out before his time is up. Amy discovering the ring was a great moment and I couldn't wait to watch the next episode (especially when I saw that awesome next time trailer!).

The Bad Stuff: The Lodger is extremely poorly placed in the season - I would have put this much earlier where we needed to get to know the Doctor better. With the Silurian two part, Van Gogh and The Lodger there are too many small scale character tales in a row and the season lacks the dramatic impetus of a Davies' season at its best (compare to season four at this stage - the Library two parter, Midnight, Turn Left...). Who on Earth is that drunken old soak who shuffled past Craig's place? Would anybody in their right mind actually go up the creepiest set of stairs in the history of first floors? Even if a little girl in pigtails was asking for help from the shadows I would pass! Did Amy have to be so badly sidelined in this story? There is some really gooey squelchy kissing in Craig and Sophie's last scene.

Result: Who ever thought Doctor Who could work as a blokey sitcom? The Lodger is basically a three way character drama between the Dcotor, Craig and Sophie but its far cuter and aimiable than you could ever imagine. Its Matt Smith's sweetest performance in his first season and there is a lot of comic potential in the Doctor trying to fit in in suburban Britain. You wouldn't want to see this sort of thing too often but as an amusing one off it is a perfectly charming production, filmed with a delicate touch and featuring two warming performances from James Corden and Daisy Haggard. Is this the only Doctor Who episode to be inspired by a DWM comic strip? If so lets let Gareth Roberts plunder his own work more often, this is as feelgood as a night night of pizza/booze/telly with good friends: 8/10

The Pandorica Opens written by Steven Moffat and directed by Toby Haynes

This story in a nutshell: All the world's a story... 

Nutty Professor: Still adorable at this point, Matt Smith is riding high on the success of his debut year. The awkward, geeky, desperately cute eleventh Doctor of season five is still my favourite version of his character (at Smith's too) before the rot began to set in (season six is responsible for a lot of problems in this era). Whilst the gentle pace of Vincent and the Doctor and The Lodger afforded the eleventh Doctor the chance to enjoy some of his warmest character moments it is nice to ramp up the pace a little and see him trapped in an impossibly dramatic situation. Much of season five is quite quiet in terms of huge threats for the Doctor to face (the run from Vampires of Venice to The Lodger sees the Doctor squaring up to fish people, himself, Silurians, an alien chicken and a spaceship interface) and this is the chance to see how he copes under the pressure of the sort of danger that his predecessor dealt with week in, week out. Pretty damn well, as it happens. The much celebrated speech he makes atop Stonehenge to the collective menagerie of monsters that have shown up is a scene that celebrates how confident this character can be in the face of impossible odds. He does it all with a smile on his face and a song in his heart. He doesn't have any weapons, just a great deal of front. His 'look at me I'm a target!' and two thumbs up to Amy when they dash into danger are just gorgeous, the sort of simple character humour that the show forgot how to pull off in Smith's final year. There will be moments in subsequent seasons where Matt Smith will wow me despite the some of the material he is given but there is no moment where I was quite as thrilled by his performance as the final scene where he is locked in the Pandorica. The Doctor is completely at the mercy of his enemies, begging for them to listen to him as the universe falls apart. Matt Smith really goes for it, vulnerable and desperate, and I was quite literally on the edge of my seat.

Scots Tart: 'She's Amy and she's surrounded by Romans, I'm not sure history can take it...' Amy walks from the TARDIS drunk on her own confidence, tipping  wink to the Roman Army and impossibly smug in her certainty. My teeth grind at how appallingly self satisfied she is at this point. The mistreatment of the character in season six couldn't come quick enough. The Doctor points out that Amy's life doesn't make sense and the whole story is built around the mystery of how vacuous her back story is. Beyond Rory, we still don't know a great deal about the character (beyond the fact that she is stroppy and horny a lot of the time) but Moffat is acknowledging that that has been done for a reason. I still don't think it is the best approach to introduce part of a character with so many gaps - it makes it very hard to warm to them when you can't see what their motivation is or why they behave the way they do - but at least the repair work has begun. Come her final half season Moffat will have assembled a full character, it's just a shame that for much of her run she should be so lacking. Just before she is shot to death, Amy starts to behave like a human being. Go figure.

Loyal Roman: It's the first instance of the resurrection of Rory so the idea is still innovative at this point. You can't help but cheer at the re-appearance of the character and how Moffat plays it up to comedic effect, the Doctor completely failing to notice the impossibility of him being here. I'm glad they didn't go with the Doctor's 'it just happened, let's just except it' explanation (I think Moffat is preparing us for the magic tricks that he will pull off without explanation in the second episode) and there is a solid reason for him showing up by the end of the episode. The scenes that plays out between Amy and Rory at the climax are the first time I felt the tragedy of their relationship really clicked into place.

Sparkling Dialogue: 'Everything that ever hated you is coming here tonight.'

'Remember every black day I ever stopped you and then do the smart thing, let somebody else try first.'

'No, we will save the universe from you!'

