What’s it about: The Borg are gaining their independence…
Hepburn-a-Like: The Janeway/Borg Queen scenes continue to
lack any tension or chemistry. They seriously need to rethink this hero/nemesis
relationship because it has never been exactly riveting but now Mulgrew and
Thompson sound like bored housewives who are trying to convince that their
child is the more gifted one. Compare to the phenomenal Sisko/Dukat or Sisko/Eddington
rivalries and see how well this sort of thing can be done. In these scenes the
Queen is literally murdering thousands of people to make a point to Janeway
that she will no longer allow even one silent drone to pollute the Hive but
Kathryn barely batters an eyelid, apparently unmoved despite the Queen’s
attempts at psychology. Surely we should feel something during these
scenes? It feels like the Queen is ticking off a shopping list and Janeway is
the bored nanny looking after the kids.
Tattoo: What is the point of giving Chakotay command of
Voyager and now allowing him to take any tough choices?
EMH: There was one beat of genuine emotion in Unimatrix Zero
Part II (which raised the score by a whole point) and that is when the Doctor
realises that Seven has already experienced romance before he had tried to
teach her the art of dating. He looks hurt that she would choose somebody else
to explore this with but suggests that because they made it work she should
give Axiom another chance. That’s a lovely bittersweet gift from the Doctor
that touched me.
Borg Babe: In the middle of a crisis Seven has a domestic
paddy with Chakotay questioning whether the people inside Unimatrix Zero are
her friends. Perhaps the ice queen from previous seasons was more
effective. I don’t understand the way this episode pans out for Seven. She
seems to object to any idea of a romance between her and Axiom throughout and
after a quick pep take from the Doctor she takes the decision to try and make
it work. But lo and behold Unimatrix Zero is falling apart and she wont be able
to spend any more time with him! Its hardly Romeo and Juliet, is it? The way
the episode goes out of its way to keep them apart only to offer them a
‘tragic’ emotional parting at the last minute is the sort of clunky plot
mechanics a ten year old would write.
Mr Vulcan: Its odd that it is Tuvok who is the most
spiritually aware and mentally trained member of this insane away mission to
succumb to the haunting voice of the Borg Queen. Is it just because he’s male
and it gives Susannah Thompson a chance to breath seductively into his ear?
Would that have been so out of place had it been Janeway or B’Elanna who are
much likelier targets?
Spotted Dick: Neelix turns up on the Bridge simply because
Ethan Philips needs to make a contractual appearance? Since when was he a
Bridge officer and can people just fill in those roles willy nilly?
The Bad: Seconds into this episode (so that is literally
seconds after the reveal that Janeway and company have been assimilated) we
realise that our suspicions are confirmed and this is all a ploy. That’s right
folks, they’ve even managed to find a technobabble explanation to prevent the
Borg from utilising their one remaining strength as a baddie. Now they are completely
impotent and can’t even assimilate successfully! There are no two ways about
it…Mike Vejar is one of the most accomplished directors ever to work on Star
Trek and the best of his episodes (Rocks & Shoals, Tacking into the Wind)
are the best of Star Trek itself. Which is why I find myself troubled at how
weak his direction is of this episode…compare the scenes of Janeway, B’Elanna
and Tuvok infiltrating the Borg here to the exploration of the Cube in
Scorpion. In the season three finale David Livingston managed to make the
environment genuinely claustrophobic, strobe lit, dank, disturbing and visually
stunning. It was a real shot of adrenalin for Voyager. Here Vejar makes it look
as if the assimilated crewmembers are doing a bit of shopping in a green lit
moodless shopping mall. In fact when they enter the central plexus it genuinely
looks as though the three of them are entering a gay nightclub! These scenes
are so boring with none of shock effects and visuals that make the best of the
Borg set pieces work. Its almost as if Vejar is as tired and worn out as the
Borg are themselves and watching the two of them limping home in Voyager’s last
season is pretty sad. His other efforts this year (The Void, Repentance,
Friendship One) would similarly lack his usual panache and I hope he found more
fertile fields to plough on Enterprise. The Best of Both Worlds steals continue
aplenty with a half face shot of Janeway in the process of assimilation and
unlikely source visiting the Captain to give some tough advice in the crisis
(in TBOBW its Guinan to Riker and here it is Tom Paris to Chakotay). Why are
they still using the Voyager theme tune? In TNGs Descent we saw the Borg as
individual units with their own minds and opinions and they failed to work on
any level…so why are we watching the Borg in the Delta Quadrant walking the
same path that will inevitably lead to the same inexcusable place that Descent
took us? The Borg Queen has taken to speaking to little boys in order to
assimilate people these days and convince him that he can have lots of friends
in the Collective. I think this is supposed to be scary but its so dreary…put
this species out of their misery. There seem to be something of Borg coup at
the end of this episode which is something that nobody wanted (unless you enjoy
everybody having a nice happy ending and in which case shame on you) but if you
are at least going to suggest a development like then don’t completely avoid
coming back to for the entire season and then pretend it never happened when the
Borg return in the series finale! Enterprise really didn’t have a hope with
this bunch making the creative decisions. As predicted there is a ‘Doctor
comments on how easy it was to reverse the Borg assimilation’ voice over to
round of the episode.
Moment to Watch Out For: I have always lauded the effects
work on Voyager and on the whole they are pretty spectacular throughout this
episode. Which makes the moment when Unimatrix Zero dissolves all the more
noticeable…what a dreadful superimpose that is!
Result: A limp way to start the season with nothing new on
offer to anybody who has suffered the first six seasons. The Borg are beyond a
joke now and this plays out exactly as I predicted – like a watered down
version of The Best of Both Worlds. The Janeway/Borg Queen scenes are a
complete flop because psycho Kathy seems more interested in bringing down the
Queen than saving the lives of millions of drones. The Seven/Axiom scenes lack
any feeling because the actors share no chemistry and its clear that this
romance is leading nowhere and will be wrapped up before the episode is
complete. Which leaves the plot limping along with no surprises, no logic and
no wit. Even Mike Vejar who can usually be counted upon to inject life into the
potentially suckiest of episodes (Valiant) looks as though he has given up on
Voyager and adopts Levar Burton’s point and shoot approach. The first episode
attempted to seduce with some delicious visuals and the concluding part is up
to the same tricks. The trouble is Voyager has been trying to excuse poor
storytelling with stylish gift wrapping for a long time now and even cinematic
effects can look stale after a time if there is nothing interesting to back it
up. Its your last year Voyager and you cannot be cancelled at the end of season
seven because you know this is where your journey ends. Stop placating the
network and do something really daring for a change. Cheap tricks with the Borg
are beyond a joke: 3/10
Imperfection written by Carleton Eastlake & Robert
Doherty and directed by David Livingston
What’s it about: Is Seven really going to die? What do you
think?
Hepburn-a-Like: Janeway’s ‘aye sir’ to Paris in the middle of an action sequence is a
novelty. Rather wonderfully Seven cuts through Janeway’s optimistic speech about
never giving up by reminding her of the crewmembers that have died thanks to
her choice to take short cuts through the Delta Quadrant to get home. Janeway
admits that if she is having trouble accepting her condition it is only because
she doesn’t want to lose a friend.
Borg Babe: Seven wishing to deactivate the Borg children’s
alcoves is a lovely take on parents who wish to redecorate their kids rooms as
soon as they have gone to university. At first I wondered if Seven shedding a
tear was worthy of a pre titles cliffhanger but in hindsight it is a pretty
significant leap for ward for the character to expressing herself so
emotionally. Maybe her time in Unimatrix Zero did her some good after all? Oh
no wait, its just her cortical implants malfunctioning. How dull. Still she
does have the line ‘I believe I have already assimilated enough Starfleet
training’ which makes me want to kiss her. I also loved the moment where she
realised that she was being manipulated by the Doctor and Neelix in sickbay and
sighed wearying and gave in to their strategy. To have B’Elanna of all people
point out that Seven has made an impact on this crew really makes the point hit
home for her. The initial Seven/Icheb scenes lack any chemistry between the two
leads but Manu Intiraymi really surprised me at the climax by injecting far
more feeling than usual into his portrayal and delivering the emotional hit the
climax needed.
Spotted Dick: They’ve stopped pretending that Neelix is
worth anything more than turning up when more interesting characters frequent
the Mess Hall after hours and delivering flowers to sick patients. I’m not
saying Neelix had the potential to reach Quark levels of quality but he had so
much more promise than this in Caretaker. Seven asks Neelix if he doesn’t have
more important duties to attend to than playing games with her and he simply
answers ‘nothing that can’t wait’ when the real answer should have been
‘no.’
The Bad: Its with some surprise that I find myself feeling
quite sad that the majority of the Borg children will be leaving Voyager in
this episode. There were one of the best innovations of the sixth year
(innovation might be too strong a word considering their dreadful introductory
episode – diversions might be more appropriate) and the perfunctory way that
they are dispatched here sees Voyager ticking off another chance at
development. Whilst it is commendable that Icheb might want to advance himself
by taking the Starfleet entrance exam…we’ve seen this story played out twice
already with two far more interesting characters. Well Wesley Crusher isn’t
that interesting but he is nice to look at whereas Nog’s journey from petty
thief to confident cadet was expertly done. David Livingston is back directing
the menacing atmosphere of a Borg Cube (because stalwarts Allan Kroeker and
Mike Vejar didn’t know what to do with it in the last story) but even he can’t
quite capture the power of similar scenes he directed in Scorpion. It show has
been trying to recapture that moment of triumph ever since and has never quite
managed it. The simulation of Seven’s death says everything you need to know
about character drama on this show. If this played out for real then it would
be a genuinely shocking moment for the show (plus lose the one reason to keep
watching) but because even the casual viewer will have cottoned on to the fact
that nothing ever changes on this ship you know as soon as they pretend
that there is act that would completely destabilise the show like this you know
that she will be revived later, cured by some miraculous technobabble or it
will all turn out to be a hoax as it is here. The day that doesn’t
happen and I might actually wake up and pay attention to Voyager again.
Moment to Watch Out For: The is one scene that crept up on
me completely unexpectedly and proved that Voyager still has the ability to
surprise every now and again. The relationship between Seven and B’Elanna has
always been a turbulent one so when Seven hides from the Doctor’s clutches in
Engineering and Torres discovers her the last thing I was expecting was a
sensitive and thoughtful discussion on what the pair of them believe happens
after death. Its really well played between Roxan Dawson and Jeri Ryan and just
about the best scene in any episode since Muse last year.
Result: Heading off to find a Borg Cube so soon after the
season opener? The trouble with Imperfection is that by this stage Seven has
been thoroughly explored and the Borg have been completely castrated so both
feel exhausted of potential and bit dull. Jeri Ryan remains the strongest
performer on the show so this is still watchable and it has some nice moments
but the overall effect is of a show that is still trying to recapture the
moment she joined at the beginning of series four rather than moving on and
telling fresh stories. Its not an effective portrayal of coping with a serious
illness because we never get a sense that Seven is going to die or explore the
emotional consequences of that. DS9’s Ties of Blood and Water managed to tackle
its theme of facing a deadly illness wholeheartedly and managed to tie it into
the unfolding arc and managed to say plenty about the Kira who wasn’t dying
(Kira). In comparison Imperfection just feels like a string of average moments
with the occasional sentimental spike. Its not a bad episode by any means (we
have certainly seen much worse in the last seven seasons) but its not
particularly inspired either. Its just sort of there – unmemorable and
quietly forgotten but with enough realistic emotion to scrape a pass: 6/10
Drive written by Michael Taylor and directed by Winrich
Kolbe
What’s it about: Tom Paris has a new juvenile fantasy to
bring to life…
EMH: The Doctor has taken to playing golf in sickbay because
his holodeck time has been snatched by B’Elanna. Yes that’s how gripping this
episode is!
Brilliant B’Elanna: More soap opera bollocks rather than a
mature handling of the Tom/B’Elanna relationship. Nowadays instead of blowing
up about being blown off she just calmly accepts that the latest fad is more
important than she is. Slippery slope, I tell you… After she has a token chat
with Neelix B’Elanna decides to go along with Tom to race and admits that she
was ‘a little cross’ about him cancelling their weekend away. A little cross?
You were talking about walking away from the relationship over the tiniest of
problems. This is a couple that should not under any circumstances be getting
married when something this facile makes you consider whether three years
together has been a waste of time. They have one discussion about how fragile
their relationship is and in the next scene they are driving off in their hot
rod with JUST MARRIED scrawled on the back? Did I miss something really
profound in between because on this evidence I think I am going to see a two
page spread in a ‘heartbreaking true life stories’ magazine soon declaring
‘HUSBAND LEFT ME FOR SEXY COIL SPANNER’ or whatever next obsession Tom Paris
comes up with. When Dax and Worf got married it meant something, when Odo and
Kira separated it meant something…this is just a joke. Poor Roxan Dawson, she’s
giving her heart and soul to this episode but the script is just abysmal. Also
it does worry me that Tom Paris and B’Elanna only seem to be able to make big
decisions about their future when their lives are in jeopardy. They decided to
get together whilst running out of oxygen hanging in space and decide to get
married when the Delta Flyer is set for imminent destruction. What is it going
to take to get these two to decide to have a baby?
Parisian Rogue: Around this time last year we got to watch
Tom Paris indulging his adolescent fantasies and building a sexy new spaceship
(although the sexy part was questionable with Alice) and now we have to endure
his love of racing too! He’s a character I find hard to believe in because he
seems to be one part Starfleet drone and two parts 14 year old sex mad car
loving geek. Depending on what each episode wants from him he will veer
unrealistically between one and the other but the show wants to convince that
he is predominantly both. I’m not saying that you can’t be a professional and
enjoy yourself in your spare time. What I am saying is that the writers and
Robert Duncan McNeill don’t have the skill to pull off these most basic of
character traits side by side.
Forever Ensign: Oh bless, look how eager Harry looks to
impress and attract Irina? He acts like a puppy that desperately wants its
master to give him some attention. Hohoho! There’s that gag again about Harry
always choosing the wrong girl! It just gets better and better every
time I hear it. As soon as Harry admits his feelings for Irina the episode
starts screaming SHE IS THE SABOTEUR at the top of its voice. It would have
been an almighty surprise if she hadn’t turned out to be the villain of the
piece but this being Voyager they don’t let me down.
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘This competition is just the sort of
break we need…’ says Janeway forgetting that for the past four years the whole
trip home has been is a series of ‘breaks.’
‘So we scrape shields occasionally!’ – what is it with Tom
and B’Elanna and their godawful technobabble language when discussing their
relationship. This is up there with classics like ‘no need to go to Red alert’
from Equinox and ‘I promise no more affairs with strange ships’ from Alice.
‘The only self I want to be is the guy that you’re in love
with!’ ‘Wow I didn’t know you felt that way!’ Head hits hand over and
over….
The Bad: Its possible that Voyager would have the facilities
and spares to build a brand new Delta Flyer but it feels symptomatic of the
shows bigger problems that even when it appears we have sacrificed a part of
the series it can just be rebuilt between episodes without any cost. I don’t
want to be accused of being a party pooper but reassigning 15 crewmembers to get
the Delta Flyer ready for a space race? Again this is indicative of a show in
crisis (or rather a ship not in crisis) because Voyager should be
limping home, damaged and half dead where such a suggestion wouldn’t even be
made let alone considered and consented. Doesn’t it always strike you that when
Voyager engages with something like this race that there never seems to be
anything else going on on the ship and everybody in all their various roles is
involved? Its another reason why this doesn’t ever feel like a functioning
ship. It was the same last year when everybody was obsessed with Fair Haven or
enjoying the Tsunkatse matches… The Astrometrics laboratory is packed full of
people watching the race (with only Tuvok trying to do his job!) so it makes me
wonder who is flying the ship. I never thought I would say this but it would be
hilarious if one of those Borg wormholes would open up and spit out a Cube to
blast Voyager to piece when the entire crew have their pants down! Muse last
year showed how something as delightful as theatre could be used to stabilise
the politics of an entire world and it did so with real creativity and charm.
Drive attempts to do the same thing with a Whacky Races competition and
the results are as trivial and devoid of meaning as you would imagine. Its
bloody funny watching Harry figure out that the fuel converter has been rigged
to explode…that was my first thought when it was installed so naturally it took
this crew until the last minute of jeopardy to figure it out. We don’t even get
to see the wedding?
Moment to Watch Out For: ‘You’ve got that tough Klingon
exterior. I didn’t think you liked the mushy stuff…’ Yep, this is deep stuff.
Result: Stargate SG-1 attempted a very similar
episode to Drive called Space Race and it was an embarrassing farce that the
writers of Voyager should have watched and steered well clear of emulating. I’m
not sure how many more tricks Voyager can pull out of its bag before it starts
handling its central storyline and engaging with its characters. We’ve had
fantasies coming to life, psychotic spaceships, amnesia, conspiracy madness,
mock Irish leisure resorts, dwarves who fall in love with music, space
wrestling starring The Rock, Borg 90210, a Voyager business con and a haunted
house story and that’s just in the past year! Now its time for Voyager to
tackle Top Gear and for Tom Paris to turn into some awful Jeremy
Clarkson style machismo character spewing testosterone all over the Delta
Flyer. It tries to inject a little character by having Torres reconsider her
relationship with Tom but as usual with this pair the handling of their
domestic arrangement is only surface analysis. Reconsidering their relationship
is hardly the best foundation for a marriage and the conversation that they
have that wraps up their doubts is so awkward and unconvincing I’m not sure why
they bothered. As usual the effects work is terrific but similarly the plot is
predictably tired and lacking surprises and limps home to a not very
interesting conclusion. This might have been a fun diversion if this show
hadn’t been reduced to nothing but fun diversions. Unlike season six which at
least offered some glimmer of hope every other episode season seven has kicked
off in especially mundane style: 4/10
Repression written by Mark Haskell Smith and directed by
Winrich Kolbe
What’s it about: Somebody is attacking the Maquis members on
the ship…
Tattoo: ‘I should have known he’d turn up again!’ says
Chakotay of some random Bajoran Maquis member who is still in the Alpha
Quadrant. Given the circumstances Voyager is in this line is as implausible as
the twist itself.
Mr Vulcan: I’ve got to the stage now where I cannot
differentiate between Tim Russ playing Tuvok as a mindless automaton or whether
he is simply bored to tears with this role. Throughout Repression both of these
interpretations were very much in evidence. A good comparison with Russ is Rene
Auberjonois as Odo because they have similar roles within their respective
shows, don’t like showing their feelings and lack any kind of pretence. And yet
Auberjonois takes you on a roller coaster ride of emotions and devastatingly
good performances over DS9’s seven year run but Russ simply looks like he
doesn’t give a toss. I used to think his controlled performance was a skilful one
but there is so little of anything but dull competence to how he delivers his
lines at this point that I can only surmise that Russ (as he has publicly
stated) was exhausted of this thankless role. Tuvok suggests that emotional
involvements lead to unpredictable behaviour…nice one Tuvok! Suggesting that
nobody has an emotional relationship with anyone just in case they wind up
murdering each other!
Parisian Rogue: Tom Paris really has his head in the past,
doesn’t he? So much so that I wonder if he ever spends any of his leisure time
in the future. The cinema sequences look pretty cute but as usual there is no
substance here beyond the looking pretty cute. Why do we never see him
and B’Elanna doing stuff that she considers fun?
Forever Ensign: Watching Tuvok investigate Harry Kim is
priceless. How anybody could think that this chump could be capable of anything
but boring somebody into a coma is beyond me.
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘There hasn’t been any hostility between
the Maquis and the rest of the crew for years!’ – yeah don’t we bloody well
know it! Try not to point out the mistakes you have made during your run in the
last season, Voyager!
‘At least we can rule out Naomi Wildman!’ – what a shame
because that would have been a great twist!
The Bad: Tom Paris and B’Elanna find a Bajoran crewmember in
a coma in their holodeck simulation of a 20th Century cinema –
that’s a new one! Signposting the next attack by following a random crewmember
into a dark and isolated location guts this scene of any tension. There’s even
a shot of Tuvok coming from the Jeffries Tube as he pursues his victim rather
gutting the surprise twist. More to the point how rubbish are comas as
an attack? Why doesn’t Tuvok just kill them? Leave it this show to introduce a
fun character like Chell in its first season (Learning Curve) and not have him
return to the series until the last season for a one off appearance. By even
attempting to stir up tension between the Maquis and the Federation in such a
contrived matter only serves to remind us how this potentially dramatic and
long term storyline was just dumped in favour of ‘goofy premise of the week.’