The Good:

* The pre-titles sequence is startlingly ambitious insofar as it walks through a myriad of the stories earlier in the season and re-acquaintens us with many of the characters that we met along the way. It's a culmination of Matt Smith's debut year, bringing together all the elements in such a way that makes them all feel connected. Either these vignettes were filmed during their episodes or plenty of the actors agreed to come back for small cameos but it was a delight catch up with Van Gogh, Churchill and Bracewell, the 'bloodah Queen' and River Song and see how they are linked to the Pandorica. At this point Steven Moffat is riding high on the success of his first year and revelling in all the elements that made it work. It feels as though a whole seasons budget might have been swallowed up in five minutes too, such is the expense that makes it on screen as we cut from one setting and one time to another. Bravo, it's the most grand and confident set piece in his entire run to date, all leading up to that potent image of the TARDIS exploding in the vortex as painted by Van Gogh.

* It's worth remembering that at his height Steven Moffat is capable of writing some very funny material and The Pandorica Opens is packed full of some of his funniest jokes; the stick person drawing left on the wall of River's cell, the insinuation that Jack's wrist has been cut off for his vortex manipulator (which would tie into the idea that he is the Face of Boe), the Doctor poking at Rory who cannot exist.

* The Pandorica is certainly given appropriate build up, billed as the ultimate prison for the most feared creature in the universe. I love how the story tries to trick us into thinking that there is something inside that wants to get out when in reality it is an empty casket waiting to be filled. I don't think anybody could have predicted quite where this story was going. It always feels like the story is building to something impressive with the clicking of the Pandorica's gears as it gets itself ready to open and unleash...what?

* Cinematic influences abound with stirring footage on horseback that reminded me of fantasy films such as Lord of the Rings and a secret entrance beneath Stonehenge that apes Indiana Jones. The soundtrack certainly thinks it is accompanying something more majestic than a small screen production and the astonishingly vast sets below ground concur. When we catch a glimpse of the Pandorica in the half light, draped in cobwebs and adorned with symbols it is a masterpiece of design.

* It's almost a shame that Moffat pulls every trick out of the hat for his first finale because he has nowhere to go in subsequent end of season spectaculars. Russell T. Davies got to a point where he pulled together all of the Doctor's friends across three series (Doctor Who, Torchwood and the Sarah Jane Adventures) to take on the might of the Dalek Empire. The Pandorica Opens brings together all of the Doctor's enemies to joining forces against him. How can you possibly top that for sheer excitement? Subsequent season finales would go to the lengths of marrying the Doctor off, introducing a new Doctor and turning the Master into a woman for their kicks but nothing touches the sheer dramatic strength of a union between the most evil races in the universe. Daleks, Cybermen, Sontarans, Tereleptils, Slitheen, Chelonians, Nestenes, Drahvins, Sycorax, Zygons, Draconians, etc. What could possibly be in the Pandorica that all these races want? How spectacular is the light show in the sky that represents all of these races screaming in and out of the atmosphere of the Earth, all waiting for the right moment to pick off the Doctor. Smartly the story makes us think that the Doctor has managed to convince the collection of nasties to bugger off when they are just waiting for the moment to spring their trap. The cracks in the skin of the universe are given some consideration. All of reality being threatened is enough for the Doctor's enemies to pool their resources and work together to defeat him because they recognise that it is his Ship that causes the calamity.

* To my mind this is still the best use of the Cybermen in NuWho. It works because the Cybermen are not the central threat of the story so not a great deal is expected of them and thus Moffat is able to surprise with some gloriously inventive and macarcbre moments as parts of a Cyberman come to life and attack the Doctor and Amy. The standout moment of horror comes when Amy is lashed at by the tendrils of a Cyber-head and when she grapples with the mask it pops open and a screaming human skull is revealed inside. I have always asked for the body horror of these creatures to be exploited and Moffat fulfils some of that desire in these visually delicious scenes. On first transmission I was screaming with delight. The head scuttling away to find its body and being plonked on top to make a complete soldier might be my favourite moment of the entire year.

The Bad:

* Whilst there are many, many things to praise in The Pandorica Opens, it is also the point where Moffat realises that he can do anything with the show and get away with it, almost to the point of smugness. The first recorded words in the universe being HELLO SWEETIE scrawled on a cliff face is the sort of self-satisfied nonsense that would pollute the next two seasons. 'I hate good wizards in fairytales, they always turn out to be him.'

Result: A huge round of applause for the final ten minutes of The Pandorica Opens, which builds to an incredible climax that has never been topped by Moffat since. The eerie mystery of River exploring Amy's house when she was a little girl, the goosebumps down the spine moment you realise that the entire story has been constructed out of a storybook in Amy's bedroom, the aching tragedy of Rory being revealed as an Auton and shooting the woman he loves, the drama of River trapped in the exploding TARDIS and the potent appearance of all those monsters who conspire to shove the most dangerous creature in the universe in the Pandorica: the Doctor. It's an astonishing vivid series of events and it never fails to thrill me. Moffat takes the epic climax of the penultimate episode to it's furthest extreme by destroying the entire universe, stars exploding as we pull away from the Earth. Never mind how the series deals with taking the story to such a compelling climax, just bask in the glory of a series that has so much gall. What impressed me the most was how gently so much of this is played; the scenes between Rory and Amy re-discovering themselves are underplayed and all the more affecting for it, the Doctor being imprisoned is filmed in slow motion with quietly sad music and the pull away to the imploding universe is a disquietingly undramatic and poetic image. This could have been overblown and pompous but instead it makes an impact by being subtle, despite how everything has gone to shit. Everything that leads up to that climax is pretty gorgeous too; the dynamic and frightening use of the Cybermen, the budget busting and ambitious pre-credits sequence, the enormity of the sets and the musical score. The only problem I have with The Pandorica Opens comes in the form of Amy, who irritates the hell out of me in season five but even she is shot dead come the climax so a massive thumbs up there too. Moffat might never be able to build up to this kind of a climax again but we can rest assured that for one year he pulled all the threads of the season together in a way that, if not besting Davies' bizarre ability to take the show to a breathtaking precipice, matched his predecessor. The antithesis of The Stolen Earth; subtle and haunting rather than bombastic and high octane and bringing together all of the Doctor's enemies rather than his friends, The Pandorica Opens is a quietly masterful and powerful episode: 10/10


The Big Bang written by Steven Moffatt and directed by Toby Haynes

TO BE REVIEWED...

Specials

Dr Who and the Daleks written by Terry Nation and directed by Gordon Flemming

TO BE REVIEWED...


Daleks Invasion Earth 2150AD written by Terry Nation and directed by Gordon Fleming

TO BE REVIEWED...


K.9 and Company: A Girls Best Friend written by Terrance Dudley and directed by John Black

This story in a nutshell: Sarah Jane is going solo…and she has a metal dog for company!

Investigate Journalist: Elisabeth Sladen is one of my favourite actresses because she has the awesome ability to turn shit into gold – she turned what could have been dreadfully pious and militant feminist character into a warm, witty and wonderful human being to travel with the Doctor. If she had any doubts as to whether she could hold up her own series they were completely unfounded because she once again takes a hold of something pretty unremarkable and wrings some golden moments out of it. Its nowhere near the vehicle Invasion of the Bane was for her character (I loved how that story built her up as an enigma across the road to be cracked) but it is a valuable stepping stone between The Hand of Fear and The Five Doctors which then seams into School Reunion. Sarah has been abroad (hopefully chasing stories) and has come to her Aunt’s to write a book. Interestingly considering she ends up running something a teenage crèche in later years she tells Brendan that she doesn’t want to be surrogate mum. However she falls into the role with effortless ease and has a very appealing maternal side to her. When she realises K.9 is a gift from the Doctor she sweetly realises that he hadn’t forgotten about her. Sarah is told to knock a drink back or two and it might make her a little less prickly! Its always nice to catch Sarah behind a typewriter at work and in this fire lit location it works a treat. She always was a townie and gets to rail against the eccentricity and relaxed attitude of the country folk in the police station. I think I just wanted to spend more time in Sarah’s company than anything and when she is laughing away at the end of the story I wanted to know what happened to her next.

Posh Twat: I rather like Brendan even when he acts like a bit of a twat (that awful laugh) and he is brought to life by a reasonably good actor in Ian Sears. It’s interesting to compare him to the other male assistant at the time (Adric) and he winds up looking even more impressive. Frankly Seers would have been far more likable in Waterhouse’s role but I guess it was a case of finding him too late.

The Good: To be fair to John Black’s (whose direction is laid back at the best of times) his handling of the nighttime coven scenes is surprisingly atmospheric. The robed figures chanting around a fire and those horrible goat masks conjure a ambiance of dark magic and it all looks sumptuous captured on film. One of the reasons I am glad this story was made is to get a chance to see Aunt Lavinia, Sarah’s surrogate parent and the career driven scientist brainchild of the family. Mary Wimbush lights up ciggies like there is no tomorrow and doesn’t disappoint – Lavinia clearly loves the scandal her work erupts and won’t be deterred by gossips and doom mongers. Despite a very different tone it’s surprising how many elements of this adventure feel familiar to Lis Sladen’s later spin off, The Sarah Jane Adventures. Had this gone to a series it would have featured Sarah Jane, a boy genius and K.9 and would have been primarily set a grand old house. I really like the sets for Lavinia’s house, they feel huge and they are packed full of curios, painting and lovely old-fashioned furniture. There is a domestic feel to this series that was completely missing from Doctor Who at the time and was very welcome. Mind you perhaps a little too welcome because Sarah seems to spend the first half of the story flitting from one living room to the next!