As soon as Tuvok starts spouting religious dogma you quickly realise that this
isn’t going to be about anything significant but an emulation of other, better
versions of this story in superior shows. He talks like this because that is
how religious nut jobs happen to talk in poorly written dramas. I’m
trying to get my head around this whole scenario but it really hurts when I do
so bear with me…this Bajoran Maquis fanatic who is 35,000 light years on Earth
has managed to send a transmission to Tuvok so he can incapacitate his former
colleagues in a bizarre revenge effort because they wouldn’t listen to his
ideas when they were all terrorists together. He implanted secret instructions
in Tuvok’s head seven years ago to do so somehow knowing that this ship would
be trapped in the Delta Quadrant and now thanks to their many leaps forward he
can put his plan into motion. Can I just one question? Or rather the same
question over and over? Why? Why? Why? Why? What is the purpose of his
plan? There is no purpose. What is his motive? There is no motive. What can he
possibly achieve? There is nothing to achieve. Its just a way of having
something disruptive happen on the ship and to try and tie it in with a long
defunct arc strand. To have this retarded bilge as the explanation beggars
belief. I’ve gone beyond expecting any great intelligence from this show or any
kind of satisfactory conclusion to any episode but this is in a whole new
league of its own. Screaming hysterical Tuvok? Done before. Taking over the
ship? Done before? A Maquis rebellion should have played out for real
around season two/three and not left until the final season with such a diabolical
plot device prompting it. It feels remarkably out of place coming four years
too late when any tension from the situation has been bled away and was anybody
convinced that this was how things were going to stay? It was bloody funny
watching everybody (including the director) react to the scene where Chakotay
asks Tuvok to kill Janeway so seriously. The way the music stabs at the scene,
the close ups, the intensity of the performances…its just the most ridiculous
thing I have ever seen! And its really funny because of it! They work
their way through the Maquis members and take the ship back and everything is
back to normal with no consequences for anybody. What the hell was the point of
all this bollocks? Once again half the crew seem to be enjoying recreation time
together on the holodeck including all of the senior staff. Who the hell is
running the ship?
Moment to Watch Out For: Probably the best moment was when
the end credits came up. Then I could start assigning blame.
Result: I tried to like this, I really did but it goes so
beyond mentally handicapped it and saps any goodwill you might have by the end
and leaves you dazed and confused that such a terrible piece of writing could
ever make it to the screen. This is basically an episode of Tuvok, Life on
the Streets where like Odo in The Alternative he is forced into the
situation of having to track down himself. That idea was dodgy enough when DS9
made an attempt to realise it but Voyager sinks even lower but adding in
obsolete arc elements, ridiculous twists and distinct lack of any intelligence.
This is the last episode of Voyager to be directed by virtuoso director Winrich
Kolbe and you can understand why…he must have charted this series going to the
dogs over many seasons and after being handed this script must have thought
enough was enough and his reputation was on the line! He does attempt all
manner of camera and lighting tricks to heighten the tension but none of this
penetrates when the story that is playing out is so goofy. Everything is thrown
into the pot; religious zealots, zombie Maquis crewmembers, an emotional Tuvok,
attempted mutiny…fun if you are the mood for something completely b-movie but
played so straight by all the cast it is impossible to watch without laughing at
them. Repression might have worked if everybody had played this story up
and turned it into a camp classic but the resulting episode is Voyager at its
most lobotomised and (ironically considering this adjective could sum up two
thirds of its run) pointless: 2/10
Critical Care written by James Khan and directed by Terry
Windell
What’s it about: The Doctor is kidnapped for a Snake Oil
salesman…
Hepburn-a-Like: Brilliant, look at Janeway’s face
when she tries to sort out the differences between a married couple whilst on
the scent of the Doctor. Her lack of interest practically mirrored mine!
EMH: Being a good Doctor is part of the EMH’s being, it is
literally programmed into his core. So I’m not sure what there is to be learnt
by putting him into this scenario aside from the fact that he is willing to
fight for a patients rights. There’s nothing new to be discovered so this
episode isn’t taking a character angle, its resting its worth entirely on how
this civilisation is presented and that is only by two rooms. I’m not trying to
be harsh for the sake of it but I cannot imagine a single episode of DS9 where
I didn’t at least learn something new and fresh about one of the regulars and
the writers of that show certainly wouldn’t manipulate one of those characters
into a situation that tells you something you already know about them. It feels
like a waste of time. Time this show doesn’t have for much longer. Because the
Doctor is so blasé about treating the sick and self assured when one of his
patients is cured you know that there is a massive lesson coming his
way. Its signposted all over his smug face. The feeling you get from healing
somebody is infectious. As a result of the Doctor’s involvement sick patients
are sent home to suffer…stick that in your pipe and smoke it, Doc!
Mr Vulcan: Tuvok is beyond rubbish as a security officer
these days? If he isn’t committing the crimes himself (Repression) or
completing missing an explosive device being installed into the Delta Flyer
(Drive) he allows the Doctor to be stolen right under their very noses. I bet
if somebody had the time (and the inclination because I certainly don’t) you
could compile a massive list of criminal infractions that have occurred on
Voyager over the years that would make this character completely defunct.
Parisian Rogue: This time around we see the result of Tom
and Harry playing hockey in the holodeck. I get the fact that you have to have
some off time to balance your working life but when was the last time we
actually saw this pair at work? Has Voyager turned into a floating fun palace
now?
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘I’m going to expose you!’ ‘To whom? The
people who employ me?’
The Good: You can guess that it will be the Doctor that the
alien is offering up as a business proposition but its still a nice surprise
and the most intriguing set up to an episode so far this year. Its always nice
to see Gregory Itzin turn up in Trek and he gives a typically thoughtful
performance. Fortunately there is nothing in place in British society that
proclaims that if an individual is more valuable to society they will receive
better care but there is always the method of paying for better care which kind
of amounts to the same thing. Its not an ideal situation and its
certainly something worth commenting on. Especially when you focus on poorer
countries that offer very little if nothing to those who cannot afford it.
The Bad: Do you know for once I am not certain that a CGI
landscape has lived up to its promise. The matte paintings were often
problematical in that they looks gorgeous but you could really do much but
track in on them. We’ve had a number of CGI landscapes that have offered much
more scope to sweep in and explore in a very 3D way (the Borg City is a great
example). But the opening moments of this episode whilst affording the chance
to track and shuttle 360 degrees into the city looks distinctly cartoonish and
fake. A shame because its these effects that are propping up Voyager at the
moment. The energetic hospital sequences are shot in a very similar way to
those of DS9’s Nor the Battle to the Strong but in that episode it was dealt in
a far more sophisticated, economic manner plus had the claustrophobia of the
approaching Klingon attack and the blistering character study of Jake to
juggle. Haven’t we also done the conmen angle to death on this show too?
Originality has truly gone right out the window now – Live Fast and Prosper
offered a more intriguing set up within this premise but a weaker episode.
Didn’t Concerning Flight play about with this exact plot of Voyager chasing
stolen property? And Manuveres? Oh Manuveres…remember back then when
this show was engaging and telling decent standalones and arcs? I don’t
understand the ending at all – surely Dyseck realises that Chellick shouldn’t
be a red patient because he runs the entire hospital! Is he such a drone that
he cannot see that he has been deliberately infected and given a false
identity? Characters behaving so stupidly to make a point does not a satisfying
climax make! Its an overly simplistic ending to an overly simplistic episode.
Moment to Watch Out For: Neelix’s cooking is turning men
into thieves these days! That’s some cuisine! The scene where he poisons Gar is
without a doubt the finest in the episode. If he was written this well every week
he would be in fine shape.
Result: This is hardly classic Trek but it is dealing
with classic Trek philosophy and that at least makes it worth a watch. Which is
definitely a step in the right direction for season seven. By having different
floors in hospital that offer different levels of care depending on your
affluence is about as simplistic as you could break this down without actually
reaching out of the screen and shaking the audience to ensure the moral of the
story goes in but it does at least make a valid point about the varying
treatments you get depending upon how affluent you are. The plotting is
extremely predictable and you can guess the rest of the episode about ten
minutes in with the Doctor disobeying the rules that he finds unfair and then
discovering that things are how they for a reason and even his little rebellion
at the end turning those in charge into patients so they know what it feels
like. I don’t quite understand the point of placing the Doctor in a scenario
where we learn nothing new about his character because the setting and premise
aren’t exactly enough to justify this diversion and the scenes aboard Voyager
are typically dreary. Sentiment might have been enough to scrape a pass in the
past but what I want is knockout Doctor episode in the vein of Latent Image or
Tinker Tenor Soldier Spy. Fortunately it looks like that will be delivered in
Flesh and Blood coming up but in the meanwhile this is the seventh under
performer in a row (Imperfection was okay but still far from anything special)
as Voyager limps its way to its climax: 5/10
Inside Man written by Robert Doherty and directed by Allan
Kroeker
What’s it about: Is Voyager really going home this
time?
Borg Babe: It’s a shame that it means nothing because the
Reg hologram is a fake because him telling Seven that she has inspired millions
back home and that she has given hope to everybody who has lost someone to the
Borg is exactly the sort of stuff that Voyager should be handling in its last
year. The impact on these characters and the impact on the Earth when they come
home.
Parisian Rogue: At least Tom isn’t getting hopes up that
they aren’t going to return home. Someone on this crew remembers the several
dozen promise of a quick journey home they have already been tricked by.
Forever Ensign: Oh don’t get me started. Not only does Harry
lack interest, development or appeal but he has also forgotten every single let
down of this nature of the past seven seasons. He’s not realistic on any level,
is he? I can barely be bothered to write about him anymore. He sits there at
the climax looking depressed and about to tuck into some of ‘moms apple pie’ to
cheer him up for not getting home again. Just fucking kill him, he’s a
liability to the show.
Alien Empath: Bringing Troi back was never going to win me
over but listening to her incessant psychobabble is beyond appeal now. Watching
her try and threaten Leosa is laugh a minute, she’s hardly got the same
menacing eyes as Sisko or the aggression or Worf.
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘Its just my luck, right? Lose the
hologram and the girl…’
The Good: The are a number of positives that rear their
heads in the opening scenes including a mention of the mail that was coming
from Starfleet (that was mentioned in Repression but we all know how well that
turned out) and also a continuation of the Barclay storyline. Considering both
Pathfinder and Life Line were two of the stronger episodes last year this is a
good sign. The teaser promises that in a few days Voyager may very well be home
and considering this is the last season it’s the one time you might actually
believe it. Surely they wouldn’t try and pull off another ‘nearly made it’ when
there is a dearth of good stories in the Delta Quadrant and lots of potential
drama to be had back in the Alpha Quadrant?
The Bad: Isn’t this the season where Brannon Braga took a
backseat so he could start planning Enterprise? I never thought I would say
this but bring him back! Seasons five and six under his supervision might have
had more bad episodes than you can shake a stick at but at least there were some
good episodes tossed in just to make a change. Season seven to this point has
literally been one underwritten nightmare after another and should give the
audience a warning ‘Abandon hope all ye that enter here…’ Everything was going
nicely for a couple of minutes until I saw ‘guest starring Marina Sirtis.’ What
is it with Voyager trying to recapture past glories? They scored a massive hit
with Pathfinder and since then we have had two sequels to that story featuring
the same characters trying to please the fans in a similar way. Trouble is
lightning only strikes once and then you have to innovate the idea otherwise
you lose what was a good about it in the first place through overuse. The Borg
are another great example. I hate to say it because I usually find him really
fun but Dwight Shultz gives a really irritating performance as the Barclay
hologram, strutting around the ship like a right know-it-all. The way he slurs
his speech so dramatically makes him sound drunk! When he started making a
speech about all the alien races they have survived it reminded me of how poor
their execution was. The Vidiians were a potentially terrifying foe that made a
number of striking appearances but were simply forgotten by Jeri Taylor when
she decided to add more fun to the show. The Hirogen were misconceived, shallow
thugs that were never going to amount to anything special. And as for the
Borg…they went from powerful enemy on the run in Scorpion to teenagers and rebellious
drones in the last couple of years bleeding them of all their menace. That’s
not to mention Species 8471 that were defeated through diplomacy and the Kazon
who were dumped at the same time as two of the greatest character this show has
known. What a legacy. The insane premises get worse and worse this season –
this episode is based on the principle that the three nomad Ferengi characters
have bypassed a Reg Barclay hologram in order to trick Voyager into a specific
location where they can steal Seven of Nine’s nanoprobes and sell them! Where
do I start with the bad? For a start nobody does the Ferengi like DS9 and these
three characters are all completely forgettable and pretty irritating. Secondly
- the Ferengi have the technical skill to put all this in place? Thirdly –
isn’t their an easy way of making profit in the Alpha Quadrant without trying
to exploit the insanely over complicated situation with Voyager in the Delta
Quadrant? Fourthly – who the fuck would want Borg nanoprobes anyway? Basically
Voyager wanted a slice of DS9, didn’t they? Stories in the Alpha Quadrant are
popular and Ferengi episodes were a hit with a certain crowd so they thought
they could shove it all into one episode and hope that the average Star Trek
fan would submit despite the nonsensical plot and ideas. Not this fan.
It pretty much follows the same path as Repression with a message from the
Alpha Quadrant springing a trap for the idiots on Voyager and it makes about as
much sense. Somehow even the beach scenes are lacking because they pick the one
day to shoot in the US when the sun isn’t out. I’m starting to wonder if the
crew of Voyager are really easily amused…because the Reg hologram’s impression
of Janeway isn’t very funny. Why does the Voyager even want to get home…there
awaits a Federation that is supposedly putting itself together after a long
bloody war with the Dominion whereas this ship has become a floating fun palace
in a danger free zone. The Barclay/Leosa relationship lacks any believability –
I refuse to believe there was ever a point where these two were together. What
about the Scooby Doo way they find out the Reg hologram is a fraud? The Ferengi
are such childish misogynists you see so they cannot resist programming their
holograms the same way. As such the fake Reg starts trying to romance Seven of
Nine to the Doctor’s dismay and when he pulls him up on it he goes nuts. So the
Doctor reports this to Janeway…etc, etc. Seriously? The Ferengi are that
dumb that couldn’t have just programmed Reg to behave how his counterpart does?
Moment to Watch Out For: The climax where the Ferengi are
‘defeated’ is such a damp squib I’m not sure why they bothered (the three of
them just sigh in unison). Had we gone from the revelation of their plan to a
Janeway voiceover saying ‘we’ve defeated the Ferengi but I wont bother telling
you how’ it would have had exactly the same effect.
Fashion Statement: Troi has had her fair share of bad
hairdos in her time but this has to rank pretty low.
Result: Despite an annoying Reg hologram the first fifteen
minutes of Inside Man are out and out the best thing about season seven so far
and actually seem to be leading somewhere special with the possibility of the
crew getting home and handling some of the long overdue character threads that
that would entail. I should have known not to get my hopes up. It was around
the point where the message gets beamed back to the Ferengi and you realise
this episode is one long con and was merely an excuse to revel in pointless
Barclay/Troi scenes on the beach. What is wrong with this show? Its like
they know exactly where they need to be and what they need to be doing but
continually snatch away from bothering in favour of something more facile. This
might have worked had the norm on Voyager been that these sorts of episodes
were decent character dramas and had real consequences for the series so this
could have been a one off bit of fluff but this show has descended into nothing
but fluff so there is certainly nothing here to make it stand out from the
crowd. In fact the only emotion I felt in the second half of the episode was
anger that they would toss such potential away. Its another example of
Playschool ABC plotting boiling everything down to its most simplistic level
and even worse the Voyager crew are made to look like complete saps for
believing another con promising them a quick trip home. Worse, the audience is
too. I’m not sure how you can go from promising so much and delivering so
little but somehow Voyager always manages to find a way. Was anybody watching
this show in its final season beyond hardcore Trek fans? Another
disappointment: 3/10
Body and Soul written by Eric Morris, Phyllis Strong &
Mike Sussman and directed by Robert Duncan McNeill
What’s it about: Why is Seven getting drunk and coming onto
women?
EMH & Borg Babe: When the Doctor talks about the
‘miracle of creation’ he makes it sound rather poetic. Seven is very cheeky
these days suggesting that they disable the Doctor’s vocal processors to make
chasing comets with him a lot more tolerable! Whilst her portrayal of the
Doctor is extremely broad and pantomimic (I don’t believe he is always quite
this smug and facetious) it is always extremely funny and that covers a
multitude of sins in my book. Ugh, somehow the Doctor in Seven’s body manages
to make eating sound absolutely disgusting even when he is enthusing about it.
She usually avoids foods that are rich because she does have a figure to
maintain! The Doctor starts ranting in her body about how he was the only one
who saw Seven’s true potential, blah blah blah…and all I could think was she
is going to kill you when she gets her body back. Her accusation that the
Doctor has been abusing her body is entirely accurate and its embarrassing to
think that she was entirely aware the whole time! Unfortunately the Doctor
falls for a woman whilst inside Seven’s body (which I rather suspect might have
been the original titillating premise of this episode) and whilst it is hardly
to Shakespeare’s level of gender mishaps it does provide more broad, smirksome
humour.
Mr Vulcan: Much like Kira and Odo’s reconciliation was dealt
with in You Are Cordially Invited as a minor subplot was bound to get some
peoples backs up, Tuvok’s Pon Farr is also relegated to minimum screen time and
mostly handled in a pretty silly way too. It does seem a little odd considering
Vorik enjoyed an entire episode to deal with his puberty bursting free but
perhaps this is one example when Voyager looked back and thought ‘been there,
done that.’ I can’t make any promises on that score but just perhaps.
Parisian Rogue: I found Paris’ comment to Tuvok about his
Pon Farr quite insulting. As the stand-in medic he should be offering sympathy
but instead he offers another jibe at the Vulcan. Write this character out would
you and then McNeill can direct the rest of the series! His ‘it’s the holodeck
Tuvok, it doesn’t count’ philosophy of telling a married man to get his kicks
in a fake environment is pretty offensive but at least Tuvok turns that around
on him and asks ‘is that what you tell your wife?’
Forever Ensign: Any episode that will willingly make Harry
Kim look this much of an idiot humorously gets my vote. He overreacts to being
taken aboard an alien spaceship (calm down love, it happens every other week), completely
fails to spot the fact that Seven is swaggering around like a man on heat
(that’s Starfleet perception training for you!) and then gets accused of having
really bad BO! Its official – Harry Kim is the new Adric! He makes an idiotic
speech about being the senior officer and his captors completely ignore him
because Seven is prettier.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘This device. What does it do?’ ‘That’s
a standard food replicator’ ‘Can it be used to create bio weapons?’ ‘Not unless
you count Mr Neelix’s Bolian soufflé!’
‘You became sexually aroused in my body!’
‘I prepared just the way you like it with no herbs or spices
of any kind! Its practically tasteless’ – this episode also has a lot of fun
taking the mickey out of Tuvok which I heartily approve of too.
The Good: Its quite shocking to admit but something
unpredictable and unknowable happens at the beginning of this episode…in this
relentlessly predictable season it is the ultimate refreshment! Just why is the
Delta Flyer being towed into this much ship? Megan Gallagher is an actress that
isn’t afraid to reappear in various Star Trek episodes and she’s always pretty
good when she does appear. This isn’t quite as memorable as her turn in Little
Green Men but she still does everything the plot requires of her and then some.
There is quite a succinct point made that Seven would make quite a good
hologram and the Doctor a good human and they could learn a great deal from
each other in this situation.
The Bad: Its only when Robert Picardo is playing the Doctor
again that you realise that the Doctor is in no way as over the top as Ryan is
playing him. Its all for effect but what an effect. Megan Gallagher’s
character just happened to be raised by a photonic? That’s lucky otherwise the
Doctor might not have been able to sympathise with her. Much like Profit &
Lace it takes a comic Star Trek style twist in order for them to consider a
male/male kiss and somehow it loses its impact when it’s a male inside a
females body. The same when it comes to Seven enjoying a massage from another
woman. Why can’t Trek explore issues of homosexuality for real? If Doctor Who
will happily flaunt it and that is supposed to be a family show why does an
adult show shy away from it? Of course there has to be room for the
token space fight even in an episode this irreverent.