The Bad: I would say that the story had pacing issues if it ever approached anything called pace and whilst the early scenes are cute enough the story plods from one introduction to another with very little momentum. It feels as if we are moving to Morton Harwood rather than getting involved in a story. Why does Linda Polan play Juno as though she is always conniving something? Her phone call to Sarah suggests an evil plan being hatched when really she is just being neighbourly! Where has Sarah moved to, Royston Vasey? The incidental music is all wrong because it has the tacky, outer space feel of season eighteen as created by the radiophonic workshop whereas it needed a sinister, orchestral feel. How funny is the sequence where K.9 pursues that fella out of the house and past the greenhouses? He is so slow the actor has to keep stopping to get his breath back to allow the poor automaton a chance to catch up with him! I wonder if Simon Pegg hadn’t seen K.9 and Company before embarking on Hot Fuzz because there is a familiar feeling that every bugger in this village is up to satanic ritualism! In the film it is played for laughs whereas here it is treated with deadly seriousness and in some ways that is even funnier. Sarah leaps to the rather odd conclusion that somebody is trying to kill her when a tractor leaps out of a field onto the road she is driving on although it is clearly visible for about half a mile and she could have easily have slowed down! This is either poor direction on John Black’s part or an overreaction on Sarah’s. I tend to believe it was the former. The conclusion is really frustrating because it actually builds quite nicely with what feels like a genuine threat to Brendan’s life and some nice music but then K.9 dashes off to the rescue and the whole thing goes down the pan with actors holding up knives and waiting for his stun ray to hit them to fall over! It goes from atmospheric kiddie horror to science fiction farce in a few seconds! Commander Pollock, the man who has been dogging Sarah’s footsteps throughout the story, turns out to be the head villain! We’ve now blundered into Columbo territory! Predictable doesn’t cover it.

The Title Sequence: I was going to stick this in the bad section but then I suddenly remembered how much joy it has given me over the years and I had to give it a section of its own. Nothing could have prepared me for the experience of watching the title sequence when I bought my VHS copy. As far as I recall my coffee went for a burton and I was left in agonising fits of laughter on the living room rug! What on Earth were they thinking? Without a doubt the most 1980s sequence ever committed to film – if you want to see where everything went wrong in that era just stick these titles on. The fashion, the cars, the hair, the awful gadgets, the way everybody tried to look hip, the editing, the horrendous zooms…and the godawful music. Poor Lis Sladen is made to look as though she is blissed out on wine wandering around the country in her metro, occasionally getting out to jog along the country roads and pull down a paper and stare into the camera as though she really is sizzled. It’s agonisingly awful and very, very funny. I always stick it on when I am in a bad mood (its got its own little clip on YouTube) but as a title sequence to introduce a gritty new series about an investigative journalist it fails on every level. What on Earth was K.9 doing on that wall?

The Shallow Bit: Poor Brendan is put in a white dress to be sacrificed. I guess the idea was to make him look virginal but he just looks like a geek in a petticoat.

Result: There is a shot of Sarah, Brendan and K.9 discussing the disappearance of Aunt Lavinia when I caught a glimpse of the potential of this series and could see with some tighter storytelling that it could work. Of course they went on to prove that many years later with The Sarah Jane Adventures but for scant moments you can see what an engaging series this could have been too. There is an engaging Enid Blyton-esque atmosphere to some of the material that should have been capitalised on far more than it is. Kudos to the designer (the sets are lovely) and the principal actors who help to keep the story afloat but the two key areas, writing and direction, are what let this story down. The dialogue is pretty leaden (I can’t think of a single line that stands out) and the story moves at a glacial pace and John Black doesn’t help by shooting it in the most pedestrian way possible (the camera is usually fixed to the spot and there is no attempt at high or low angles, shooting through the sets, etc). The best thing on offer is Lis Sladen who is as marvellous as ever and lights up the story whenever she appears. Ultimately I can see why this wasn’t picked up as an entire season in this vain would have been too much but Sarah working without the Doctor and looking into supernatural happenings is a tempting possibility that has now reared its head and without it Russell T Davies may never have followed up on its promise: 5/10




Doctor Who The Movie written by Matthew Jacobs and directed by Geoffrey Sax

TO BE REIVEWED...

Planet of the Dead written by Gareth Roberts & Russell T Davies and directed by James Strong

This story in a nutshell: A bus in a desert…

Mockney Dude: The trouble with the tenth Doctor at this point is that Russell T Davies is struggling to find new things to do with the character and so he backtracks and uses reliable characteristics that feel bland through overuse. So all this rubbish about being at the real Easter, the little dish on his device and his assuring speeches feel desperately tired because we have seen it all before. In the very next story Davies would prove that this incarnation has some surprises still locked away inside of him but this is an unfortunate trip down memory lane before we get there. Sonicking his glasses into sunnies should be a very cool moment but it just made me groan. The Doctor speaks every language, even insectoid, which means we have two unbearably conceited protagonists in this story. It would have been much more interesting had communication been a struggle. Scenes between the Doctor and Christina talking flirtatiously about their thieving lifestyles fails to muster any interest…if the spark aint there its just two people nattering in a very boring fashion. Why does the Doctor kiss every person that offers their lips these days? At least Matt Smith reserves himself for one woman but the tenth Doctor is like the ultimate tramp. Just when you think the Doctor might still have some balls by turning down her request to travel with him he helps her to escape police custody. How crushingly predictable. Remember when this Doctor could bring down the Prime Minister with five words, I miss that guy.

Lady Christina: A huge problem at the heart of this story is that David Tennant and Michelle Ryan fail to connect in the same way he did with Billie Piper, Freema Agyeman and Catherine Tate and what should have been flirtatious moments look awkward (go and watch Matt Smith and Alex Kingston to see how this sort of thing should be done). A second problem is that Christina doesn’t feel like a remotely believable person, she sounds like a management training textbook half the time and her plumy upper class tones make you want to kick her about a bit every time she smugly trumps the Doctor. Christina is right, they don’t make any sort of couple thank you very much. ‘What the blazes was that?’ – Ryan should stick to being a cockney in Eastenders…she’s far more convincing at it.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘He will knock four times.’

The Good Stuff: Who would ever have thought Doctor Who could conjure up images as cinematic as the crumpled bus lost in a desert of crisp, glowing sand dunes? The blistering vistas of Dubai are visually stunning. Lee Evan’s Malcolm is the Sergeant Osgood of the noughties and pretty much the best thing about this story but he is only a peripheral comic plot device so that isn’t really saying much. To be fair to the director his whopping great first zoom in on the Tritovore is gloriously tacky and made me whoop with laughter. Mugambe pointing a gun at Malcolm was the one moment my interest really perked up. The funniest scene comes when Lee Evans falls off a chair.

The Bad Stuff: The opening scenes are the most expensive art theft scenes outside of a big screen movie you are likely to see and whilst they are easy on the eye it is pretty hollow opening to a story. It is all a bit too stylised and self aware for its own good (‘happy Easter’). By this stage I was truly bored of seeing red London buses and long shots of City. It felt like the show never went anywhere else. Despite attempts you can’t really have a dynamic action sequence featuring a bus. Keith Parry really got the short straw by biting the dust within 15 minutes and not getting any characterisation beyond being called ‘bus driver.’ Paul Cornell has a lot to answer for when he introduced this touchy feely lets get to share each other feelings bollocks which turns up in the new series every now again. This is a particularly vacuous bunch and their tales of staying in a watching telly and chops and gravy being special is blatant audience manipulation of the worst kind. Even a faceless bunch of UNIT soldiers turning up doesn’t feel special anymore after their host of appearances in Doctor Who, Sarah Jane and Torchwood. The Doctor has connected mobiles phones across space and time ad nauseum. We’ve had soothsayers spitting out future plot developments before (Fires of Pompeii) and it was a lot more interesting then. Swarms of creatures (the Reapers, the Vashta Nerada) are old hat. Insect monsters that are less than convincing…it’s The Web Planet innit? Rather than give the idea of the planet of the dead any emotional worth the script would rather make cheap shots about dead people in Christina’s hair. The swarm looks very similar to the monsters in the Longoliers and have about as much interest – they are just a bunch of hungry creatures and with no voice or personality once again the episode misses a trick in getting the audience involved. The story wastes time showing Christina performing death defying stunts which aren’t very impressive. Argh – they even repeat the ‘I had this friend once and that’s what they used to call me’ scene! Get some new material! Was I the only person who wanted to slap the woman who kept blubbing (so unmemorable I cannot even remember her name!). Why is it when they superimpose objects over the London skyline it looks so unconvincing. They had the same trouble in Doomsday with the floating Daleks and the bus looks similarly daft here. More clapping, cheering and saluting of the Doctor – makes me want to vomit.

Result: Planet of the Dead is a whole bunch of tatty New Series clichés wrapped up in a very pretty package. It the dullest approach to telling a story in years by revealing the twist of the tale in the title and then following that up after half and hour with a bucket load of exposition. We have no reason to connect with what has happened on this planet, no personal stakes and as a result genocide feels like an event to shrug your shoulders at. The tenth Doctor feels remarkably tired in this story, happy to trade off his old clichéd characteristics and obvious humour and Michelle Ryan doesn’t register in the slightest. You have a threat devoid of personality and a story that always goes for exhibitionism over emotional involvement and no sense of danger. Even the musical cues are old hat. There are a few moments of gift wrapped spectacle and the odd laugh with Lee Evans but ultimately the one and only Easter special fails to live up to that name – more than ever before in Doctor Who’s history does a change of administration feel necessary. This is the ultimate popcorn telly; light, forgettable and even whilst you are consuming it you would hard pressed to figure out why: 3/10



The Waters of Mars written by Russell T Davies and Phil Ford & directed by Graeme Harper

Mockney Dude: Of the four specials that were created to see the tenth Doctor off I find The Waters of Mars has the most provocative and engrossing characterisation, beating even his swansong. Tennant was asked to give a lot throughout his tenure but I think this might just be his best performance in his run, inching out his previous bests of Human Nature, Forest of the Dead and Midnight. What I really love is the contrasts, he plays the first half of the episode quietly and sensitively and then goes for the kill and unleashes bloody vengeance on Time (oh yes it deserves that capital here). This is the sort of story that could only be attempted when the incumbent Doctor is knowingly departing (and both the viewers and the character know this) but I still think portraying the Doctor as a hysterical, wild-eyed egomaniac full of his own self importance and willing to take on anybody that stands in the way of how he sees things is remarkably brave. It would appear that Donna was right and companionless he is more reckless than ever. This is great story to reveal the Doctor’s insatiable thirst for knowledge as every fibre of his body is telling him to leave but as things get more dangerous he just has to know what the truth is about Bowie Base I. His compassion towards Gadget pays dividends since the robot manages to save the day ultimately. His relationship with Adelaide is gorgeous throughout, initially distrustful, then respectful and then the Doctor twists a knife her gut by telling her it is her fate to die and she begs him to them. If Catherine Tate hadn’t made such an impression in my heart I would say that Adelaide was the best companion the tenth Doctor had. Only appearing in this story that is quite a statement. During the unforgettable climax the Doctor declares his Godhood and that he is taking over from where the Time Lords left off and his hubris is instantly trampled on by Adelaide who demands to know who the hell he is to decide who is ‘little people.’ When she backs away from, genuinely terrified by what he has become the audience realise that the Doctor has crossed a line. He declares himself terrifyingly unstoppable and as Adelaide tells him like a slap round the face, that’s wrong.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Earth is so much water. It has so much beauty. We should like that world.’
‘Water is patient. Water waits.’
‘Damn you…’