Moment to Watch Out For: The last scene is an absolute gem
with Seven actually taking something from this experience and sharing her new
appreciation of richer foods with the Doctor in a very intimate way. Can’t all
the episodes be about this pair? What’s that? The next episode is about Harry
Kim…?
Fashion Statement: How hot is Seven when she lets her hair
down?
Result: A real coup for Voyager – a decent episode! Bestill
my beating heart! Robert Duncan McNeill has directed two absolute belters
previously (Unity & Someone to Watch Over Me) and one middling but
interesting piece (Sacred Ground) and he comes up trumps here with a comic gem
that allows Jeri Ryan the chance to really spread her wings and run with
something gigglesome. Its one of those episodes where you have to try and put
all rationality aside (because the
Doctor behaves outrageously and completely out of character) because the net
result is so entertaining (trust me there have been times when characters have
behaved intolerably and the situations have been contrived and this hasn’t
been the case). Body & Soul has a lightweight A plot and a heavy B plot and
some might complain that it should be the other way around but I don’t know if
I could have handled an hour of Tuvok trying to resist his sexuality - Jeri
Ryan coming on to Megan Gallagher is much more amusing. Its not the funniest
Trek comedy but it still made me laugh a lot and in this wilderness of a season
that counts for a lot. Somebody get Paris off the ship and force McNeill to
direct the rest of the season. He’s one of the few directors that knows what
makes this show work. There isn’t anything especially clever or interesting
going on here (the plotting is as simplistic as the rest of this season so far
and ultimately this amounts to the Doctor setting up two people that cannot see
what is under their noses) but for the chuckles: 7/10
Nightingale written by Andre Bormanis and directed by Levar
Burton
What’s it about: Harry Kim as Captain?
Hepburn-a-Like: Every time I think this episode is going to
slip up it actually surprised me instead of annoying me! Janeway tells Harry
that he had no justification for getting involved in somebody else’s conflict
and I was all ready to rant about how Janeway does that all the time. Then
Harry brings that very point up and she admits that she probably would have
mimicked his actions! Bormanis should write more Voyager scripts, he seems to
have his finger on the pulse of these characters and the their weaknesses and
knows how to subvert them. When Janeway tries to defend her actions Harry
dismisses it and Janeway cracks a joke. It’s a very satisfying scene, the
complete antithesis of a similar moment between them in The Disease where he
sounded like a naughty child and her the disappointed parent. Here they sound
like two adults.
Brilliant B’Elanna: What is it about Torres that attracts
teenage boys to her? First Vorik and now Icheb, the poor woman is like a magnet
for adolescent hormones!
Borg Babe: Its rather embarrassing that Seven has to give
Harry lessons on how to behave as a Captain when she has had no experience of
it herself. What she does have is plenty of common sense.
Forever Ensign: ‘The fact is if we were back home I would
be a Lieutenant by now…’ Its nice to see Voyager and Harry himself
acknowledge the fact that he is and always has been the lowest ranked senior
officer on the ship. I can completely understand why this is the case but its
still nice for the show to recognise how it has so severely neglected one of
its main characters. Garrett Wang is extraordinarily good in the scene where he
explains to Janeway that he has never had his own mission, he has always been
an Ensign and he understands why things are the way they are. None of the
histrionics I am used to when he has to emote, just a gentle dramatic strength.
Colour me impressed. Oddly though the only point when Harry’s characterisation
does come unstuck is when he tries to play ‘Captain’ because he doesn’t manage
to pull it off with any gravitas, interrupts his staffs suggestions and double
checks everyone’s work. It almost makes his arguments that he should be given a
chance nonsensical and that’s a real shame. Its all a bit embarrassing when
Harry starts having a paddy in the middle of a crisis because people are trying
to rectify the situation without him ordering them to do so. The truth of the
matter is that Harry is far too young and naïve to take the Captain’s chair
permanently, anybody who says ‘I should have stuck to playing Buster Kincaid’
is proof of that.
Spotted Dick: I love it when people attempt to do something
new…everybody always sticks their two pennysworth in, don’t they? That’s fine,
advice is often sought but when it comes to Neelix commenting on Harry’s
command skill because he isn’t sure what he wants to eat…well in that case I
would tell him to fuck off.
The Good: Wow, is it a fact that Harry Kim episodes have to
feature a devastatingly good effects shot at some point? The Chute in season
three had that winding pull back from the window to reveal the prison ship was
in space. The Disease opened on a detailed and expensive pan along the hull of
a space ship that dived into a window and live action. Nightingale impresses
within seconds with its unforgettable visual of Voyager having landed on a
planet and the crew crawling over its surface. Its breathtakingly good. The
opening scenes of Nightingale actually show a lot of promise with the Delta
Flyer encroaching on a conflict and some really nice atmospherics as Harry and
Neelix beam on board one of the ships.
There is an almighty explosion on the bridge of the Nightingale that
knocked Seven off her feet that really made me jump!
The Bad: The whole Icheb/Torres subplot is a wee bit
pointless and doesn’t generate much emotion beyond embarrassment. Sometimes a
subplot can scrape by because it is so charming (DS9 usually got away with them
that way) but this is clearly just filler.
Result: Nightingale is a tale of two halves. The first 20
minutes are pretty good with an intriguing set up and a deft handling of Harry
Kim’s character as he finally fights his corner and asks for more
responsibility. Then the episode nose dives in the second half when Harry has
to prove himself worthy of being a Captain and proves to be every bit as
clueless as we always thought he was and then some. It shocked me how good
Levar Burton’s direction was of this piece and he seems much more interested in
creating an atmosphere through lighting and effects than previously. Again
there is some very childish storytelling in evidence with the episode boiling
down to Harry wants a chance to be Captain, Harry cocks it up and Harry learns
the importance of a Captain’s role. I have to question the logic of attempting
this episode when Harry’s independence will never again be addressed in this
series but I guess even pointless, retarded development is better than nothing.
A big blockbusting EMH adventure is up next and this is just an empty appetiser
for a much tastier main course: 5/10
Flesh and Blood Part I written by Bryan Fuller and directed
by Mike Vejar
What’s it about: The Doctor’s loyalties to Voyager are
tested as Janeway’s mistakes come back to haunt her…
Hepburn-a-Like: Once again Janeway’s impulsive actions are
the cause of the problem and I recall saying at the time that giving
holographic technology to the Hirogen was a glib solution to their problems and
went against the ‘holograms are people’ ethos that Voyager often promotes. Look
at Janeway’s face when the Doctor appears on the viewer and tells her that the
holograms come in peace. It screams of somebody who is pissed that a situation
has gotten a whole lot more complicated than good vs. evil. The Doctor pointing
out in no uncertain terms that Janeway giving the Hirogen holographic
technology was a mistake is the second time in as many episodes that her
decisions have been criticised. It’s a promising trend.
EMH: ‘You wouldn’t even be considering this if they were
flesh and blood…’ Cleverly this episode doesn’t take the usual cackhanded
approach by signposting that this is going to be a Doctor episode by having a
scene at the beginning that highlights just what the episode is going to be
about. The Doctor doesn’t even gain focus until halfway through the first episode
and that again is a very refreshing, unpredictable take on the usual action
fare. He’s stolen because of his obvious sympathies towards holographic life
but he does make a good point that perhaps B’Elanna might have made a better
choice. It’s a fascinating situation for the Doctor to be trapped in because he
is finally an equal amongst his peers and they need somebody with his
talents…who wouldn’t be seduced by that? He can say he has a place on Voyager
all he wants but you can see in his face how much he wants to stay. Loyalty is
the only thing that ties him to his old life. Its clear that the Doctor is
being manipulated but when the argument is this convincingly made (the blood
that flies from his wound directly to the camera is really graphic) its hard to
agree with his conclusions. In the same way that his argument that Janeway
would be willing to listen to the holograms because she is the reason that he
is as independent as he is today rings true. His decision to leave Voyager and
be with his people is a massive moment for the Doctor and I can’t wait to see
how that is dealt with.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Really? You’d be surprised how easy it
is not to kill someone.’
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘Trading technology has been part of our
life in the Delta Quadrant?’ – wasn’t Janeway adamant that this would not be
the case in the early seasons?
The Good: The best Voyager pre titles sequence bar none
featuring some lush location work, exciting music and a wonderfully shot slow
motion death sequence with a Starfleet execution squad rising from a lake. As
an example of how to get my attention at the beginning of an episode Flesh
& Blood absolutely nails it. Mike Vejar has found his mojo again and
I couldn’t be happier. Even better is the devastating shot when Seven turns off
the holo projector and they find themselves in a massive hangar surrounded by
Hirogen corpses. Voyager hasn’t flaunted some memorable imagery in an age. Its
nice to see that Janeway’s actions in The Killing Game had some consequences
even if the reveal is about three season too late. There seems to be one action
sequence after another in the first episode whether they are on the ground or
in space but for some reason (I think it has a lot to do with the soundtrack)
they feel more immediate and deadly than usual. There really isn’t any room for
the episode to breathe but for once that is a good thing, its like being
punched in the gut over and over again – constant violent bursts that show how
volatile this situation is. I have often complained that there have been a
deluge of Alpha Quadrant races turning up in various forms in the Delta
Quadrant to the detriment of the latters creative evolution but this one
instance where I can completely go with it. Not just go with it but revel in
the shots of dozens of different recognisable races all working together on the
holographic ship. This is Federation technology after all so it makes perfect
sense that they would build themselves in images from the database and where
else are you going to see dialogue scenes between Bajorans, Cardassians,
Klingons, Borg and Romulans? Iden is a fascinating character because of the
shape he has been given, a Bajoran and the process of being murdered over and
over when their belief structure is that you are given one life is bound to
mess with your holographic head. Its no wonder he has developed a xenophobic
hatred for the Hirogen but I don’t think anybody could have quite predicted how
far he is willing to go. The Doctor being pursued through the forest is made up
of some impressively dramatic POV shots. Where was this Mike Vejar at the
beginning of the season?
The Bad: ‘What’s a Klingon weapon doing in the Delta
Quadrant?’ asks Seven of Nine. Why not? Every other Alpha Quadrant species has
turned up in Voyager in one form or another…why not the Klingons? Surely they
wouldn’t be so outrageous as to try and pull off a whole Klingon episode on
this show though? I would complain about the Hirogen turning up after so long
and the unlikelihood of this considering Voyager has made several leaps away
from their space since season four but I’m past caring about internal logic on
this show by now. If they’re here and they’re being used well that’s fine…I
wont waste any more time pretending that there is any consistency on the Delta
Quadrant. Every time we meet the Hirogen they are belittled further. Last time
they were playing fake war games on Voyagers holodecks (I wont go into detail
but if you a full deconstruction of why I thought that was ridiculous check out
the review of The Killing Game) and this time they are doing the same but even
more embarrassingly the holograms have gained independence and are now hunting
them! Its hard to know which Voyager alien race is the most impotent – the
Hirogen, Species 8471 or The Borg but it is a hotly contested race.
Moment to Watch Out For: I love the cliffhanger because its
not a typical moment of action or a TNG knock off but a striking character
decision that cannot be retracted in the next episode and will have massive
consequences (I hope) for the Doctor.
Anomaly of the Week: ‘There must be some fascinating anomaly
nearby for the crew to explore!’ says the Doctor who wants to head off for two
weeks in the other direction and expects the crew to wait for him to return! Is
it just me or is Voyager having fun commenting on its failings this year?
Result: Exceptional build up, Flesh and Blood Part I kicks
some serious ass and then comes back for seconds! What is so delicious about
this situation is that it is all of Janeway’s making and yet enough time has
passed now that the conflict between the holograms and the Hirogen developed to
a point where Voyager is merely a hunting ground for the two species to
continue their fight on. They are caught in the wake of this fight but can’t
really do anything to stop it. That means the episode proceeds unpredictably
and with a strong adult tone throughout – its such a refreshing change from the
nursery school storytelling of season seven thus far. Mike Vejar is back on
form and gives one of his best ever polishes to a Trek episode providing plenty
of dynamic action but also memorable imagery and enough scope for some strong
acting moments too. It does strike me as telling that as soon as Brannon Braga
relinquishes the ‘two part spectacular’ to another writer that the resulting
blockbuster is actually rather good! The Doctor gets to make stand against
Janeway in a very public way and the holographic rights thread that has run
through the series reaches its apotheosis. Just when you think it can’t get any
better even Neelix gets a good kick in! Flesh and Blood is near flawless as
presented but gets one mark knocked off because this is the third time this
season (a Maquis takeover in Repression, Harry Kim getting some development and
now follow up from The Killing Game) where it feels as though the episodes have
arrived far too late: 9/10
Flesh & Blood Part II written by and directed by David
Livingston
What’s it about: The Doctor has joined the holograms and
B’Elanna has been kidnapped…
Hepburn-a-Like: I knew as soon as Janeway found out about
the Doctor’s mutiny that she would be pissed and possibly even attempt to hunt
him down, Ransome style. She seems to think that the holograms might have
reconfigured his matrix when the truth of the matter is that the luxurious
freedom that she has given the Doctor has led him to being able to make his own
choices. Janeway actually takes the wrap for the Doctor’s behaviour and admits
as much to him – this is the third episode in a row that has questioned her
previous decisions. Finally somebody is looking at the consequences of her
actions and she is coming to some dark decision about how bad they might have
been. Maybe there is hope for the character yet.
Tattoo: Does Chakotay even have a role on Voyager anymore? He
doesn’t do anything but contribute the most perfunctory lines throughout this
story.
EMH: The one conclusion that this story does draw about the
Doctor is that he is as flawed as any person and I rather like that.
Brilliant B’Elanna: Rather wonderfully B’Elanna tells the
Doctor that he cannot switch allegiances on a sixpence and the Doctor reminds
her that is exactly what she did when she joined the Maquis. By sticking Torres
in the engine room with a Cardassian hologram we get the chance to see her deep
rooted prejudices against the people and how she has learnt via her experiences
on Voyager that they aren’t all evil. Its not exactly the riveting character
drama of Duet which reached the same conclusion with much better
characterisation, dialogue and performances but it is at least something.
Its Torres’ scenes with Kejal that really make this episode worth watching; the
relationship they form and the how she convinces her to make a stand against
Iden is the most dramatically satisfying thing on offer.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘He’s exhibiting the first signs of
megalomania’ ‘Well he wouldn’t be the first hologram with an ego.’
‘How can I punish you for being who you are?’
The Good: More excitement as this episode begins although
not quite as gripping as the sequence which opened the first part with Voyager
being shaken apart by lightning, sets being well and truly blown apart in a way
that only David Livingston can relish and some nifty CGI effects as Voyager and
the holographic ship face off against each other. The ship is dead in space and
plunged into darkness – there’s nothing new in these scenes but they are at
least atmospheric and in a way Flesh & Blood feels like it is trying to be
the a ‘best of Voyager’ show tosses everything but the kitchen sink in and
offering a glimpse at the series in a microcosm. And managing to be good!
Whilst its marks the end of my good feeling towards this story the idea of
heading around the quadrant and liberating all of the holograms is an
imaginative one. When those holograms turn out to be mindless automatons that
cannot support complex personality subroutines it becomes clear how unstable
Iden really is. He killed a ship full of people for nothing. I rather like the
idea of the engineer and the hologram heading off into the great unknown
together. The staging of the Hirogen on the storm lashed planet being hunted by
the holograms is powerful and it is during these scenes that the conclusion
feels satisfying. Although watching the Hirogen running away and tossing rocks
like kids in a playground is very funny considering their size! And nothing
could have prepared me for the sight of Robert Picardo running with that
massive gun!
The Bad: After the initial burst of excitement it is a shame
that the energy levels drop for the first time in the story. Mike Vejar’s
direction of episode one was a constant violent attack on Voyager but the
second part crawls to a halt after ten minutes or so and the paucity in the
storytelling reveals itself. The first episode was entirely satisfying because
the it was leading up to the decision of the Doctor leaving Voyager and aside
from dealing with the enormity of that decision there isn’t a great deal else
going on or direction for the actual plot to go into. Having Iden make a switch
to a religious nut who will go to any lengths to escape his oppressors takes
the story down a typical Voyager easy route. There’s no real difficulty in the
Doctor’s choice to return to Voyager because there is no way he could stay and
live under this tyrants rule. It would have been far more interesting if the
Doctor had had to make the choice rather than being forced to return. The
sudden change in Iden’s character from calm leader to psychopath is hardly
convincing either. Iden goes nuts when the Doctor suggests the study of organic
culture when they reach their new world and yet every word he utters is from
Bajoran religious beliefs. We reach no new conclusion about the Hirogen here.
They are exactly what I said they were, brainless thugs with very little to
offer as characters in a drama. They are just there to look menacing and get
knocked down real hard. At the end of the story the holograms presence has
become intolerable, Iden is taken offline and Torres and the Doctor are back on
Voyager with no consequences for anybody. The Doctor doesn’t even get a chewing
out. For a show that promised massive changes this is perhaps the ultimate
letdown.
Moment to Watch Out For: For the sheer power of Kate Mulgrew
and Robert Picardo’s performances the last scene is an absolute winner.
Fashion Statement: Check out Neelix’s jacket in the last
scene. Its hideous.
Result: Not as successful as the first part because it wants
everything to be right back to normal by the end and so it has to take its
characters in unconvincing directions to make that happen. As a result Iden
goes from a friend offering an olive branch to the Doctor to an uncompromising
tyrant which guts the story of any drama because the Doctor’s choice to return
to Voyager is made for him. My second issue is David Livingston’s direction
which isn’t a patch on Vejar’s in the first instalment and so the story lacks
the energy and dramatic impetus of its opening half. On the plus side there are
some great moments with B’Elanna and Janeway. As usual with two parters it
promises much more than it can ultimately deliver but taken as a package even
with the deficient conclusion this is out and out the finest Voyager story in
half a season. There has been a focus, dramatic drive and visual splendour that
this show should be aiming for regularly rather than as an exception to the
norm. Ultimately disappointing but very watchable despite that: 7/10
Anomaly of the Week: Surely they must be running out of
anomalies and side effects by now? We’ve had singularity mirrors (The Cloud),
time travelling anomalies (Eye of the Needle), anomalies that effect the
holodeck (Heroes and Demons), dark matter nebulae that snag alien lifeforms
(Cathexis), reality bending anomalies (Projections), anomalies with swarms
inside (Elogium), ones which roll through the ship (Twisted), anomalies that
shield Voyager (Deadlock), nostalgia inducing anomalies (Flashback),
distortions in the space time continuum (Future’s End), stellar phenomena that
simply must be explored (Alter Ego), natural eddies that can rip apart space
stations (Real Life), entrances into fluidic space (Scorpion), pulsars that
Janeway suicidally tries to pilot the ship into (Scientific Method), temporal
shockwaves (The Year from Hell), space folding in on itself (Vis a Vis),
horrific skin blistering nebulae (One), probe eating gas giants (Extreme Risk),
an ion storm (Once Upon a Time), coffee jumping waves (Nothing Human), the
gaping maw anomaly that promises a way home (Bliss), the boxing anomaly (The
Fight), a particle fountain (Alice), the ‘kitchen sink’ anomaly (One Small
Step), the space sickness anomaly (Fair Haven), the getting stuck in orbit and
becoming part of a planets mythology anomaly (Blink of an Eye), tantalising
anomalies on long range sensors (Good Sheppard), the Kes anomaly (Fury), the
alien lifeform trapped on Voyager anomaly (The Haunting of Deck Twelve)… When
people say that space is big and empty don’t believe a word of it! They
definitely should have had somebody writing a spotters guide to anomalies as
the series continues…you could have had Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy style
narration moments popping up all over the place to give them some historical
context! Its become a long running joke that whenever they run out of tawdry
quirks like WWE Wrestling and mock Irish towns that the show pulls out either
an anomaly (odd how they all look pretty similar, isn’t it? They vary in colour
but all basically look like floating wobbly things in space) or a time travel
episode. I guess that makes Shattered the ultimate joke because it slaps the
two together! If I could do you Voyager fans a deal – I will excise all the
anomalies from the show and replace them with genuine character development for
the entire cast and exciting, long running arcs that sees the Delta Quadrant as
a living, breathing three dimensional space rather than a holiday camp to pass
through. Which would you take?