The Good Stuff: The messages that the crew of Bowie Base I receive from their loved ones is simple, powerful economic characterisation (sums up Russell’s greatest strength as a writer, I feel). Has Mars ever looked more gorgeous than it does here, blood red skyline, glowing sands (and the TARDIS looks incongruously resplendent). I really enjoyed the subtle interplay between Ed and Adelaide, as well as the shocking character development on display there are lots of quieter moments as well that really sell the idea that this is a unit with history. Gadget is as cute as a button and perfect fodder for the kids. The direction is fantastic throughout but certain moments such as the first transformation, blurred in the background to heighten the tension, are inspired. Knowing that these characters are all due to die ramps up the tension at a very early stage. The exterior of Bowie Base is dazzlingly authentic and I love how the ‘camera’ swoops across it so dynamically, cleverly putting us in each location. There is some nice world building with the mention of the dangerous climate and an oil apocalypse. We have a stereotypically creepy Doctor Who location in the hydroponics area and yet it’s visually stunning (the birds are a lovely touch). Yuri’s brothers story about the car not only manages to be a very sweet gay reference (some of them are quite laboured throughout RTD’s era although I do appreciate their inclusion all the same) but also distracts us from Maggie convulsing in the background. Ewww…those mouths blackened by fission and grotesque cracked lips, the vomiting water and pupils like daggers, this is one example of make up scaring the shit out of me! The skin crawling glug glug glug music courtesy of Murray Gold. Abusing Gadget for a ride (plus Roman’s electrifying epilepsy) is way cool. How nice is to finally have a decent reason for an alien force to want to travel to Earth…for the water. Maggie, mutilated, bleached red and screaming her alien scream is enough to give you nightmares. Its nice to the see the fixed moments in Time notion brought to the fore (ala Fires of Pompeii) to bite the Doctor in the butt again. There is a flashback to The Stolen Earth that offers a new perspective on an old story (like Love and Monsters) but it features some stunning characterisation (‘It simply went away. I knew that night I would follow it’) and sensual music. The airlock scenes between the Doctor and Adelaide are remarkably intense, usually Davies equates drama with scale but here he this is an emphatically quiet moment between two astounding actors and their penetrating reactions to the dialogue. To be told that your death would have such consequences is an awful burden to live up to and typically of this story’s no easy options approach. I always get goosebumps when the water finally breaks through, every single time I watch this story – I am so absorbed by this point I find these moments genuinely terrifying. Stephie watching her family on the screen as she is killed hits a level of psychological terror this show usually avoids (and probably with good reason). Wow, the fireworks when the rocket explodes are budget breakingly dazzling. Gadget soars across wine coloured Mars to the TARDIS – I could just bottle that moment as why I love Doctor Who so much. Those the most intense 10 minutes of Doctor Who you are ever likely to watch and they are incredibly assembled by Graeme Harper, ending on an almighty explosion. Adelaide’s suicide is intimately played; it’s a genuinely chilling twist both in its action and its implication that that Doctor has gone too far. The Cloister Bell tolls the Doctor’s death.

The Bad Stuff: The cuts to the screen with the information about the fate of the Bowie Base crew is a lovely idea and well executed but the point is laboured by far too many cuts after each character is introduced. There’s a lot of macho running in this story! The hysterical performances of Tennant and Duncan as they discover Andy looks like an uncomfortable moment of improvisation.

The Shallow Bit: Yuri is desperately cute. I can’t say that I fancy him but I would sit him on my bed and cuddle him before I go to bed.

Result: The Waters of Mars is the only Doctor Who story that gives me goosebumps every time I watch it. There is a dynamic pace that is maintained throughout and the tension intensifies with every single second. Viscerally and emotionally it is one of the most unnerving and discomforting Doctor Who stories and it also features the most powerful characterisation in NuWho, economically painted in some very deep strokes. It’s a superb cast that totally convince as a unit working together under siege. Lindsey Duncan deserves much praise for her turn as Adelaide, one of the most impressive guest appearances in Doctor’s near half decade. Adelaide is likable, intense, utterly believable and riveting foil for the Doctor. The story keeps pushing at the end until you are gagging for air and it says some frightening things about the tenth Doctor who has started believing his own reputation. If this does turn out to be Graeme Harper’s swansong it demonstrates why he was the best director to work on Doctor Who: 10/10