Shattered written by Michael Taylor and directed by Terry
Windell
What’s it about: Chakotay leaps through time thanks to a
temporal anomaly…
Hepburn-a-Like: Even the replicators are turning against
Janeway this season because once she called it a ‘glorified toaster.’ If this
keeps going I’m going to start feeling sorry for the woman! The Doctor informs
the younger Janeway about the death of the ships original Doctor and being
stranded in the Delta Quadrant…doesn’t that rather make her doubly responsible
for events by being forewarned about them? More questions about Janeway’s past
decisions…this time she is questioning her own future decision to strand
Voyager in the Delta Quadrant. I wonder if this season will reach any positive
conclusions about her Captainship during their time in the Delta Quadrant? If
not its still fascinating to see so many people starting to wonder if she is
fallible as she likes to make them believe. It does seem rather lame that
Janeway can make a decision about preventing the Voyager trapped in the Delta
Quadrant scenario from ever happening and then be turned around in a minute or
two by a speech from Chakotay. Have the courage of your convictions woman!
Tattoo: He looks like he really doesn’t give a shit about
any of this. Robert Beltran has resigned himself to the fact that Voyager is
never going to be the vehicle he hoped it would be and so he limps his way
through each episode praying for the end. Watch the way he enters the bridge
around 11 minutes 50 seconds into the episode and tries to give a technobabble
explanation about why he vanished in the turbolift. Clearly he has nothing but
contempt for the vacuous dialogue he is being given to say.
EMH: ‘Its just another day in the life of an under
appreciated EMH’ Clever, clever, clever…I genuinely thought the writers had
completely forgotten about the Doctor’s humility in last weeks blockbuster when
in fact this is an earlier version of the EMH from the past. This engaged me
more than much of the rest of the episode because it was almost using its own
lack of development on this show as a device to surprise the audience. Quite
smart actually.
Mr Vulcan: In amongst all the time travelling we witness
what appears to be Tuvok’s death! Is this actually his death or just a possible
death? Does this episode know what its doing?
Parisian Rogue: Apparently they like having Paris around
simply because his tastes are so unsophisticated.
Forever Ensign: Its really funny when Chakotay from the
future and Janeway from the past discuss how Harry Kim is going to become one
of their best people. Then head back to the bridge and see how nothing at all has
changed for the character in seven years.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Listen Seska there’s some kind of
temporal anomaly going on here!’ and she smacks Chakotay right around the face!
The amount of times I have wanted to do this when I hear those makes this a
clear highlight of the episode!
‘If we restore the timeline remind me to cancel Mr Paris’
holodeck privileges…’ Yes! Yes! Yes! Especially before season six…
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘The Delta Quadrant’s a death trap!’ It
really isn’t, you know. In fact if you were in the Alpha Quadrant throughout
the Dominion war it would be a much more dangerous place to live. Voyager would
be one of those ships that was incinerated in the battle scenes in The
Sacrifice of Angels more than likely.
The Good: I laughed my head off when Chakotay starts listing
all the insane plots that could explain why there are crewmembers lying about
unconscious! He should have just kept going for about five minutes to really
drive the point home!
The Bad: Hang on…Chakotay has the liver of an 80 year old
man and the kidneys of a 12 year old boy but the Doctor manages to solve all
that with a chronoton infused serum that brought him back into temporal
alignment. What the fuck does all this mean? This bollocks is preferable
to characters actually talking about things that matter? Its not even decent
science fiction that can be imaginative and mind blowing, its just long words
strung together with no meaning pretending to be something technical. I don’t
know why Janeway is afraid of anything they come across in their seven year
stint in the Delta Quadrant because she keeps having members of her crew pop
back in time and show her that things are hunky dory in the future. First Seven
in Relativity and now Chakotay in Shattered! Given that we popped back to
earlier, more interesting times in Before and After too this sort of thing is
more than a little tired. Its great to see Seska back but unfortunately as this
is a trip into the past it more like a reminder of how much fun things were in
season two and what we are missing out on now. Older versions of Naomi Wildman
and Icheb that manage to be more annoying than the younger versions? We’re
straying into TNG’s Parallels now! The way Janeway and Chakotay simply walk
from time zone to time zone with so little effort makes this a pretty slack
sort of experience. It feels as if the whole point of this episode is to peek
through these windows into the past rather than to tell a decent story with it.
The macro virus effects are as shite as ever. Much as Chakotay’s speech about
the effect that Delta Quadrant and Janeway will have on the crew is well
delivered practically all of the development he talks about happens in
Caretaker. What about the remaining seven seasons worth of episodes? Amazing
that this is merely a bottle show and that as we walk around the standing sets
of seven years worth of adventures the set designers don’t have to change a
single thing. Funny that.
Anomaly of the Week: Surely they must be running out of
anomalies and side effects by now? We’ve had singularity mirrors (The Cloud),
time travelling anomalies (Eye of the Needle), anomalies that effect the
holodeck (Heroes and Demons), dark matter nebulae that snag alien lifeforms
(Cathexis), reality bending anomalies (Projections), anomalies with swarms
inside (Elogium), ones which roll through the ship (Twisted), anomalies that
shield Voyager (Deadlock), nostalgia inducing anomalies (Flashback),
distortions in the space time continuum (Future’s End), stellar phenomena that
simply must be explored (Alter Ego), natural eddies that can rip apart space
stations (Real Life), entrances into fluidic space (Scorpion), pulsars that
Janeway suicidally tries to pilot the ship into (Scientific Method), temporal
shockwaves (The Year from Hell), space folding in on itself (Vis a Vis),
horrific skin blistering nebulae (One), probe eating gas giants (Extreme Risk),
an ion storm (Once Upon a Time), coffee jumping waves (Nothing Human), the
gaping maw anomaly that promises a way home (Bliss), the boxing anomaly (The
Fight), a particle fountain (Alice), the ‘kitchen sink’ anomaly (One Small
Step), the space sickness anomaly (Fair Haven), the getting stuck in orbit and
becoming part of a planets mythology anomaly (Blink of an Eye), tantalising
anomalies on long range sensors (Good Sheppard), the Kes anomaly (Fury), the
alien lifeform trapped on Voyager anomaly (The Haunting of Deck Twelve)… When
people say that space is big and empty don’t believe a word of it! They
definitely should have had somebody writing a spotters guide to anomalies as
the series continues…you could have had Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy style
narration moments popping up all over the place to give them some historical
context! Its become a long running joke that whenever they run out of tawdry
quirks like WWE Wrestling and mock Irish towns that the show pulls out either
an anomaly (odd how they all look pretty similar, isn’t it? They vary in colour
but all basically look like floating wobbly things in space) or a time travel
episode. I guess that makes Shattered the ultimate joke because it slaps the
two together! If I could do you Voyager fans a deal – I will excise all the
anomalies from the show and replace them with genuine character development for
the entire cast and exciting, long running arcs that sees the Delta Quadrant as
a living, breathing three dimensional space rather than a holiday camp to pass
through. Which would you take?
Result: A big fat spatial anomaly that leads to a time
travel episode? If I just gave you that description you would know I was
talking about a Voyager episode, right? If this were a DS9 episode you could
have headed back into the series rich mythology and shown how these characters
have changed over the years but unfortunately the crew of Voyager (pretty much)
look and act exactly the same way now as they did in Caretaker and so it only
serves to point how little development this show has afforded its cast. The
episodes it chooses to visit verge from the awesome (Caretaker, Scorpion) to
the utterly loathsome (Basics Part II, Macrocosm) and the oddly irrelevant
(Bliss, The Bride of Chaotica) so it is a pretty good summation of the Voyager
experience. I just have to question why we are visiting the past when there is still
so much in the present to wrap up. Compared with the visually stunning, clever
and imaginative Relativity from season five (which this more than a little
attempts to emulate) Shattered is utterly vanilla and the only real fun is in
figuring out whereabouts in time Chakotay has found himself. It doesn’t help
that the former Maquis commander is the dullest character to have emerged from
this series and plods through history with about as much personality as a
mouldy old carrot. If you want to watch an episode that splits a ship into different
zones like this and uses it as a character building exercise rather than
irrelevant frippery than check out Farscape’s Through the Looking Glass. Don’t
go pretending that you have a rich history to explore Voyager, the only point
you can make about heading backwards in time is that we have had to endure
episodes like this over and over: 4/10
Lineage written by James Khan and directed by Peter
Lauritson
What’s it about: Tom and B’Elanna are expecting a baby…
Hepburn-a-Like: Torres has clearly thought through her
argument when bringing the choice to the Captain to order the Doctor to remove
her childs Klingon heritage. It’s the fifth episode on the trot that brings up
one of Janeway’s previous decisions and called it into question and this time
it is her handling of Seven of Nine that is brought to light.
Brilliant B’Elanna: B’Elanna Torres is wandering around the
ship smiling at people, complimenting their work and basking in the glory of
another glorious day in the Delta Quadrant. Either something is seriously with
the universe (and look up any of Voyager’s previous personality distorting
anomalies for a possible explanation) or she is pregnant. Fortunately for us it
is the latter and thus begins the finest character drama of the last series (of
several seasons actually) and the best exploration of one of this shows missed
opportunities. When Torres spots the forehead ridges on the hologram of their
baby you can see where this episode is going and how it will tie into
B’Elanna’s character arc. It has been forgotten more than it has been explored
but we have enjoyed a number of episodes where Torres has had to face up to her
Klingon half and the darkness that dwells there (most notably Faces and Barge
of the Dead) and whilst she has found some kind of peace within herself the
last thing she wants for her baby is to have her go through the same turbulence
in her life. When Torres takes to the holodeck and starts manipulating the
hologram of her own baby to remove the Klingon genes it is the complete antithesis
of a similar scene in Fair Haven where Janeway modified her boyfriend.
Janeway’s kinky tinkering was vacuous, shallow and reputation destroying. This
is tied into B’Elanna’s character, it says so much about who she is and how far
she is willing to go for her baby and it is disturbing to watch at the same
time. The words ‘save changes’ are utterly chilling. B’Elanna has been living
with the fact that her father left 12 days after her argument with him and when
she told him to do so. She thinks that if Tom has to live with two Klingons
given their problems in the past he will find it to much and abandon them just
as her father did. Dawson is phenomenal in these scenes, she actually broke my
heart.
Mr Vulcan: ‘Offspring can be disturbingly illogical yet profoundly
fulfilling. You should anticipate paradox’ Thus speaks Tuvok in his best
scene in years.
Parisian Rogue: You know as soon as Tom promises to keep the
pregnancy a secret that it will have already done the rounds on this ship twice
over. Thank goodness Jadzia Dax isn’t a crewmember on this ship otherwise it
would have been announced before B’Elanna even knew! Forget all the sitcom
rubbish from Drive earlier this year – when Paris comforts his wife in their
quarters after a hard day of taking everybody’s advice they feel like a real
couple coping with massive news. I really hope they can keep this up this time.
Rather than judging her for wanting to remove the Klingon aspects of their
child Tom wants her to simply explain herself and why she feels so strongly
about it. That’s a very mature reaction from somebody who is usually a very
immature character. Tom fighting for his rights as the father is the most
sympathetic portrayal of his character ever. Its something that I often
seen overlooked in drama when the feelings of the mother are explored so deeply
and I’m pleased to see Voyager bucking the trend. Tom admitting that he doesn’t
want his family with B’Elanna to end with one child but hopefully three or four
is really touching.
Forever Ensign: Even Harry Kim gets good scenes in this
episode! That shocked me more than anything! It’s the way they manage to
inverse that dreadful joke (Harry and his unfortunate love life) so that Harry
is mocking Tom and his newly discovered ball and chain that makes this scene
such a gem. Finally Paris is the butt of the joke and its about time.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘I’m detecting another life sign!’
‘Where?’ Wonderfully Voyager chooses the revelation of B’Elanna’s pregnancy as
a gorgeous little dig at fatuous plots of old.
The Good: Its shocking to hear these characters talking
about something as real as pregnancy because even if you just look back at the
last handful of episodes all the discussion has been temporal mechanics,
sentient holograms and body swaps. There isn’t a ounce of real life drama in
any of it. To suddenly have this cast reacting to something as tangible and
emotional as pregnancy makes them come to life in a very realistic way that is
very refreshing. Janeway and Chakotay embracing and offering their
congratulations to Torres is really nice viewing – can’t James Khan write every
episode? I have often praised DS9 for taking hold of a thorny issue and having
the distinct personality of each other crew chip in (sometimes arguing,
sometimes discussing but always interesting) with their unique take on the
problem. It’s a great way to add depth to the drama and to explore your
characters with some fascinating dilemmas. Voyager proves in Lineage that it
was perfectly capable of doing exactly the same thing if it wasn’t off diving
into anomalies, whizzing about through time and enjoying space battles ad
nauseum. Lineage strips away all the usual Voyager bangs and flashes and
concentrates on one issue and has each of the characters offer their unique take
on it. I feel as if I am repeating myself but it is extremely invigorating.
Speaking as one half of a couple who are considering fostering children the way
that everybody does chip in with their free advice is very realistic. The
flashbacks are vital to the emotional core of this episode and it really helps
that both Juan Garcia and Jessica Gaona really sell the awkward father/daughter
moments. Talking about tamping with genetics of unborn children is a pretty
controversial subject for Trek to tackle and all the better for it. Often in
shows dealing with abortion and similarly emotive subjects it is all about the
mother being given two choices and the drama coming from which she decides to
take but Lineage pleasingly presents us with a mother who has already made up
her mind and needs to be convinced otherwise by bringing her own prejudices to
light. Parents have to air their feelings about their children to
somebody, the good and the bad and B’Elanna listening in is painful to watch
because nobody can accept that kind of criticism at that age.
The Bad: I am pleased that the writers waited until the
Paris/Torres relationship was in some sort of fit state to make the pregnancy
plausible but wouldn’t it have made more sense aesthetically if this storyline
had played out in series four when Roxan Dawson was actually pregnant? The
holographic baby hanging in space is terrifying.
Moment to Watch Out For: I wanted to say the dramatic climax
between Tom and B’Elanna but somehow they manage to top even that with the
final scene where she offers the role of godfather to the Doctor. Their shared
reaction to the baby kicking will break your heart.
Result: A spanking new writer and a first time director and
they produce an episode as outstanding as Lineage. There is definitely a point
to be made there. This is real drama, gripping throughout and dealing with
strong characters making tough choices. I would love for Voyager to be like
this every week because it is like a peek into a window where the DS9 crew are
handling these characters. What I found most interesting about Lineage’s plot
was that it didn’t take any ridiculous jeopardy angle to force the story to
evolve or conclude. It was all based on the decisions of the characters and
their emotions. It’s a brave step for Voyager to take and it works wonderfully
and for once there is nothing at all mechanical about the drama that is
presented. It covers a wide range of issues from pregnancy itself, DNA
manipulation, racism and (very refreshingly) the paternal side of the process
and it does so with absolute honesty and sincerity. By the end of this story
the performances of Roxan Dawson and Robert Duncan McNeill reach a series high
and I was in tears as Paris begged for Torres not to make a decision that would
change their lives together so dramatically. With Barge of the Dead, Muse and
Lineage Voyager managed to rediscover B’Elanna Torres in its last two seasons
and go some way to exploring why she was one of this shows greatest assets. A
beautiful character drama and a total surprise, I wanted to give this a 10
because it is so good but there were a few shaky moments (I just don’t like
hysterical screaming in drama - it rather defeats the object) but it scores a
very healthy and top end: 9/10
Repentance written by Robert Doherty and directed by Mike
Vejar
What’s it about: Voyager transports a number of prisoners on
death row…
Hepburn-a-Like: Its an episode that has the opportunity to
push Janeway into an extremely uncomfortable situation and focussing on what
was her raison d’etre in the early season – strict adherence to the Prime
Directive. Its easy enough to say but when you have to apply it to a situation
as tasteless as this it is ripe for good drama. It’s the first time in an age
that Kate Mulgrew has been able to get her teeth into some really meaty
material and she runs with it.
EMH: There are moments where Repentance feels like an
episode of The Big Questions (for anybody not in the know it is a panel show in
Britain where they split the audience in two and throw an controversial issue
at them and you watch them argue it out!) and the Doctor is the perfect
character to argue against the idea of capital punishment and suggest the more
liberal approach of life sentences and rehabilitation. Its so nice to see Voyager
tackling such a thorny issue.
Borg Babe: Seven refuses to engage the Doctor emotionally on
the topic of capital punishment because he has always suggested that she should
be objective in an argument. I guess he forgot the clause that allows there to be
an exception when you are passionate about the cause! It is a crying shame that
it had to nanoprobes bollocks that forms the crux of her argument but Seven’s
assertion that Iko should be given the same opportunities that she was when
Janeway freed her from the Collective holds some weight. Janeway thinks that
Seven still feels responsible for the violent acts she committed as a Borg
drone and that she channelling her guilt through Iko – if he is found not
guilty then the same sentence could be passed to her. That doesn’t quite hold
up as well (because we have seen no evidence that Seven has ever felt remorse
about her previous acts until now) but I appreciate the effort all the same.
Seven feels awful because Iko is executed for his crimes and she got away Scot
free but Janeway sweetly reminds her that she lost 20 years of her life to the
Borg and that is punishment enough for anyone to bear.
Parisian Rogue: There’s a mention that Tom Paris began this
show in prison…his character has been dumbed down so much since then I had
forgotten!
Spotted Dick: Neelix gets close to some prisoners on death
row…sounds loathsome, doesn’t it? However despite all the odds both the
script writer and Ethan Philips underplay these scenes so instead driving home
a heavy handed moral message these scenes are actually rather affecting. He’s
known as the softest touch in the Quadrant so listening to the prisoners
complaints is exactly the sort of thing that people have come expect from him
but this time he backs up his moral stance with hard evidence. Neelix learns a
hard lesson here about picking the right cause to fight and it’s a standout
moment for the character when he walks away in disgust and leaves a man to his
fate that we know isn’t going to be pleasant.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Its not justice, its revenge!’ – a
fascinating viewpoint on capital punishment
The Good: An exciting beginning heralds a lot of promise for
this episode featuring a bunch of prisoners and warders beaming onto Voyager
and one of the criminals holding a knife to Seven’s throat. Tuvok shooting Iko
through the Doctor (and allowing him a devastatingly witty quip) sees the
episode continuing to deliver. The prison set is rather neat and pushes home
the hopelessness of the prisoners futures (I especially love the little holes
that appear in the forcefield so Neelix can feed the prisoners). I would have
liked to have seen something like this set up a long time ago to deal with
mutinous crewmembers but since that has never happened we’ll have to make do with
a bunch of people we’ve never before instead. When the episode started offering
a sympathetic view on murderers I had to start questioning whether I was still
watching Voyager – this is the sort of uncomfortable material they usually deal
with on DS9! As the episode progresses we head into race issues and how one
race is far more likely to be convicted of crimes than the other and it crudely
parallels the way coloured people were treated in the past (and in some case to
this day). Whilst Iko’s complete personality switch is a little unrealistic his
message to the family of the man he killed really adds a touch of poignancy to
the climax. If you were the grieving parents of the victim you might not want
to hear a repentant message but listening to the murderer apologise for what he
has taken away from you might help you find some kind of peace.
The Bad: Just as this episode is bubbling along nicely along
comes the ridiculous twist that Seven’s nanoprobes have magically turned Iko
into a different man to the one that committed all of those terrible crimes.
Using technobabble to make a moral judgement is not only dodging out dealing
with these potentially fascinating issues but it’s a lazy way of forcing
Janeway’s hand. How annoying. The standard Voyager space battle is about
as unwelcome as ever. Do you think they just have a stamp in the office that
has ‘ALIEN SHIP TURNS UP AND FIRES ON VOYAGER’ that they can just slam onto the
pages towards the end of every episode? Considering Tuvok is the security officer
consumed by logic and Chakotay is the ex con wouldn’t it have been more
dramatic to have given them more of the moral debate rather than ignoring them
completely?
Moment to Watch Out For: Unusually for Voyager it doesn’t
take the easy route and Iko (despite seeking redemption) is still sent to his
death. I certainly never saw that coming!
Orchestra: The music is extremely insistent in this episode
but it doesn’t have much of a dramatic punch which means its kind of pleasant
insistence which nobody wants to listen to
Result: A much better moral debate episode than Critical
Care earlier in the season because it allows us to get up close and personal to
some pretty unsavoury characters and gives them a sympathetic edge that gives
the material some dramatic weight. What works against this story is how one
sided it gets after a time – the message seems to be that all criminals are
nice people at heart who have been misunderstood and you and I know that things
are nowhere near as simple as that. The episodes focus loses its way over time
and it is unclear which character this theme is suppose to be channelled
through – the Doctor, Neelix, Seven and Janeway all get a thoughtful moment but
it would have been much more powerful had they chosen one character allowed
them to go on a more emotional journey. Saying all that I will applaud any
Voyager episode that tosses aside action adventure (because they’ve done that
to death) and tackles something with a bit more meat on its bones and whilst
this bottle show doesn’t quite get it right it is putting an effort in rarely
seen on Voyager in its later years. The intentions are good here but I’m not
sure that the script has the balls to explore it darkly enough (Iko is
repentant through a quirk of technobabble rather than anything emotionally
substantial) and ultimately what we are left with as a reasonably watchable
drama which shies away from being anything truly memorable : 6/10
Prophecy written by Mike Sussman & Phyllis Strong and
directed by Terry Windell
What’s it about: A decrepit Klingon ship turns up in the
Delta Quadrant!
Hepburn-a-Like: Just what Janeway needs – 200 plus sweaty
Klingons plugging up Voyager’s arteries!
Brilliant B’Elanna: Didn’t Torres deny her Klingon heritage?
All of a sudden she is indulging in some raucous storytelling for their
benefit? Maybe its just Roxan Dawson’s unconvincing delivery of this scene that
makes it so difficult to endure. Maybe its just that this episode doesn’t make
any sense to me.
Forever Ensign: Spare me the thought of Harry Kim being
bitten by an aroused Klingon female that he is sharing his quarters with!
Spotted Dick: Neelix comes up with the brilliant scheme of
asking people to double up in quarters with the Klingons. Would you
volunteer? Here’s an idea for a new sitcom…Tuvok and Neelix as bunk mates!
Think of the hilarious possibilities? No, I can’t think of any either… Does
Neelix literally enjoy winding Tuvok up because I can think of no other reason
why he would head into his quarters, put his feet up on his furniture and start
singing Klingon drinking songs. Badly. Did you ever want to watch a
scene where Tuvok has been barred from his own quarters because Neelix is
getting down and dirty with a Klingon babe inside and they both come to the
door in a dishevelled state? No, me neither.
The Bad: Why not have the Klingons turn up in the Delta
Quadrant? Every other race from the Alpha Quadrant has (Ferengi, Romulans,
Federation…) so why not make this episode to complete the set! Its another
example of Voyager completely failing to find anything interesting to do in the
Delta Quadrant though which has spectacularly managed to be a cavernous dearth
of interesting worlds. Its not just that this is a complete sell out but the
entire scenario is ridiculous – a bunch of pre Federation alliance Klingons
seeing B’Elanna’s pregnancy as a prophetic sign that there is a union between
the two races? That they have been travelling for four generations into the
Delta Quadrant to discover her unborn child? Who is making this shit up? If you
want to see science fiction go down the pan watch the scene where Neelix
attempts to intervene between two overly theatrical Klingons fighting over food
– its cringeworthy (although Neelix does get shoved across the room which
counts for something). Why am I watching a bunch of Klingons squabbling over a
baby that hasn’t even been born yet? What does this have to do with anything
relevant on this show? Are they just making it up as they go along? DS9 has
absolutely cornered the market as far as prophecies are concerned and we didn’t
need this little side note on top of their sterling work. Ten minutes before
the end of the episode the writers toss in a virus sub plot that comes from
nowhere! They are literally making this up as they go along! At the end
of the episode the Klingons decide to bugger off to another planet and get out
of Janeway’s hair never to be heard from again. Oh bless there is a token
action sequence during the climax which is trying to be Voyager’s version of
The Way of the Warrior with the Klingons storming the bridge and engaging in a
phaser fight with Janeway. Unfortunately there isn’t the budget, the space and
a distinct lack of James Conway to make this even one tenth as effective. Its
just another Voyager shoot’em up. What was the point of all this? I could
understand if this was entertainment for its own sake but this is so far from
that description I cannot understand the reason such an episode exists.
Moment to Watch Out For: I thought the idea of a Klingon
vixen pursuing Harry Kim through the decks of Voyager in order to mate with him
was bad enough but add in that Neelix steals this broad away from him and then
has hot, sweaty sex with her and I am ready to reveal what I had for my lunch
today.
Orchestra: Once upon a time David Bell was writing an
incredible score for the epic Worf/Gowron fight in Tacking into the Wind. Now
he’s scoring a pathetic honour fight between Tom Paris and token Klingon. How
the mighty have fallen.
Result: A bunch of Klingons in the Delta Quadrant?
B’Elanna’s baby is the answer to all of their prophecies? Neelix and Tuvok as
bunkmates? Tom challenging a Klingon for his wife’s honour? Neelix getting his
rocks off with a buxom Klingon babe? A really bad Way of the Warrior homage?
What the hell is all this shit? After almost managing to pretend to be a
decent show for a short run Voyager is back in the pits with this spectacularly
stupid episode. Prophecy feels like the Voyager writers are having a paddy
because they missed out on the Klingon bandwagon by setting their series so far
away from the Empire and are trying to compensate by squeezing every Klingon
cliché possible into 45 minutes. At least most of the episode is played for
laughs (or at least I hope that it is…most of the material is really very daft
so there is no other way to view it!) so it is b-movie watchable but throughout
I was scratching my head thinking ‘why am I watching this?’ which has
become my default Voyager setting. Prophecy says nothing about any of the
Voyager crew. It says nothing about the Klingons. It fails to advance any plots
or make much sense. Its just kind of there in the middle of the last season of
Voyager as evidence of why this show has floundered so much throughout most of
its run. Because it cannot quite shake the fact that it wants to be TNG.
Voyager exists in a universe now where nothing makes any sense, there are no
consequences and random elements can just turn up because. It has lost
the plot: 2/10
The Void written by Raf Green & James Khan and directed
by Mike Vejar
What’s it about: Voyager heads back in time seven years to
its original premise…
Hepburn-a-Like: Surely we handled all of this ‘will Janeway
share technologies?’ in season two? Its another example of the inconsistent
characterisation of this woman (inconsistencies can be fine as long as they are
part of a flawed character that is designed that way but with Janeway they make
her seem so utterly righteous with each decision she goes back on it genuinely
feels like the writers have forgotten their own ground rules with these
characters). She condemned Seska for even suggesting that they trade technology
and had Voyager stolen as a result. She then did a complete 180 and decided to
give the Hirogen holographic technology which resulted in holographic torture.
She’s been seen giving away replicator technology which could happily create
weapons but when asked here if she is willing to trade in photon torpedoes she
downright refuses because she doesn’t know what they will be used for. She’s all
over the place! I love how Janeway throws her weight around and touts the
marvellous abilities of her ship and then finds herself back with her tail
between her legs when Voyager proves completely unable to escape the Void.
Stick that in yer pipe and smoke it! Hmm…Voyager is running out of food and the
ship that stole all of their equipment is packed to the gills with nutrition.
Janeway in her divine wisdom decides to keep her morals intact and leave the
food that isn’t there’s. Its nice to know that when they are starving to death
she can keep her head held high. Janeway makes a speech about their principles
keeping them alive and you just know that the writers are going to follow that
up and prove her right. Its so irritatingly unrealistic and twee I just want to
spit in her eye. Sometimes, just sometimes Voyager you have to get a
little dirty to survive. Janeway’s idea to forge a secondary Federation within
the Void is hilarious – finally the female Furher is going to have her own army
of races to command! She even says the people who can join are ‘anyone who
agrees to play by our rules!’
Borg Babe: Seven of Nine manages to rustle up a better meal
with only a few weeks practice than anything Neelix has delivered in seven
years! Seven’s method of communicating with Phantome might be ingenious but
we’ve seen this sort of thing done better (TNGs Darmok and DS9’s
Sanctuary).
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Vultures eat the dead, Mr Paris. We’re
not dead yet.’
‘We may lose a little weight gentleman but we wont lose who
we are…’
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘Good intentions are like deuterium
reserves…they tend to get lost in the Void.’
‘Maybe the best way to get help is to give it?’ – oh fuck
off Janeway!
The Good: Watching Voyager being tossed around like a rag
doll is great fun!
The Bad: Now they are just taking the piss. Voyager is
trapped in a region of space away from the safety of what they know (as a side
note the fact that the Delta Quadrant is now ‘the safe place’ proves that this
region of space didn’t quite work out as intended) and Janeway is forced to
rely on her wits and forge alliances with other races in order to try and
survive. Its not just that this is a blatant steal of Voyager’s original (and
soon ignored) premise that is gob smacking – it’s the fact that nobody seems
willing to comment as such. Is this a last ditch effort to try and get some
mileage out of the ‘lost in space’ premise that has been there for the taking
for seven years and completely skipped over? A Vaadwaur ship turns up a year
and half after Dragon’s Teeth (which promised a rematch and a potential new
recurring enemy for Voyager) – a one off mention isn’t quite what I had in mind
when I said I was hoping for their return. It strikes me of Voyager trying to
have its cake (as a show it doesn’t want to be serialised in any way) and eat
it (by mentioning them again they are at least suggesting some kind of
running storyline). Federation technology and supplies being stolen? Been
there, done that. If there is a food shortage then why is Seven cooking a five
course meal for four of the senior officers in the opening scene? This episode
should have played out over two years right at the beginning of Voyager’s run
before the show moved on to something even more interesting. Janeway manages to
escape the Void because she showed kindness to a race of nomads and her
alliance pulls together. Its so depressingly pleasant I might vomit. Shockingly
Voyager makes all these new friends and alliances and we never hear from any of
them ever again ‘Unfortunately we’re all heading in the opposite direction!’
Moment to Watch Out For: Phantome and the rest of his
shampooed hair, muddy body stocking race and their bipetty boppety bong musical
language has to be seen to be believed.
Teaser-tastic: An anomaly that sucks Voyager in like a
tapeworm up a cats sphincter (seriously it looks like they are being sucked up
a cats arse!), an area of space with no stars (Night) and a ship firing on them
(again name your episode). Highly original stuff.
Anomaly of the Week: This week the anomaly has the honour of
claiming the title of the episode.
Result: Words fail me at the premise behind this episode.
Voyager is sucked into a new dangerous region of space where Janeway is forced
to make alliances to survive. What an unbelievable cheek! To be fair The
Void had a pretty good chance of being a halfway decent instalment if it didn’t
rip off the shows base premise quite so outrageously and characterise Janeway
as such a Hitleresque hypocrite. The idea of trying to find one last corner of
the Delta Quadrant that has some surprises up its sleeve is a good one but all
this boils down to is familiar Trek moralising and countless action sequences.
Even visually this is an unimpressive episode despite the fact that we meet a myriad
of alien races and endure space battle after space battle. In both cases they
are far less exciting than we have seen in the past (remember the days of
Scorpion when the battles on this show were truly spectacular?) and do little
to spice things up. Mike Vejar tries to shoot the Voyager sets in as dynamic a
way as possibly but they are just too functional looking to offer anything
visually appealing. There has now been 14 seasons of starship based drama
boldly going where no man as gone before (with DS9 dropping the formula after 2
seasons for something more original I am discounting that show) and the idea
has become stale and uninteresting. Voyager should be home by now and dealing
with the myriad of fascinating consequences that development offers instead of
reminding its audience of how it failed to live up to its original premise: 4/10
EMH: The Doctor proves he was right to fight for command
when he sifts through his memory for tactical advantages from previous battles.
His photonic shockwave (firing a phaser at a torpedo to disable following
ships) is pretty special. His ego is almost out of control now though and he
asks Harry to start thinking about designing a new EMH so he can stay on as command
advisor once the Captain has been returned to her rightful place!
Workforce Part I written by Kenneth Biller & Bryan
Fuller and directed by Allan Kroeker
What’s it about: Has Janeway found a life more appealing
than that on Voyager?
Hepburn-a-Like: It sounds like I am damning her with faint
praise but I genuinely believe that whenever Kate Mulgrew is asked to play a
role other than Janeway it is always more exceptional than her usual role and
Workforce is no exception. This is probably her most impressive and attention
grabbing performance since 11:59. The initial mystery grabs you by the throat –
is Janeway playing along or has she really lost her memory of who she is?
Kathryn and Jaffen’s relationship is about a million times more effective than
Janeway and Micheal’s last year despite the fact it is based on a false
identity. Kate Mulgrew and James Read share a gentle, natural chemistry and it
makes me long for Janeway to indulge in a relationship for real. You know these
two are going to get along famously when he asks her out for a drink and she
starts checking him out behind consoles! There is something rather wonderful
about Janeway being stripped of her rank, the Prime Directive and her
inhibitions and simply enjoying herself for a change. It’s a shame that she has
to press ganged into slave labour and live like a battery hen but you can’t
have everything! It would appear that whatever guise she is in Janeway is a dreadful
cook. When she gets back to the Alpha Quadrant she should pick up some tips
from Sisko. Snuggled under a blanket, stroking Jaffen’s face, Kathryn can’t
remember a time when she last felt so comfortable. Suddenly there is an ominous
feeling about big bad Voyager coming along to snatch her away from this life.
When Jaffen asks her to move in with him she doesn’t even have to answer for
the audience to know what her answer is going to be, it is written all over her
face.
Tattoo: Chakotay’s face has been reconstructed more times
than I care to remember! I’m surprised they manage to get it back to its usual
shape every time!
EMH: What’s this? Following up on a good suggestion made in
an earlier script? Will wonders never cease? Catching up with the Doctor in his
ECH outfit is a lovely reminder of Tinker Tenor Doctor Spy and a nice glimpse
of a show without the rest of the regulars and just Robert Picardo for company!
I’d watch it! This isn’t simply a case of the Doctor’s ego getting out of
control, he is left in command of Voyager with Janeway’s blessing when it
becomes clear that it is too dangerous for the crew to stay on board. He’s
enjoying his role so much that when Chakotay returns to Voyager he doesn’t want
to relinquish command. It becomes something of an ego tug of war between the
Doctor and Harry when Chakotay leaves the ship – an electronic commander with
experienced command decisions programmed in or a human being capable of leaps
of intuition? Whilst the latter has some merit its still Harry Kim and we all
know how well his time in the big chair went last time (see Nightingale).
Borg Babe: If you were going to wipe Seven’s mind and give
her a job then an Efficiency Monitor is just about the perfect fit!
Mr Vulcan: Tuvok is a riotous sort of fellow who belly
laughs when he spots the logic in jokes! Can’t we just stay on this planet?
These are genuinely more likable versions of all of the regular characters! Its
unusual to see Tuvok in such an emotionally distressing state and even more
unusual that a script allows Tim Russ to emote so both are massive plus points
in my book. This episode paints a vivid enough picture of the regulars as new
characters that Tuvok comes across as a delusion fanatic rather than Janeway’s
closest friend.
Parisian Rogue: Nice to see that Paris reverts to type (or
at least his original character spec) when he has his memory deleted and
becomes a bit of a rogue again. Terminated from his job in a labour shortage
and finding work at the local bar, this is a much more appealing Paris than we
usually hang out with!
Forever Ensign: The Voyager poisoner is doing his rounds
again (Neelix) and Kim is suffering from terrible stomach cramps after the Away
mission from hell. Its about the same way I feel when moving away from the
planetary storyline and catching up with Chakotay, Kim and Neelix.
Spotted Dick: I keep forgetting that they have Neelix’s ship
at their disposal…that’s because they never use the thing! It’s a nice reminder
that he is more than just the ships cook.
The Good: The opening FX shot is extraordinary good even for
Voyager’s standards with a gorgeous pan across an art deco metropolis and
blending seamlessly with live action as the workers descend stairs and begin
their shift at work. If anything was going to get us involved with this story
imagery as startling as this is the way to go. It’s the first world since the
ocean planet in Thirty Days that has felt different from anything we have seen
in the Alpha Quadrant. These glorious production values with a staggeringly
vertiginous shot from inside the plant watching the workers milling about. It
looks like Allan Kroeker has gotten over his Voyager fatigue too (as
exemplified in Unimatrix Zero) and his camerawork throughout this episode is
fluidic and dynamic (watch just after the title music as the camera dances around
Janeway without halting for about a minute). The Away Team returning to Voyager
dead in space is another memorable image – I don’t always like it when we come
to the party late but Workforce has already set up an intriguing enough mystery
by the time we return to Voyager after its attack that they get away with it.
Its when we reach the cliffhanger that you realise how well this script has
been crafted with all the plots converging to make a disquieting atmosphere.
Janeway and Jaffen toast their relationship, B’Elanna is abducted, Tuvok is
held down and tortured, Chakotay is on the run and Voyager is attacked! For
once I genuinely want to know what happens next!
The Bad: I don’t know if I buy that every time the Voyager
crew loses their memories (oh it’s a regular occurrence around these parts!)
that Tom and B’Elanna always wind up attracted to each other anyway. It was a
little hokey in The Killing Game and its just as unconvincing here. It would
have been more fun had it been Seven and Paris because it would have caused
much raising of eyebrows once this ordeal was over.
Moment to Watch Out For: The show has pulled off its
alternate scenario so well that it can paint Chakotay and Neelix as two thugs
who are trying to abduct the heavily pregnant Torres down a dark alley. Her
terrified reaction makes this scene a real winner. Its little details like this
that mark this out as something different.
Result: Another strong opening instalment of a two parter,
I’m starting to wonder if Bryan Fuller and Kenneth Biller should have written all
of the two hour Voyager spectaculars! Workforce is pretty honest about its
reset from the start so it avoids that godawful cliché in the opening few
minutes. There’s no way that we are going to spend the rest of the series on
this planet or that Janeway, Seven and the others are going to continue working
here. So there is the double mystery of how they came to be here and how they
are going to escape. What the writers do that muddies the waters spectacularly
is offer Kathryn a life that, whilst not idyllic, is one she enjoys and man to
spend the rest of her life with. Suddenly there is an emotional stake in
removing Janeway from this setting that makes it much more interesting to
watch. You’ll be hard stretched to find a an episode of cult television with
better production values than this one with some truly stunning scene imagery
ranging from a planetary metropolis and orbital defences to some action
sequences. This is one of those rare occasions where both engaging storytelling
and expensive effects work comes together to create a winner. It’s a story that
unfolds at a gentle pace which doesn’t feel slow because it is the detail and
the fleshing out of this world and its unusual employment methods that makes
this so interesting. The Janeway/Jaffen romance manages to strike all the right
chords because of the chemistry between the actors and the sense that Janeway
has needed a relationship of this nature for some time. Intriguing and
beautifully realised, Workforce Part I is a terrific episode with lots to offer
and I pray that it doesn’t all go to pot in part II: 9/10
Workforce Part II written by Bryan Fuller & Kenneth
Biller and directed by Roxan Dawson
What’s it about: Will Janeway choose to return to Voyager?
Hepburn-a-Like: I could happily spend much more time with
Kathryn and Jaffen as they exude a warmth that is very easy to watch. Watching
her move in should be as agonising as the usual Voyager sitcom affairs but it
really works – in a short space of time the writers have managed to build up a
pleasant life for the good Captain on this planet. Kate Mulgrew’s quiet,
understated anger when Chakotay tries to explain who she is is far more
effective than her usual Hitleresque ranting. When all the fireworks are over there
is still a goodbye between Kathryn and Jaffen to take care of. I object to her
assertion that a Captain cannot fraternise with a member of her crew (couldn’t
Jaffen simply be a passenger rather than a member of the crew?) but otherwise
this is terrific scene because you can see that whilst Janeway has regained her
old life she is about lose something special too. Even the parting scene on the
Bridge is imbued with more emotion than usual with Janeway telling Chakotay
that she isn’t sorry for a second that he came after her.