The End of Time written by Russell T Davies and directed by Euros Lyn

This story in a nutshell: Bye Bye, David…

Mockney Dude: A tour de force performance from David Tennant in his final story bringing an intensity to the role that has rarely been touched on before. Clearly the Doctor desperately needs a companion since he walks out of the TARDIS and babbles on for what feels like the length of a bible with no one to tell him to shut up. His hair is modern according in Wilf, you know all sticky uppy! The Doctor and the Master can sense each other, its almost as if they are sniffing each other out like dogs! He manages to drive both old men and old women mad with lust! In a very intimate confession he admits to Wilf that he is going to die soon and even if he changes it feels like dying and a new man goes sauntering away. Whilst the novels have explored regeneration in some depth (Kate Orman’s The Room with No Doors is a great example) this the first time we have heard the Doctor’s thoughts on the process and the psychological implications (unless you count The Twin Dilemma) and it’s fascinating. He looks out of the window and sees Donna and is quietly devastated to be so close and yet so far from his best friend. In acknowledgement to The Waters of Mars he thought he would be better travelling on his own (given the heartbreak over Rose, Martha and Donna you can see how he might have come to this conclusion) but he did some things, it went wrong. The scenes between the Doctor and the Master in his wasteland hell suggest an intimate friendship as well as being bitter enemies. I have never been keen on their relationship but it is portrayed in a very intense, fascinating way. He just loves playing with Earth girls. He tells the Master he could be beautiful and he doesn’t need to conquer the universe, just see it. The Doctor doesn’t know what he would be without the Master and he would be proud if Wilf was his dad. Admits he is not an innocent, that he has taken lives but he got clever and manipulated people into taking their own lives (nice follow up from Davros’ examination of him in Journey’s End). Sometimes he thinks a Time Lord lives too long. Refuses to take the Wilf’s gun. The Doctor chose to remember the Time Lords of old but they went to war and it changed them. Has he ever looked so cut up and bloody, it really looks as if he is on the way out? He’s wild eyed, spitting, bloody and gun toting – an unforgettable image as he confronts the Master and Rassilon. ‘You never would you coward’ says the Master when he points a gun at him. Just when you think things cannot get any more intense we realise how the Doctor is destined to die and he rails against the unfairness of the universe that has determined his time is up. Tennant is better than ever in his final scenes, like a spectre of death. When he is on the bridge staring down at Mickey and Martha he looks just like the Watcher. As if today wasn’t bad enough…Sylvia is smiling at him! How wonderful that sacrificing his life is rewarded by him surviving long enough to visit all of his old companions (we only see the Davies companions here but we learn in The Death of the Doctor that he visited them all, except Adric presumably). The Doctor is alone, stumbling towards the TARDIS with the universe singing him to his death and his last words are ‘I don’t want to go’ before one of the most explosive regenerations ever. Some of the finest characterisation of the Doctor in any medium sees the tenth Doctor depart the series.

Old Codger: Does anybody not like Bernard Cribbins as Wilf? Is it possible? How can you fail to adore such a cheerful, sentimental, loving old codger? How long have I been waiting for the Doctor to have an older companion (aside from the fabulous Evelyn Smythe in the audios)? All my wishes came to true when Tennant and the Great Cribbo were creeping outside the Naismith Mansion in a very old-school Doctor Who fashion! Wilf has never been one for churches, they are too cold. His little dance against the bus is fabulous and I love the idea that he has a secret network of old cronies to call on. Wilf runs away from Sylvia saying ‘you’re not leaving me with her!’ He would be proud to be the Doctor’s Dad. Wilf’s reaction to being space reminds you of the wonder of travelling with the Doctor in a very understated, beautiful way. He has always dreamt of a view of the Earth from space. Bernard Cribbins makes the character background dump of his time in Palestine at the end of the Mandate in 1948 so poignant and his admission that he may never visit his wife’s grave broke my heart. Private Mott surrounded by a blizzard of bullets, the whole world gone mad. Not an original observation but Wilf larking about in the laser is beyond pleasurable – I whooped with joy throughout! When he thinks the Doctor is on a suicide run he refuses to stop him. Watch as Wilf leaps into the booth to save a strangers life without a second thought, what a guy! He was always here, waiting for the Doctor’s life to end. The last shot we see is of Wilf bleeding with tears knowing the Doctor is heading off to die. He might be one of the shortest ‘companions’ on record but he is also one of the most wonderful.

Tempestuous Temp: I went into this story in two minds. I was desperate for Donna to get her memories back and remember her life with the Doctor and yet I always get so annoyed that Davies continually turns his back on his devastating companion endings (bringing Rose back, bringing Martha back…). Cleverly he gets to have his cake and eat it by bringing her back, reminding us of how terrific she was, have her remember everything in a very tense moment and then give her a happy ending without turning his back on that upsetting twist. Smart sod. Donna is getting married again, this time to dreamer Shaun Temple. Sometimes there is a look on her face which is so sad and she can’t remember why. Donna is subconsciously still helping the Doctor out without even realising. Her final scenes are deliriously happy and the Doctor helping Donna to become a ‘triple rollover’ millionaire is the next best thing to her not getting her memories back.

Sparkling Dialogue: ‘There is only the Master Race!’ Love that line!
‘The human disgrace!’