Tattoo: Was that a pause of jealousy from Chakotay when he
realises that Kathryn is moving in with Jaffen? Too little, too late I’m
afraid. You had the chance to follow this up after season two’s Resolutions and
you have failed to do so for five entire seasons. The scenes between them as he
tries to convince Kathryn of her life back on Voyager have a dramatic strength
to them that I had forgotten could exist between these two. It might be the
subdued lighting or perhaps it is the closeness that Kathryn is rediscovering
between them but there is a certain frisson between Mulgrew and Beltran that I
have felt in many a year.
EMH: The Doctor proves he was right to fight for command
when he sifts through his memory for tactical advantages from previous battles.
His photonic shockwave (firing a phaser at a torpedo to disable following
ships) is pretty special. His ego is almost out of control now though and he
asks Harry to start thinking about designing a new EMH so he can stay on as command
advisor once the Captain has been returned to her rightful place!
Brilliant B’Elanna: Its nice to see the Doctor and Neelix
talking about a slow rehabilitation back to her old life for Torres rather than
her simply waking up as her old self again. Not only does this give Neelix a
chance to shine doing what he does best (being super nice) but it reminds us of
how far Torres has come since that grumpy engineer back in season one. It might
sound like self gratification but Dawson’s direction of herself is far more
feminine than we are used to seeing and it’s a tone that really suits the
character. Having taken Torres through the journey of discovering herself means
that the Doctor’s voiceover at the end where he informs that the rest of the
crew have had the same treatment works because we have already experienced it.
Normally all we would get is the voiceover.
The Good: I have long said that I thought Voyager should
have laid some roots down in the Delta Quadrant and spent a number of episodes
(or even an entire season) in one system and fleshed out the area rather than
always trying to get home. You could have character and story arcs, talks of
people settling down, politics and romance. It could have been great.
Workforce pretty much bears out how that could have been done and the results
are pretty damn watchable – certainly more watchable than the duff filler
episodes we have had to endure over the past couple of seasons. We pretty much
start out where we left off with Voyager under bombardment and Chakotay
fighting for his life – isn’t this much more exciting than another boring
opener in the Mess Hall? Voyager is hiding away inside a giant crater on a
moons surface! How cool is that? Did Fuller/Biller decide to toss in every
fantastic idea they had into one two parter? Seeing the multi levels of the
plant through Seven’s eyes is another smashing effect. There’s a
terrific moment where Kathryn walks into her empty old apartment in the dark
and picks up a cloth daubed in blood and slowly turns the lights on to find
Chakotay injured in the corner. Voyager doesn’t slow down its action enough
usually to make room for atmospheric moments like this. To learn that the
threat to this community is the lack of workers and expose their insidious
operation of ensnaring visiting ships and press ganging their crews into new
identities and jobs is a really powerful ending. Its what I suspected all along
but to see how high the conspiracy goes (the head honcho Doctor’s research is
funded by the Ministry of Health) and cutting through all the layers of
deception is very satisfying. Watching the scenes of the brainwashed
crewmembers all coming together to try and bring down the conspiracy is
absorbing. There is a touch of Battlestar Galactica Cylon paranoia to these scenes
(despite the fact this was made before) where Kathryn, Anika and Tom discuss
who they might really be. There’s more of the dizzying mix of space battles and
action scenes on the surface which makes for a rousingly exciting finale.
Watching the city’s power supply being extinguished makes for one last potent
visual.
Result: Whilst they have pull apart this fascinating setting
in part two in order to get back to business as usual next week and that is
unfortunate, Workforce Part II doesn’t drop the ball in the way Voyager
conclusions usually do. Whereas Allan Kroeker’s direction of part one was all
about making the setting as epic as possible Roxan Dawson goes for a more
intimate approach (with lots of powerful two hander scenes) and the result is a
drama that relies on its characters rather than plot tricks and remains
involving throughout. Throughout this two parter it is like the writers are
finally coming to realise how to portray these characters – Janeway indulges in
a romance, Tuvok gets emotional, Torres is far more feminine than we are used
to seeing, Chakotay is extremely pro-active, Neelix manages to be cute without
being annoying and Harry Kim pulls a tactical moment of genius out of the hat!
Why has it taken them so long to get these characters so right? More to
the point can they keep it up? Workforce has been an intriguing experiment of
the type that I thought Voyager should have been doing in its first year
onwards…visiting interesting worlds and telling stories at a pace that allows
for depth of character and intelligent detail. Once again the production values
are gorgeous but this time around the director focuses on creating a strong
atmosphere through lighting and generates a palpable mood. Workforce Part II
only slips up when it has to tie everything up so quickly in the last five
minutes but until then it is exactly how I would like Voyager to be every week.
Beautifully acted and made with an intriguing set up, a memorable location and
stuffed with decent character work. I like it a lot: 8/10
Human Error written by Brannon Braga & Andre Bormanis
and directed by Allan Kroeker
What’s it about: Seven of Nine is exploring a romance…
Hepburn-a-Like: ‘We all make mistakes, Seven. I’ve even
been known to make a few myself…’ The biggest understatement in Star Trek
history but at least after her multiple criticisms this season it is nice to
hear Janeway admit it.
Tattoo: Spare me the tedium of pretending that Seven has
been holding a candle for Chakotay for some time. Not only does the suggestion
denigrate her character to the nth degree because he is such a vacuous bore
that anybody who fell in love with him would automatically lose any respect but
there has never been an inkling that this might be the case and the lack of
chemistry between Beltran and Ryan is painful and obvious. It feels like the
writers trying to shoehorn in a new relationship at the last minute but because
it feels as though it has literally come out of nowhere (at least romantic
flutterings between Chakotay and Janeway would have foundations) its like last
minute desperation. Beltran is so unbelievably stiff during the flirtatious
scenes with Seven (and I don’t mean he has a tent in his trousers) which seems
odd considering these moments where scripted to placate his whinings in the
last year of the show. The only conclusion I can draw is that he isn’t an
especially good actor. But then I came to that conclusion in Caretaker. You’d
be hard pressed to find a break as lacking in feeling as the one between Seven
and the fake Chakotay and yet it is scripted as if it is real. Beltran
is so awful I was continually wincing as each line came out of his mouth.
EMH: There was a moments emotional depth when the Doctor is
admonished for butting in on Seven’s personal life and his former feelings for
her seem to rise to the surface again for a second.
Borg Babe: We’re so close to the end so I don’t understand
why the writers are purporting to take risks with Seven and then pulling away
as if it is going to ruin the show. Its been a long held complaint of mine that
Voyager refuses to take the risk of truly developing its characters and that
they like to offer the illusion of growth in strokes like pregnancy and
removing Seven’s cortical implants and suggesting deeper social interaction with
the crew and then revealing it to all be a holodeck simulation is another
tedious example of that. In fact this episode could be held up in regard as
Voyager’s ‘playing it safe’ creed in a microcosm by offering to take Seven to
new places but resetting everything by the end of the episode so we don’t dare
see any of this through or deal with the consequences. Its agonisingly
frustrating. There is definitely something in the idea of Seven finding her
regeneration a chore and something that ostracises her from the rest of the
crew but surely this is something that should have been dealt with in, say,
season five? The way Seven tries to give B’Elanna a gift for the baby is beautifully done to highlight the awkward tension
between both characters. This is a friendship I would have liked to have seen
developed because any scene between Dawson and Ryan is usually comic or
dramatic gold. Apparently Seven has been enjoying these simulations of a normal
life since Unimatrix Zero was destroyed – that was 16 episodes ago and this
is the first we see of it?
Mr Vulcan: There’s a scene where Tuvok and Seven discuss how
they find social occasions similarly discomforting – check out a similar scene
between Worf and Odo in DS9’s Crossfire which is a million times funnier and
loaded with real character charm.
Forever Ensign: Harry gets Tom and B’Elanna a towel with a
Starfleet insignia emblazoned on it. Well what else was he going to get them?
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘Does this contain enough sodium chloride
for your tastes?’ ‘It could use another 0.6 milligram’s’ – Seven and Chakotay’s
flirtatious dialogue is so hot and horny I can barely contain myself.
‘You’re beautiful when you’re chopping…’ – Chakotay comes
onto Seven as they chop a carrot together. I have never seen anything quite
like this before!
The Good: The baby shower scenes have a nice relaxed
chemistry about them even if they are hardly the most engagingly scripted of
party scenes.
The Bad: Seven plays the piano. Could this go down in
history as the least interesting pre-titles sequence ever? It’s a common
failing of characters in Trek that they cannot interact in the real world and
seek out the holodeck to play out their fantasies on. TNG, DS9 and VOY have now
all played about with the idea. With Barclay in TNG his fantasies were comic
masterpieces and exposed to the entire crew so that was fairly nicely done, if
a little sadistic. On DS9 Odo ultimately does play out his rehearsal on the
real Kira and they end up in a relationship together.
Moment to Watch Out For: That pointless, frustrating ending
that sees the chance of Seven’s happiness cut off by the writers in a quirk of
technobabble. Absolutely hideous, I think its meant to be tragic and it
is but just not in the way the writers were thinking.
Fashion Statement: Seven looks so smoking hot in her red
number that if any man touches her he is likely to spontaneously combust.
Anomaly of the Week: Energy shockwaves on the port bow! Just
in case the episode isn’t exciting enough for you…
Result: Spare me the thought of Seven and Chakotay getting
together! They’re just making this up as they go along, aren’t it? Moving away
from this hideously unconvincing non-romance for a moment Human Error is
stack up with further problems; the pointless technobabble fuelled subplot to
appease the techie geeks in the audience that might be turned off by the mushy
stuff, the absence of emotion in Robert Beltran’s performance, the sluggish
pacing and the unwillingness to explore anything for real on this show. When the
Doctor informs Seven that her implants are preventing her from exploring any
romantic affiliations in the deeply unsatisfying climax the truth of the matter
is that this is a metaphor for the writers who are rubbing their hands together
with glee at the fact that they have managed to shove love scenes on screen for
Seven but also kept the whole dalliance consequence free. Brannon Braga has
been castrated by Star Trek and his storytelling has gone the same way. Jeri
Ryan is trying her damdest to make this material work but even her sterling
efforts cannot overcome the mountain of problems to make this remotely
plausible. A Seven/Chakotay romance has never been on the cards and for all the
scenes between them sink they may have well have used Neelix. A last minute
attempt of Voyager suggesting development and then snatching it away – should I
be more annoyed that the relationship they flaunt is hideous or the fact that
they aren’t willing to see it through? I think I’m passed caring at this point.
When even the ship bound Seven of Nine stories suck this is a show without
hope: 2/10
Q2 written by Robert Doherty and directed by LeVar Burton
What’s it about: Aunt Kathy is forced to babysit Q’s son…
Hepburn-a-Like: Hilariously Janeway looks precisely like my
husband when I drone on about my favourite genre shows in laborious detail as
Icheb lists all of the epic adventures of Kirk’s five year mission. She
seriously wants to close her eyes and have a doze. Q wonders if it isn’t too
late to ask Jean Luc to be his sons godfather considering ‘Aunt Kathy’ is doing
such a lousy job as godmother. Janeway’s suggests that she really doesn’t have
the time to look after Q2 but in all honesty what else has she got on that
can’t wait? Q suggests that Janeway is a mummy to the crew, taking the piss out
of her constant droning on about how Voyager is one big happy family. Kate
Mulgrew seems to be enjoying the more frivolous material this week and adopts
every comedic pose in town to suggest her disapproval of Q2’s behaviour. I much
prefer her looser portrayals of the character so I heartily approve, even if it
does verge on pantomime.
Borg Babe: Rather wonderfully Seven fails to exhibit the
slightest flicker of embarrassment when Q2 removes her clothes. I bet there
were a few thousand straight Star Trek fans that wished those cargo containers
were a few metres to the right!
Spotted Dick: Neelix tries to appeal to Q2’s better nature
to offer humanitarian aid to sick worlds and has his vocal chords removed for
his efforts! Q calls him Janeway’s ‘pet Talaxian’ when he gives them back to
him. Why can’t Voyager be this funny every week?
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘Scan, scan, scan…that’s all you people
ever do! I’ve been through every deck on this ship and d’you know what I’ve
seen? Bipeds pushing buttons! Bipeds replacing relays! Bipeds running
diagnostics! When are you going to do something interesting?’ – at times Q2
sounds like he is writing one of my reviews!
‘Coffee, black’ ‘Make it yourself…’
‘Can I help you, kitchen rat?’ says Q2 to Neelix!
The Good: Q2 traps the entire crew in a 30 second time loop
and condemns them to the same old routine over and over. Perhaps I have been in
a 45 minute time loop of his making for the last seven seasons? Keegan de
Lancie might not be the worlds best actor but like his father he is a fantastic
entertainer and in a script that doesn’t ask him to do any great amount of soul
searching he proves to be quite a find. I honestly think if they had gotten
anybody to poke fun at this crew I would have approved. Q2 manages to be
charismatic and silly whilst avoid many of the ‘stroppy teen’ clichés that can
sink similar sort of characters on other shows. There’s something rather apt
about Q2 bringing the Borg to the Voyager crew just as his father did with the
TNG crew back in the day – like father like son!
The Bad: Make no mistake - despite my goodwill towards parts
of this episode (because for once Voyager is having a chuckle at its own
expense!) this still continues the descent and emasculation of the Q continuum
that started in the abysmal Q and the Grey. Once upon a time Q was a powerful
being that looked down upon humanity and turned up just to stir things up for a
bit of fun. Now he admires humanity and seeks out a role model in
Janeway to look after his son. It is not a shift in his favour. There are so
many things that are wrong with that sentence I don’t know where to begin.
They’ve dragged Q down from the heavens and made him act and react as one of
us. It doesn’t help that John de Lancie is no longer attempting to perform in
the role but turning up as a parody of what the character used to be. You could
happily stick him an American sitcom and he wouldn’t have to adjust his
performance one iota. Its so broad I was waiting for the studio audience to
clap when he materialised. The Itchy/Q-ball exchange need never spoken of
again. Icheb tries to teach Q2 to respect the laws of other cultures – could he
be any more boring? By the end of the episode Q2 is desperately seeking
the approval of his father and trying to save the only friend he has ever had –
he’s human in all but name and dull as dishwater. The ‘we’ll accept his
apology’ means this all boils down to a particularly tedious lesson of knowing
when to admit you were wrong. I feel as though I’m in playschool again!
Moment to Watch Out For: In the shows best scene Q2 turns
Engineering into a sleazy nightclub packed with drunken revellers and half
naked alien dancers! Its excitingly shot and lit and for a moment feels like
this episode might deliver the old school promise of a really fun Q episode.
Fashion Statement: Rather oddly Q seems to be an omnipotent
being with a receding hairline!
Result: The first ten minutes of Q2 are exactly what season
seven has desperately needed – a bit of harmless fun! Engineering is turned
into a nightclub, Seven is stripped nude and peaceful factions and encouraged
into warfare. Oh and Neelix’s mouth is fused shut! Then it all goes horribly
wrong. The episode seems to suggest that if Q2 follows Icheb’s example he will
be a more rounded, constructive member of society. Its probably the biggest
falsehood Voyager has ever perpetuated. All he will succeed in doing is
becoming duller than dishwater and another Starfleet drone. And that’s the main
problem with this episode; as soon as Q2 decides to settle down and do as he’s
told the tone of the piece settles too and into something more akin to the
usual preachy, monotonous Voyager. Like much of season seven it boils down to
something far too simplistic and unengaging and this might have been better had
the opening half’s antics had spiralled right through to the conclusion to make
this a ‘best of Q style madcap piece. Once upon a time I looked forward to Q’s
frequent visits and even found that his first appearance on Voyager was a joy.
Six years on and his antics have worn very thin and you can’t help but hope
this is the last we will see of him. Initially infectious but ultimately
boring, Q2 remains resolutely average: 5/10
Author Author written by Phyllis Strong & Mike Sussman
and directed by David Livingston
What’s it about: The Doctor has created a new holoprogramme
which is about to open a whole can of worms…
Hepburn-a-Like: Janeway is literally holding back tears as
she sees a live image of Earth sent via Starfleet and its probably the shows
most emotional moment in years.
Tattoo: Are they punishing Robert Beltran for his barbed
comments about his character and the show? He barely gets two lines in this
entire episode!
EMH: Time for one last brilliant Doctor story before Voyager
bows, a genre on this show that you can practically always (The Darkling
and Warhead aside) always count on. His ego has grown to such monstrous
proportions that the Doctor thinks it is okay to write a holodeck programme
that shows all of his colleagues in an unflattering light and then have this
published in the Alpha Quadrant. It will literally be the first vision of what
life has been like in the Delta Quadrant for most people. As usual with the
Doctor his heart is in the right place but his brain is barely connected.
During the tedious ten minute introduction to his programme the Doctor drones
on and on decked out in a Noel Coward-esque dressing gown and writing with a
quill! His pretensions know no bounds! After experiencing the programme Janeway
states that it feels like the work of somebody who feels oppressed whereas he
has been given the sort of freedoms that no other hologram could ever dream of.
That is the Doctor’s point, he’s one of kind whereas all of his ‘brothers’
should be treated the same. I do find it shocking that the Doctor who purports
to understand human behaviour enough to create a syllabus in it for Seven
wouldn’t have even considered how his friends would feel about this programme.
Borg Babe: Seven is a right nosy mare watching everybody’s
conversations with their loved ones and commenting wryly on them. I’d have put
her outside the lab with a smug grin on my face. Seven’s conversation with her
Aunt is very touching and Jeri Ryan plays her apprehension with consummate
skill.
Parisian Rogue: When Paris starts objecting to the Doctor’s
insane programme B’Elanna wonders if he might be jealous because he is stepping
on her husbands toes.
Forever Ensign: ‘When is she giving you a promotion?’
Sometimes I think they enjoy beating down on Harry Kim (who doesn’t?). When
letters started pouring in Hunters he spent the whole episode mooching about
because he was the last person to receive one and now there is a lottery to
determine who is going to speak to their loved ones over subspace Harry picks
out the highest number and longest wait time! Add to the fact that he has no
promotion prospects and some people just don’t get any luck! Its wonderful to
finally catch up with Harry Kim’s parents so we can see where this drippy sod
came from and they actually seem like really lovely people. Really lovely
people that created a monster.
Spotted Dick: Even Neelix is really well used here as he
takes a much more subtle approach of telling the Doctor how much he loved the
programme and questioning why he cares if he upsets half the crew. I wish he
was always written with this much tenacity.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘I believe your ego has received enough
stroking for one day…’
‘Interesting plot twist. You get me out of sickbay so you’re
free to give my patient a tonsillectomy!’
‘Your emitter isn’t a ball and chain. It liberates
you.’
‘A replicator created this cup of coffee. Should that
replicator be able to determine whether or not I can drink it?’
The Good: How wonderful for the crew to be able to spend 11
minutes a day being able to talk to their family, friends and loved ones. The
show should probably have been at this point in series four (when they first
made contact with Starfleet) and there should have been more tension amongst
the crew over who gets to use those 11 minutes but I’ll take what I can get.
The Doctor’s vision of how he was treating in the early days is brilliantly
handled and played by all the cast who throw themselves into their roles with
all of the gusto that made the similar scenes in Living Witness such a joy.
Chakotay is a bullish Bajoran with a ridiculous tattoo splayed across his cheek
(‘I don’t know how you think you are hologram but to me you’re just another
piece of technology!’). Tom Paris (sorry Lieutenant Marseilles) a inveterate
womaniser with a hideous moustache. Janeway is a black haired siren who rules
the ship with an iron thumb and murders patients in sickbay in order to get the
people she wants treated further up the priority list! Torres has had her
Klingon half removed and has barred the Doctor from engineering. Tuvok (sorry
Tulok) is a Vulcan thug with a ridiculous bushy beard! Harry Kim is a whining
hypochondriac Trill (this is not that far removed from the irritating Harry we
know…and at least if we were stuck with Harry the crew beat upon him some
more!). The Doctor’s mobile emitter is a giant backpack that weighs him down
like a ton of bricks (as a metaphor its hardly subtle but it does get the point
across). Very cleverly we are introduced to each of these characters scene by
scene and the person playing the Doctor changes too so they can all see his
skewered perceptions of them all. As I was watching I kept thinking he was
going to have an awful lot of questions to answer. Naturally the only person to
escape this piece of work unscathed is Seven of Nine who the Doctor has always
had a great deal of affection for (Someone to Watch Over Me) and becomes a
preachy supporter of holographic rights. The irony of a holoprogramme about
holographic rights being the catalyst for a court case discussing holographic
rights is not lost on me. Beautifully the only way that they can prove that the
Doctor is more than just a collection of photons the crew all step forward in
the court case and tell their stories about what he means to them and how he
has helped them to become better people. If that sounds twee then I have given
the wrong impression, for once this is on the right side of sentimentality and
skilfully done. At the end of this episode something has genuinely changed in
the Star Trek universe. It may not be a blow for holograms everywhere but one
hologram has been awarded the same artistic rights as any individual and that’s
just a small first step. It means that a seam of episodes on Voyager has
actually been leading somewhere and made an impact and that makes me smile. The
final scene of the many EMH Mark 1’s working in the mines and discussing
Photons Be Free is wonderfully zany and proves that (for the Doctor) this has
all been worth it.
The Bad: It annoys the hell out of that this is all we will
get of the crew talking to their families. After seven years away there must be
so much to explore in this area and instead we spend the rest of the series
indulging in standard Trek plots. Its obscene that something that would have
been explored over several years on DS9 (always the most characterful of Trek
shows) is shunting off into a tiny subplot in one episode on Voyager. Janeway’s
speech about black peoples rights pushes the analogy a little too far for my
liking and is the only reason that this episode doesn’t get full marks.
Moment to Watch Out For: ‘Don’t be ridiculous, that
character isn’t you…’ The episode gets even better when the crew get
together to knock an even more over the top holoprogramme about an overbearing
EMH to show the Doctor how they are feeling when they see his programme. It’s a
lesson well learnt and easily the best scene of a wonderful episode when Robert
Picardo gets to play the slimy, vicious, predatory EMH. He’s got an appalling
comb over, barely bothers to diagnose his patients and groans lustfully as he
gives Seven of Nine a relaxing massage.
Result: Despite being a mash up of A Measure of a Man,
Living Witness, Hunters and Worst Case Scenario, Author Author is an
extraordinarily good episode of Voyager and the last grasp at greatness before
the disappointing final run of the series. You’ve got a brilliant central
storyline about the Doctor’s madcap holoprogramme that paints the Voyager crew
in a terrible light that features some wonderfully funny OTT portraits of the
crew we know and love, a fantastic reversal when Paris gets his revenge on the
Doctor and an important message as the question of holographic rights takes a
turn for the serious. Bolstering that is the superb b plot featuring the chance
for the crew to finally be able to contact their loved ones and say some of the
things that they have been dying to say for years. The conversations between
Tom and B’Elanna and their respective estranged fathers are especially
touching. You can’t really go wrong with a Doctor episode and Picardo is at the
top of his game (as ever) but this actually turns out to be more an ensemble
piece and everybody (except Beltran who barely registers) is giving their all
to make this a memorable drama. Funny, clever, emotional and poignant, Author
Author is packed full of the sort of material I would like to see from Voyager
every week. Fantastic: 9/10
Friendship One written by Michael Taylor & Bryan Fuller
and directed by Mike Vejar
What’s it about: Voyager is given its first assignment from
Starfleet since Caretaker…
Hepburn-a-Like: It is revealed that Janeway is the Captain
to have made First Contact more times than anybody since James Kirk…but as she
says it does help being the only Captain within 30,000 light years. When they
do get home a hell of a fuss is going to be made of her, you just know it. At
least she pauses for a moment at the end to mourn the loss of Carey.
Brilliant B’Elanna: There’s an attempt to explore the dangers
of working for Starfleet and carrying a baby. It might not be the most gripping
material ever but I do appreciate that they try and add a beat of character
(Paris objecting to her going on the mission) and an extra layer of danger to
the scenario (because he might not come home to his baby).
Spotted Dick: Neelix tells Verin that when he first stepped
on board Voyager he found the crew to be arrogant know-it-alls and he still
thinks they take themselves far too seriously. Trying to break down his defences
by finding common ground. Clever bloke. It’s the first time we have had mention
of the disaster that befell Talax in an age too. It adds a nice touch of
continuity to the situation.
The Good: I love the idea of Janeway and co being sent on a
mission by the Starfleet from 30,000 light years away. They should have stayed
in contact ever since they first got in touch in season four and then all of
Janeway’s more questionable decisions would have excusably put to one side
because she could have been said to have been under orders! They can be used to
clear away all of the Alpha Quadrant junk that has strayed into the Delta
Quadrant! The harsh, snowy landscape that the Away Team explore is beautifully
photographed by Mike Vejar to make the conditions look as harsh as possible.
We’ve really come a long way from those hideous soundstages with coloured
backdrops! The make up of Verin and his people is impressively gruesome,
certainly the nastiest we have seen since the Vidiians. I really like the
pessimistic approach this episode takes to the Earth reaching out to its
neighbours in space – Star Trek always makes space exploration an uplifting
prospect (however one of Enterprise’s saving graces was that they chartered how
dangerous space could be in those early years) and to see a probe reaching a
planet and causing a disastrous mutation of its planet and people is pleasingly
disparaging of the usual inspiring ethos. The aliens think that Starfleet sent
them technology that they couldn’t understand so they would obliterate
themselves because it is easier than invading them! At least the aliens manage
to think their way out of this situation, all they have lacked in the past is
the ability to put their ideas into action. Rather than having Voyager sweep in
as the saviours of the planet they are merely the means of deliverance of a
plan that has been cooked up for a while. I have to be honest the alien baby is
shockingly realistic.
The Bad: It says something about the overarching strength of
a series that I have watched the latter half of season seven entirely out of
order and it hasn’t impacted the show one jot. Whilst placing End Game at the
climax you can pretty much mix and match all the other episodes because there
is very little development to distinguish an order. Imagine watching the final
ten episodes of DS9 out of order? Carey is present? Lieutenant Carey of seasons
one and two never to be seen since! Are they taking the piss? Leave it to
Voyager to introduce a character, forget about him for five seasons and then
bring him back right near the end just to kill him off! Perhaps seeing him
again is supposed to induce a childish thrill and remembrance of the ‘classic
days’ of Voyager (if there ever was such a thing) but its just another tired
reminder that the creative staff on this show take incredible liberties. It
feels like a very cynical move that a character should be brought back to
silence critics just to kill him off. The woman who has lost all of her
children to the probe I could take (indeed there was something rather grim
about an artefact from Earth causing all of her babies to be born stillborn)
but the cutesy blistered child that talks to Tom and Neelix is a step too far
into blatant manipulation. Tom rushing to save the baby is basically a re-run
of Bashir’s efforts in The Quickening except a million times less
affecting. Ekoria felt like a real person struggling to take another breath to
give her baby life – this is a unashamedly calculating subplot featuring a
character we barely know. Why is it with these kinds of stories that there is
always one dissenter whose voice carries further than those who want to let the
heroes help. By the end of the episode the people have been cured, the planets
environment restored and Voyager blasts off on another adventures. Its so
inevitably twee and perfect (especially the godawful shot of the sun coming
out) its enough to make you stop watching television and take up fishing.
Moment to Watch Out For: Odd that nobody seems to give a
shit about Carey’s death about two minutes after it has occurred. Had this been
a regular character this would have been given far more impact. It feels like
the show is trying to be bold by killing somebody off but without it being
somebody that counts it was never going to impact.
Teaser-tastic: I got a pleasing Blink of an Eye vibe from
the intriguing teaser that sees Friendship One entering the atmosphere of a
suspiciously Earth like planet. Is this going to be another clever-clever high
concept episode to rival the season six classic?
Result: The most vanilla episode of the season so far.
There’s nothing exclusively wrong with Friendship One; its pleasantly scripted,
pleasantly acted and pleasantly filmed but there is no part of it where it
threatens to step into high gear and deliver anything memorable either. The set
up is intriguing because it flies in the face of what we have come to expect
from Star Trek (that space travel always yields positive results) but was there
ever any doubt that Voyager’s motley crew wouldn’t be able to put this planet
and its people out of its misery with a quirk of technobabble? Had this been
DS9 I could envisage a far darker ending.
Bringing back Carey just to kill him off is such a pointless act – its
not like we’ve seen anything of this character for five years. It would have
had much more impact has Tom or Neelix been gunned down. Mike Vejar’s direction
is as polished as ever but he can only film what has been written and without
the ability to take risks or push the show into really disturbing areas he is
merely polishing a turd. There have been far worse episodes of Voyager but
there have been far better ones too: 5/10
Natural Law written by James Khan and directed by Terry
Windell
What’s it about: Its time to protect the primitives…
Tattoo: Chakotay practically climaxes at the sight of
natives on the alien planet and it looked set to be another tedious exploration
of his native American roots.
Borg Babe: With the Seven/Chakotay scenes they are somewhat
caught between a rock and hard place because it was so vomit inducingly awful
in Human Error to recapture that ineptitude is to invite ridicule and yet to
ignore that it ever happened looks even more ham-fisted. In other news Seven of
Nine is befriended by apathetic primitive aliens that teach her how to
appreciate nature. Somehow when this character was brought onto Voyager and
began her long journey from drone to human I didn’t imagine quite that this was
where she would end up. It’s the last episode devoted entirely to her character
and by jiminy it’s a stinker.
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘There’s always time for warp dynamics
but you don’t see natural beauty like this every day…’ – Chakotay is trying to
sound romantic again. Somebody shoot him.
‘I’m planning to spend as much time with you as you
need…’ – and all Tom wants to do is have fun with his friends. Jeez this is
desperate stuff.
The Good: Some effects shots with the Delta Flyer. These
reviews are starting to get predictable.
The Bad: I suppose a shuttle crash was inevitable this close
to the end…it was one of those staples that Voyager relied on a little too
often that was bound to rear its ugly head before the shows climax. Like time
travel, crew members acting out of character and the Borg. Imagine how brave it
would have been to have actually killed off Chakotay and Seven like this. To
stick one in the face of critics like me but no with predictable results they
wind up on another Earth like forest on another Earth like planet. So far so
Innocence (the season two clunker). Tom Paris has to go back to piloting school
so cue the oh-so-amusing scene where Neelix, Harry Kim and B’Elanna all catch
up with him in a corridor and take the piss. I’ve seen this scene played out
about ten times now over the course of the show and then somehow manage to get
less funny every single time. The shot of Seven by the waterfall is shockingly
bad – why couldn’t they have just filmed this little insert by a real
waterfall? Especially if they have the money to whisk up an entire jungle in
the studio. The scenes featuring the Ventu are the most snooze worthy this show
has been all season. Literally nothing happens. Sincerity is a virtue
but taken to this degree its like watching morally sound paint drying. I can’t
believe the episode shoves in a ‘let’s get the Indians out of here so we can
exploit the land’ moral at the end. It’s the most obvious place the show can go
so naturally that’s where we head. Unbelievably the Tom Paris subplot isn’t
actually about anything…as soon as its done filling out the episode
nonsensically Janeway orders Paris back into action. We learn nothing about
either Tom or the instructor and the subplot has no relevance to main plot at
all. Have the writers on this show just given up and decided to stuff any old
nonsense in to get to the end of the season?
Moment to Watch Out For: Seven accepting a blanket. It’s the
most exciting thing that happens. The only moment I felt anything besides sheer
borderm.
Teaser-tastic: A shuttle crash. That’s original.
Fashion Statement: The most interesting thing about Natural
Law (yes I know I’m reaching…) is how Seven’s hair gets more and more untidy
and unkempt as the episode progresses. It starts off in a neat little bun, then
there are a few straggly strands, then most of it has fallen out and then it is
hanging free and wild! She should always have it down, it looks great.
Orchestra: Its time to visit the natives again so the wood
flute gets its annual airing.
Result: Surely there was something more exciting to do than
have Chakotay and Seven (because we all know how well that pairing went down in
Human Error) getting friendly with a bunch of natives whilst Tom Paris takes
his driving test. The Chakotay plotline is like a poor amalgamation of Tattoo
and Darmok whilst the sub plot featuring the worlds slowest driving instructor
is reminiscent of Neelix’s nightmare in Someone to Watch Over Me. I don’t ask
for much from this show and to be honest I don’t expect a great deal either so
why do they keep churning up old Trek episodes in such a ponderous, seen that
moral before fashion? There’s no pace, no excitement, no drama, no wit, no
intelligence…when people clamour for Star Trek to return as a television series
they have to remember episodes like this and pray that things never get this impotent
again. Somewhere along the line Voyager stopped being a progressive show and
started making hour long lectures – I haven’t felt this bored by anything since
I was a kid in a classroom staring at the clock waiting for lunch to hurry up.
This episode occupies the same position in the final season as DS9’s Tacking
Into the Wind – where that was one of the finest every Trek episodes, Natural
Law is one of the worst: 1/10
Homestead written by Raf Green and directed by LeVar Burton
What’s it about: Neelix leaves Voyager when he discovers a
Talaxian colony that needs his protection…
Hepburn-a-Like: Janeway is willing to violate the Prime
Directive to help a friend in distress. It’s a touching final gesture from a
Captain to a man who has given her everything he has. I love the way Janeway
gives Neelix an out in way that makes him feel that he is still of use to
Voyager and allows him to go without ever saying he wants to.
Mr Vulcan: It pleases me to say that in the twilight of
their doomed relationship (doomed in the sense that it never quite worked in
the way that the writers devised…it never even got close to approaching the
Odo/Quark family in adversity vibe) there is something touching to be said
about how Tuvok and Neelix feel about each other. They might have annoyed the
hell out of each other for seven years but familiarity has bred respect and
their ‘hypothetical’ conversation sees Tuvok aiding Neelix in his plans to save
the Talaxians. For Tuvok to say that Neelix is much more than just a cook and that
he is one of the most resourceful individuals that he has ever known pulls at
the heartstrings because its only during these farewell episodes where all the
pretence falls away. I thought Neelix attempting to make Tuvok dance was
another of those hideous moments of comedy that the show plummets to, I never
thought it was setting up a touching final gesture from the Vulcan to his
Talaxian friend.
Spotted Dick: Oh Neelix. Whether you found him to be a
disappointment or not depends on whether you saw potential in his character in
the first place. When I first watched Voyager’s run (on its first UK
transmission) there was no doubt that he was one of my least favourite
characters from any Star Trek incarnation. When I approached my marathon review
rewatch I expected that opinion to hold but to my everlasting surprise I have
found that by not expecting a great deal from the character has meant that he
has been able to quietly astonish me on occasion. Don’t get me wrong there were
all the horrors I remembered (his jealousy with Tom Paris, his odd relationship
with Kes, his insistent perkiness and his deeply unfunny love/hate relationship
with Tuvok) but there was also a gentle charm that could be relied on when the
chips were down and the odd cherishable moment of depth (I can recall many a
late night conversation in the Mess Hall when various crewmembers are having
trouble sleeping). Ethan Philips has proven revelatory too; annoying (as an
actor would be) when written that way but delivering when the writers decide to
give the character something to do. Of all the Voyager characters, Neelix is
the one I have re-evaluated the most for the better during this re-run of the
show (whereas Janeway is by far the character who was re-evaluated for the
worse). There have even been a decent number of Neelix-centred episodes in the
first couple of seasons before the character seemed to have been forgotten
(Jetrel, Fair Trade, Mortal Coil). Homestead proves to be a surprisingly
poignant final hurrah for an unpopular character but for me it’s a pleasing
curtain call for a mishandled but potentially great comic foil. He’s no Quark
(to the nth degree) but he had it in him to be much better than he was.
We open Homestead with Neelix doing what he does best,
entertaining and serving the crew and irritating Tuvok. It would seem the
writers are trying to get the long term reviewer to remember all the worst
times with Neelix as well as the best because his spasmodic dance at the
jukebox is highly reminiscent of a similar scene that polluted the pre credits
sequence in Warlord (the very thought of which brings me out in hives). His
friendship and subsequent relationship with Dexa makes a lot more sense than
anything he had with Kes (which at best felt icky because of the age difference
and at worst brought Neelix’s hideous jealous streak) and it helps that Philips
and Julianne Christie share a pleasant, gentle chemistry. If you are a cynical
viewer than you might find Neelix acquiring a new Talaxian family a bit twee
but its about as close to a happy ending that anybody gets on this show and
given that it has always been in his nature to give it seems fitting that he
should be rewarded at the end. Philips works beautifully with children (the
best parts of The Haunting of Deck Twelve saw him telling a ghost story to the
Borg children) because he can get down on their level without patronising them.
Seeing his own people again is food for thought for Neelix, he hadn’t really
thought about it before but its probably the last time we will ever see any of
his people again. Its lovely that Chakotay and Harry Kim chooses to big Neelix
up in front of Brax (the look on his face at his friends praise turns what
could have been a potentially ropey moment into something much more poignant)
and turns out to be the best thing either character does in the final season.
He’s been saving a bottle of Talaxian wine for 15 years, a last touch of home
that he wasn’t sure that he would ever open. Now keeping hold of a piece of
Talaxia isn’t necessary because he has found something far more precious to
replace it. As soon as he opens that bottle its clear that Neelix isn’t going
to be warping off with his friends at the end of the episode. Naomi is too old
to be put to bed and told stories to now…it’s a subtle reminder of how much she
has grown up and doesn’t need Neelix in the same way. It makes the audience
realise the draw of Dexa and Brax. His final choice isn’t a light one but it
does make perfect sense. Neelix is now an Ambassador in the Delta Quadrant and one
with a family of his own. If I were Ethan Philips I would be very happy to have
exited the show (he gets cameos in the next two episodes but that’s all they
are) on my own character drama rather than being shuffled into the pack with
the rest of the cast in the disappointing End Game.
The Good: The Delta Flyer skimming across the surface of an
asteroid is way cool. There is no doubt that Voyager’s effects sequences kick
some serious ass at this point. Who would have ever guessed that this was the
same Rob LaBelle that played the irritating chump Kafar in False Profits.
Amazing what a slap of latex can do. The chessboard patterned aliens aren’t the
most incredible species that Voyager has stumbled across but its another
example of the superb make up the show commands. I like the way the camera
lingers on Neelix after the negotiations have failed, almost to highlight the
sense of failiure he is feeling. For a while it looks like the Talaxians will
be joining Voyager but that is just a red herring so we can manoeuvre Neelix
into the position of standing up for the underdog. It works in exactly the same
way it did for Rom in Bar Association, a man stepping out of his comfort zone
and standing up against something that is wrong.
The Bad: Rather than contrive an excuse for how Talaxians
manage to turn up this many light years away from their home planet, Homestead
instead chooses to ignore this plot hole completely and leave the audience to
fume. There is a sense of predictability about this episode that renders any of
its potential shocks null and void. Brax turning up on the Delta Flyer is
immediately obvious, as is the fact that not everything is as it seems on the
colony. The mechanics of the plot are all grinding into a position so that
Neelix can pull out a gun a protect his newfound family.
Moment to Watch Out For: I was astonished at how much
Neelix’s final walk through the ships corridors was, the crew all lining up to
say goodbye to him. Its rare for Voyager to indulge in sentiment like this and
for it not tip over the edge into syrupy mush (can you recall Once Upon a Time)
but this is a very satisfying acknowledgement of everything Neelix has given
the crew. Tuvok’s final gesture to Neelix (not too bold but just enough for him
to remain in character) gave me a lump in the throat.
Fashion Statement: Right up to his last episode, Neelix’s
sense of style borders on the ludicrous. He wears hideous multi coloured smocks
which somehow manage to make Ethan Philips look far tubbier than is actually
the case.
Result: Whilst it comes about six and a half seasons too
late and several gulps through space away from Talaxia, Homestead proves to be
a surprisingly touching little character story for Neelix to be reunited with
his people. There is nothing especially memorable about the direction of this
episode (but with LeVar Burton helming it that is no great surprise) but since
it is primarily a character drama that isn’t really a problem. There are some
moments that are so cloying they get stuck in the throat (usually centring on
Naomi Wildman as usual) but ultimately thanks to a script that has a clear
vision of what it wants to achieve and a pleasingly shy and thoughtful turn by
Ethan Philips Homestead overcomes its sugary goodness and provides some touching
moments. The bitter irony of Voyager’s (lack of) wrap up and the very nature
that his departure is handled over 45 minutes means that one of the shows least
popular characters gets the best send off. This wont blow you away but if you
turn the cynical part of your mind off it might quietly surprise you with its
delicate sentiment: 7/10
Tattoo: Chakotay is dead. Let joy be uncontained! Its almost
worth skipping forward 10 years just to be able to type those words. When we do
head back in time and he reappears you can feel the quality of the episode
shift downwards a gear, his dreary presence knocking us down into the usual
Voyager tedium.