The Good Stuff: Dalton’s voice over gives this story a real sense of importance, of gravity. Car locking the TARDIS just works. It looks as though millions has been spent on this story, the Ood Sphere looks dazzling and the Elder Ood is an awesome prosthetic. ‘The End of Time itself’ – well you can’t say they didn’t go for something truly apocalyptic for Tennant’s last story. John Simm is utterly chilling as the gluttonous, rabid, feral Master, he is completely psychotic and his ‘DINNER TIME!’ scares the crap out of me! I don’t think the Master has ever been as scary as this. The skeletal Master effect, glowing blue with an electric scream really chills the blood. Is the Master mad or has that noise in his head driven him to insanity. The Noble family scenes are marvellous; they are the best (and by far the most convincing) family Davies brought to Doctor Who. Conker heads Vinvocchi are a welcome touch of madness in an unusually dark story. Ripping apart the chicken is really disturbing, could the Master get any scarier? The idea of the hospital that cures an entire planet is another very nice conceit. I like how Davies drops in the glass doors early on so people can’t say at the end of the story ‘where did that come from?’ Some people really had a problem with the Master clones all over the world, didn’t they? Like this is the oddest thing we have seen in Doctor Who! I love it, its pure craziness but so convincingly and excitingly done I couldn’t help but get wrapped up in it! Gallifrey has never look so splendid, it’s an awesome image of destruction (and the crashed Daleks ships just made my day!). Russell T Davies has finally got his way and dressed the Master in drag. Is that the Seeker from The Ribos Operation? ‘I will not die!’ – Timothy Dalton brings real gravitas to the role of Rassilon. Gallifrey’s salvation is the Earth, how the mighty have fallen. I was screaming with twisted excitement when Donna was pursued on the streets by the multiple Masters. The Master’s madness, the heartbeat of a Time Lord, sent back in time when he was eight years old to torment him all of his life to save Gallifrey in his final days. What a poor sod, Davies turns the Master into Doctor Who’s ultimate tragic character, a victim his whole life. The direction of the Vinvocchi ship is exceptional, smoky, oily pipes and the creaking hull, it is very evocative. The dogfight is the most dizzyingly spectacular action set piece in any Doctor Who story, Wilf having the time of his life firing the lasers, the ship tearing through the atmosphere, screaming across the ocean and ducking and avoiding the missiles! Breathlessly dynamic and huge fun. I would love to see the Skaro Degradation. The Time Lords wanted to become beings of consciousness (echoes of Lawrence Miles there) and leave the universe to go to hell is some pretty meaty development. Its great to see the Master off as a flawed hero, kicking the crap out of Rassilon. The dreadful realisation that Wilf is responsible for the four knocks (and the way the music just dies…) is probably my favourite ever Doctor Who twist. The music throughout is great but the last ten minutes are amongst Murray Gold’s finest ever work. It is indulgent but I think Davies was perfectly was within his right to celebrate everything he has brought to the show and lets face it these are some wonderful scenes. The look Sarah gives him always gives me goosebumps, the Cantina scene look great (and what bad thoughts I had about Jack and Alonzo!), Jessica Hynes makes a superb re-appearance (and if any story was worth celebrating along with the characters it is Human Nature) and it is delightful to see Donna get a happy ending. Geoffrey Noble giving the Doctor the pound to help his daughter after his death turns out to be the most wrenching moment, Davies’ character drama at its finest. Rose and Jackie pre-2005’s first series is the perfect finishing touch. That is one truly explosive, dramatic regeneration – the music is gobsmackingly good.

The Bad Stuff: I still have no idea what the TARDIS in the stained glass is all about except to pad out the story. Who the hell are those Master wannabes? I still have absolutely no idea how the Master was brought back, some biometric whatnot or something? They may have well have just said abracadabra and then he was there! I found Lucy Saxon’s plan within a plan to kill Saxon really pointless, once again padding out the story. President Obama has promised to end the recession – he didn’t do a very good job of it, did he? What a lame Obama double! What’s with the Master leaping about all willy-nilly? The mention of the Weeping Angels is pointless continuity. Rassilon waving his magic glove and turning the human race back is just so easy! The ending with Gallifrey’s blink and you’ll miss it is not only a bit samey from what has come before but its no where near as exciting as the character work going on around it. Martha and Mickey?

The Shallow Bit: I kind think the Master is a little sexy with his blond hair and stubble. Just not when he’s devouring a chicken.

Result: A spectacular conclusion for the tenth Doctor, albeit overlong and padded in the first half. It’s a dazzlingly gorgeous production with the best effects, direction and music we have ever seen, there is no area of the production that you can fault. The scenes between David Tennant and Bernard Cribbins will break your heart and they both give exceptional performances and they are almost trumpeted by John Simm who gives a bravura turn as the Master that is impossible to forget. Sparkling moments abound from the fabulously nutty cliffhanger; the dogfight and the testosterone stand off between the Doctor, the Master and Rassilon. My biggest gripe is that the first part takes far too long to get to the point, constantly reminding us that this is something important rather than getting on with being important! The second episode is practically flawless, the pace is divine, the character work soars and Davies’ love letter to his era is beautifully pitched. Ending on a gasp of explosive joy, The End of Time closes one magical chapter of Doctor Who and kick starts us into another. Episode one scores a 7 and episode two scores a 9 and the overall mark is: 8/10