Mr Vulcan: What a shame that Tuvok’s madness is contained to
a defunct timeline because I could have seen this playing out over a couple of
season had the production team had some balls.
Spotted Dick: Its nice that we get to catch up with Neelix in the last episode. Like him or loathe he was a major part of this show for seven years and its only right that he should show up for the swansong. Obviously the crew like having an irritating buffoon in the kitchen since they replace the ever cheerful Neelix with the even more outrageous Bolian, Chell.
Renaissance Man written by Phyllis Strong & Mike Sussman
and directed by Mike Vejar
What’s it about: How many Doctors are there in a Starship
lost in the Delta Quadrant?
Hepburn-a-Like: What a shame that Janeway turns out to be
the Doctor in disguise because for once I could actually get behind what her
character was saying. Her angry rant about being tired of taking risks in order
to get the crew home actually resonates. Maybe the writers should have been
characterising her as the Doctor the whole time. I love how the crew start
suspecting her of being an imposter when she starts asking odd
questions…especially when our Janeway has behaved far more out of character than
this on the long slog through the Delta Quadrant and they never suspected
anything out of the ordinary.
Tattoo: Michael Vejar dances around the Captain and First
Officer when Chakotay shows a rare bit of initiative and tricks Janeway into
revealing that she isn’t herself. It’s a real moment of tension even if it does
remind me of the cargo bay scene between them in The Voyager Conspiracy.
Exposing Beltran as one of the weakest performers of this ensemble, I could
barely detect any difference between his performance as Chakotay and his
performance as the Doctor. Or should that be I couldn’t detect any effort.
EMH: In his own modest way the Doctor has come to realise
that whilst at one point in his seven year life he would have killed to be
human (ala Data) he has come to realise that it is far superior that he isn’t
(ala Spock). The one character beat the emerges from this episode is that the
Doctor wants to start socialising with Janeway, a position that she feels
uncomfortable with but considers changing for him. The Doctor’s goodbye speech
to the crew (including the revelation of his diary that lists all of Janeway’s
most questionable decisions) when we know he is going to survive is very funny.
Its obvious but its hilariously played by Picardo.
Brilliant B’Elanna: In comparison to Beltran, Dawson is all
mechanical ticks and masculine detail when playing the Doctor. Paris almost
winds up having a romantic dinner with the Doctor and Dawson really sells the
comedy of the Doctor’s discomfort at having to endure a long romantic kiss with
the Lieutenant.
Forever Ensign: I couldn’t help but cheer when Harry Kim
ended up locked up in the morgue.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘You wouldn’t shoot a pregnant woman,
would you?’
‘Mr Tuvok, I violated the most sacred trust between a
physician and his patient. I told Mr Neelix about the cutaneous eruption on
your…’ and ‘Ensign, at your recital last month I told Lieutenant Torres that
your saxophone playing reminded me of a wounded Targ…’
Dreadful Dialogue: ‘Voyager can survive without a warp
core…but not without a Captain’ – the Doctor trying to score brownie points
after his subterfuge.
The Good: To this episodes credit it does manage to hide the
Doctor’s secret for quite some time. I take my fun where I can the image of
Robert Picardo talking with Kate Mulgrew’s voices gives the impression of a
camp man that has been smoking 20 a day for the past 30 years. Well it made me
laugh. Halfway through the episode the Doctor has been playing so many members
of the crew it is as hard for him as it is for us to keep up with who he is
supposed to be from one scene to the next. As we skip towards the conclusion
its hard to figure who the Doctor will be next and that’s mildly diverting.
The Bad: How very odd to see Vorik turn up so close to the
shows conclusion. Are they going to do something this character now? For a
laugh they should have filled engineering with all the characters that were
touted as possible semi regulars but never amounted to anything – Samantha
Wildman, Carey, the Maquis members from Learning Curve and the social misfits
from Good Sheppard. Remember when the good ship Voyager ominously entered Borg
space? Recycling that plot for the R’Kall simply doesn’t cut the mustard. The
alien make up this week doesn’t look that much different from that of last
weeks one-shot species. Are the make up designers lacking inspiration? Are we
honestly supposed to find the Hierarchy a menacing final threat to the Voyager
crew? They are the daftest species they have ever encountered! Who else was
disappointed when Chakotay and Kim were taking out of cold storage and we learn
that they ‘just unconscious.’
Moment to Watch Out For: The Doctor leaps through walls! The
Doctor fills the holodeck with thousands of clones of himself1 The Doctor can
walk up walls, Matrix style! This is simply an excuse to do all the things with
the Doctor that show hasn’t yet attempted…but to be fair I would rather watch
daft fun like this than endure another hideous holodeck programme like Fair
Haven.
Teaser-tastic: Possibly one of the dullest pre-titles
sequences ever which tells you very little about the episode ahead and
re-iterates the Doctor’s ego in a way that reveals nothing new.
Result: ‘Goodbye my friends! Speak well of me!’ Fun
but entirely disposable so I guess that makes this the perfect representation
of this show in its last gasp before the finale. What Renaissance Man turns out
to be is a last chance for the cast of this show to let their hair down and get
to have a go at playing the Doctor – Body and Soul Mark II if you like. The way
the Doctor waltzes around the ship knocking out the crew and taking over the
ship could be seen as a not so subtle metaphor for how Robert Picardo stole the
limelight from his cast mates on so many occasions throughout Voyager’s run.
Within this episode the characters that he mimics are a lot more fun than they
have been in a while so perhaps the Doctor invasion should have occurred a lot
sooner! With Mike Vejar directing there is the appropriate energy to make this
sort of screwball comedy work and whilst I might have preferred something with
a little more substance as the penultimate episode at this stage of the game I
will happily settle for something that amuses. As usual Robert Picardo (or
Robert Picardo impersonations in this case) equates entertainment. The
Hierarchy are still rubbish, though: 7/10
Endgame written by Kenneth Biller & Robert Doherty
(although the storyline reeks of Brannon Braga & Joe Menosky) and directed
by Allan Kroeker
What’s it about: 10 years after Voyager returned to the
Alpha Quadrant Admiral Janeway decides to head back in time and change how
things turned out…
Hepburn-a-Like: Its nice that Kate Mulgrew gets to stretch
her wings in the last episode and bring something new to the role that she has
played for the last seven years. Her grey haired, embittered Admiral Janeway is
a believable character and the scenes of her reminiscing with her old crew do
have some chemistry to them. She’s a gentle authorative figure that gives lectures
on the many foes that she encountered on her journey home through the Delta
Quadrant. The scene where she tries to tell Tuvok that she is going away and
might be able to make things right for him is very nicely performed by both
actors, re-introducing the chemistry between the two characters that was
abundant in season one but got lost in the intervening years. She thinks its a
little late for marriage and considers it an indulgence of the young. Its
interesting that in What You Leave Behind Sisko gets to become a God and in
Endgame Janeway wants to play God…I know which one of them is more suited to
the role. I realise how much she loves every member of her ‘family’ (because
she’s gone on about it for the past seven years) but changing the lives of every
single person on the Earth over a ten year period is a bit much to ask just to
bring two crewmembers back to life and spare another from madness. What if
entire wars spring up because of her tinkering? What if the return of Chakotay
brings about some terrible catastrophe? Everybody looks reasonably happy in the
future (except Tuvok but then he was never exactly a barrel of laughs) and so
to poison all that with an alternative timeline seems a little grandiloquent on
Janeway’s part to save a few lives. She’s never been known for coming up with
the best schemes in the past but she has always tried to adhere to the revered
Prime Directive and so to head of on a mission this mind numbingly stupid
defies belief. Mind I’m in two minds as to whether this jaded ‘I don’t give
a shit about the temporal Prime Directive’ is any a superior option to the
rulebound (unless they go against what she wants to do) bug-up-her-butt
matriarch that we are used to. Of course our Janeway takes the older ones
option, even she can’t imagine another 16 years of this show! Janeway coming
face to face with exactly the same situation as the one in Caretaker is this
series coming full circle. She has within her grasp a way to return home but
her first instinct (because it is something that gives the Borg a huge tactical
advantage over their enemies) is to destroy (even her doppelganger is appalled
at this suggestion). Its odd that it takes the deaths of one of her senior
officers to make Janeway act (there are 21 others that are killed on the long
journey home but really its Seven’s death that is prompting her) when she has
already lost a fair number of crewmembers along the way. Shouldn’t she have
gone back even further to the point where nobody had died and tried to get the
ship home from there? Oh no wait because then Seven would never have joined
Voyager and oh my word I’ve gone cross eyed. This kind of temporal bollocks
gives me a headache!
Tattoo: Chakotay is dead. Let joy be uncontained! Its almost
worth skipping forward 10 years just to be able to type those words. When we do
head back in time and he reappears you can feel the quality of the episode
shift downwards a gear, his dreary presence knocking us down into the usual
Voyager tedium.
EMH: ‘It took you 33 years to come up with Joe?’ –
and what, pray tell, is wrong with Joe? The Doctor is getting married to the
foxiest babe in Quadrant who just happens to be flesh and blood. It looks like
he has made quite a name for himself in the Alpha Quadrant as a hologram that
truly went where no man has gone before. Of course none of this matters one jot
because this entire timeline is erased to make room for a new one. So catching
up on these developments was a big fat waste of time. End Game tells us nothing
about ‘our’ Doctor and how he ended up. All the development he enjoyed over the
years winded up climaxing on…nothing.
Brilliant B’Elanna: One of the few things I can compare DS9
and Voyager to and the latter comes out stronger is the two pregnancy
storylines that they indulged in. Kira’s pregnancy came to fruition with some
farcical sitcom antics between O’Brien and Shakaar that failed to raise a
smile. Tom and B’Elanna’s is played out much more naturally with both actors
well in tune with each other by now and making this feel like a special event.
She has gotten used to the idea of raising her daughter on Voyager and finds it
odd to think that she might be born in the Alpha Quadrant. I want to say that
the pregnancy drama taking place during an action sequence is wholly original
but even that played out along exactly the same lines with Samantha Wildman in
Deadlock.
Borg Babe: Hang on I thought Seven found out that she
couldn’t pursue romance because of some tongue-twisting technobabble? It was an
irritating reset but at least it spared us scenes of Ryan and Beltran
pretending that they are head over heels in love with each other which is about
as convincing as the finales plot. Once again the writers conveniently forget
what they have set up in the past and make up the rules as they go along. When
they do explain this reset but it has the adverse effect of making the
conclusion of Human Error even more pointless. Watching Seven and Chakotay kiss
is about as erotic as geriatric pornography. The Ezri/Bashir romance angle in
DS9’s Final Chapter might have been drawn out but at least it was a natural
coming together of two characters and when they do come to terms with their
feelings they leap into bed and have at it like a pair of crazed voles.
Chakotay and Seven indulge in sickly wordplay and when she realises that she
might lose him Seven decides to ‘change the parameters of their relationship.’
Oh yuck. Learning that they are at the eve of a great, defining battle had to
reverse effect on Bashir and Ezri – they were at it like honeymooners! I know
which couple I believe in more. Admiral Janeway tries to recruit Seven to her
cause but she refuses, considering her death a small payment if it means the
Borg threat is crippled. I preferred this woman when she was a selfish, morally
bankrupt drone. She was much more fun back then. And even surprised on
occasion.
Mr Vulcan: What a shame that Tuvok’s madness is contained to
a defunct timeline because I could have seen this playing out over a couple of
season had the production team had some balls.
Parisian Rogue: The one beat of character that really struck
me as being real was Paris’ assertion that he doesn’t need to return to Earth
because Voyager is his home now. He began this journey as a criminal and ended
it as a husband and a father to be. It might have meant making the character
less interesting but in terms of quality of life Paris has never had it better.
Comparing his lack of excitement with Harry’s tail wagging at the thought of
making it back to the Alpha Quadrant is very telling.
Forever Ensign (except in this alternative universe): Harry
finally managed to obtain the rank of Captain and has been out on deep space
assignments. This can only be explained by the dearth of decent officers caused
by the Dominion War so men of less ability have to be promoted instead. Come
on, it’s the last episode! You don’t think I’m going to start saying nice
things about Harry now, do you? Of course none of this matters one jot because
this entire timeline is erased to make room for a new one. So catching up on
these developments was a big fat waste of time. Sometimes you really want a
character to slip on a banana skin in the middle of a speech because it is so
mind-fudgingly awful and Harry’s ‘maybe it’s the journey that matters’
definitely qualifies. You just need one character to laugh to make this a
little self mocking but no they all raise their mugs to his cloying sentiment.
The Dysfunction King: Its always nice to catch up with Reg
whether he is a geriatric version from a invalid timeline or not although I
have to admit that after his stellar return in Pathfinder each subsequent
appearance on Voyager was less special than the last.
Sparkling Dialogue: ‘I’ll answer all your questions once
we’re back in the Alpha Quadrant!’ – older Janeway’s logic is impeccable, her
timeline will be defunct and she will no longer exist so she’ll have nobody to
answer to!
Dreadful Dialogue: ’23 years together made you a family…’
– at least they were consistent right up to the end.
‘Wherever I end up I’m going to make sure its within
transporter range of you…’ – if we had known that Seven would wind up having
conversations like this with Chakotay of all people perhaps we wouldn’t have
been so keen to follow her journey.
The Good: The various make up jobs for the crew of Voyager
26 years in the future (than when we last saw them in Renaissance Man) are very
accomplished. Whilst Tom has some rather ugly liver spots, B’Elanna, Janeway
and Harry all look distinguished in their geriatric guises. Its lovely to have
so many scenes set on Earth as well. Given that the Federation’s base of
operations is so revered on TNG and VOY there was very little time spent on the
planet. DS9 avoided it too for the most part but then they were highly critical
of ‘paradise.’ Special effects are tops as usual and the near collision of
Voyager and a Borg Cube (despite their groan-worthy reappearance again) is
tensely done. Love Janeway’s armoured shuttle, that’s a lovely piece of design.
That’s nothing compared to the armoured Voyager which finally looks like a
genuine threat to the Borg. They should have introduced that years ago. They
knock out a handful of Cubes as though they are swatting a fly.
The Bad: How could they possibly have got this so wrong?
All the writers had to do was satisfyingly get the crew home at some point in
the seventh season and spend a number of episodes dealing with their
rehabilitation back on Earth. Even a brain dead in bred cretin could work that
one out. Instead they take us 26 odd years into the future to a time 10 years
after Voyager got home and give us the chance to see the crew catching up with
each other now they are off leading their own lives. Had they chosen to just go
down this route it would have been unsatisfying because we would never has seen
how Voyager made it home (I assume they just limped their way back to the Alpha
Quadrant) and how the crew found their homecoming. It would have failed to have
answered so many questions that this show has been leading to in seven years.
And yet because Janeway does go back in time and effectively erases this entire
timeline out of existence that is unsatisfying as well – not only
because there were some fine innovations (Chakotay dead, Tuvok nuts) but
because the first half of this story is now pretty much irrelevant. None of it
happened. Then after an episode of double Janeway’s (rehashing Deadlock) and
Borg shenanigans (name your episode) they are catapulted through space thanks
to a piece of technobabble that has never been heard of before and find
themselves home. Hurrah! And the episode ends. What? I mean…fucking what?
So we still don’t get to see how Chakotay, B’Elanna and Seven rehabilitated or
the reunions with their families or Janeway face up to some of her questionable
decisions…there is absolutely no closure to the series beyond the fact that the
crew made it home. Its astonishingly weak – 90 minutes of rehashing old plots
when there are some genuinely interesting and dramatic stories to be told. Its
just makes me insane. It makes the entire 7 year journey feel completely
pointless if this is all it was leading up to. What You Leave Behind may have
failed to have dealt with Bajor joining the Federation but it gave satisfying
closure to every one of its characters (including the myriad of semi regulars)
and the Dominion war storyline. In comparison this isn’t even popcorn
television, its just thin air. Dealing with nothing. Its unbelievable.
Couldn’t they have forked out for a little location filming for the scene by
Chakotay’s grave? It looks even more artificial than Tasha Yar’s did (and that
took place in a cheesy holographic backdrop!). The scenes on the Klingon ship
are flatter than a pancake – I wish we could skipped over these and moved on
with the plot. Admittedly she hasn’t done the most spectacular job in the role
but why depose Susannah Thompson and bring back Alice Krige in the role of Borg
Queen for the finale? Suddenly the Ice Queen we have been used to has been
replaced by a flirtatious carbon copy of the Queen we saw in First Contact and
this time she’s purring in Seven’s ear. Imagine giving up coffee? The very
thought! The final ignominy of the Borg is seeing the Queen clutching at parts
of an exploding set as Janeway sits smugly stage right. This is the
enemy that once threatened to bring down the Federation? Get out of town!
Wouldn’t it have been so funny if Q had turned up at the climax and flung them
back to the Delta Quadrant for cheating their own fate? I honestly believe that
this two parter should have begun where it ends with Voyager riding back to
Earth and spent the next two episodes dealing with their homecoming. That last
shot is so tantalisingly promising it makes me sick that we never find out what
happened next. Grrr…
Moment to Watch Out For: As much as it makes the Borg feel
even more barren than usual, the effects triumph of the Queen being slowly
amputated is gloriously achieved.
Fashion Statement: The uniforms in the future leave a lot to
be desired. Whatever happened to those fabulous gunmetal grew uniforms sported
on DS9? Now they look like they are wearing their pyjamas to work more than
ever.
Anomaly of the Week: How many wormholes have Voyager encountered
now? This one only leads back to the Alpha Quadrant because it’s the last
episode – if it was anything but it would be more clogged-up than a u bend
after Christmas dinner. Still at least it gives the crew to take the piss out
of the ever optimistic Harry once again. That never gets old. Since this
is the last episode they also toss in a temporal rift for old times sakes.
Result: ‘There’s got to be a way for us to have our cake
and eat it too…’ That’s the story of this shows life! There are many things
wrong with this finale that I have discussed in length above but the cardinal
error it makes is that just doesn’t have the ambition, the look and the tone of
a series finale. It feels like another bog standard Voyager time travel
two parter. As others have commented before Endgame is a mash up of several old
Voyager episodes; a dangerous mission into Borg territory (Dark Frontier),
matured characters coming back from the future to change the past (Timeless)
and most importantly of all Janeway’s terrible choice to have to get her crew
home or stop an enemy from exploiting technology (Caretaker). The fake Janeway
infiltrating the enemy was handled in The Thaw and the pregnancy during
jeopardy was done to much better effect in Deadlock (along with the duel
Janeways). There’s nothing here that we haven’t seen before done better. Its
such a shame because as usual with this show it has all the resources to be a
genuinely great series and finale. The performances are fantastic (with Kate
Mulgrew acting her heart out in two roles), the direction is imaginative
(Kroeker back on form providing some energy where the script falters) and there
is enough budget to make the ambitions settings and action sequences come to
life. How a show can be so hampered by the weariness of its writers baffles me,
there is just so little here to get excited about as we chalk up one Voyager
cliché after another. I realised about ten minutes from the end that the show
was going to climax with the ship getting home and none of the temptingly
dramatic issues concerning their return to the Alpha Quadrant were ever going
to be dealt with. I literally crumpled on the sofa…I have sat through seven
seasons of extremely variable television with little but the promise of an
exciting homecoming and even that was going to be denied to me. Worse than
having to sit through some televisual excrement is that crushing feeling of
disappointment that we weren’t actually heading anywhere important. False
promises leading to damp squib of a conclusion. It’s a crushing final
disappointment from a show that deserved to be to so much more: 4/10
5 comments:
Bully to you for sticking it out through a show you so clearly loathed.
Not so much loathed as tolerated. When Voyager was good, it was very good...that just wasn't very often. There were spells in seasons two and five where the show threatened to fulfill its potential. So often though it resorted to undemanding, empty entertainment when it had the potential to be so much more. A shame.
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